Seduce like Seuss 😵💖🥴👅💦

3. Why did i put so much effort into this

Grichard spent 25 days in his cave, healing from the bazooka. The month was almost over. His period had come and gone. Today was the day before Olivia moved to Seussstralia.

Max hadn't left his side in 600 hours. He was ready to end it and jump from his ego to his iq.

Bring bring
It is phone

Grichard picks up with moist hands. Why are they moist? I'm trying to gross you out.

"Grichard, it's me." Said familiar voice. Grinch ran a sopping wet hand through his antennas.
"Purple bear from Dora? My old girlfriend? Is that you?" Said grinch
"I am married now, grichard. I have changed my name. My name is hazard now. My husbands name is Elliot from E.T. He may be a child star who nobody remembers but he is my dearest and I love him."
"Why you call"
"Even though you gave me the greatest 2 years of my life, I am over you now."
"What that mean"
"If you had tried to date anyone else before I got married to child actor, I would have fought your beloved to the death."
"Ah"
"Bye bitch"
Hazard hung up.
Top ten times grichard got gnomed, number geleven, gwriting gthis ggoddamned gshitstorm

Now that his ties were severed, it was time to propose to Olivia the who who stole his heart.
He whittled a diamond ring out of bellybutton hair, combed his head hairs into a handsome middle part and secreted extra grinch juice so he could slither with ease down the mountain to her who home.

"One last thing," he said, turning to face max.
"You are free from your services now max. I have finally found companion that isn't dummy stupid like you."
Max immediately leapt to his feet and did an impressive Irish jig. He pulled a zipper down from his forehead to reveal Toby from the office.
"Senpai has released me! OWO~ Toby is FREEEEEE" He bellowed as he flew away into the night.
"Whack" said grichard, and then he too leapt into the night and slid down the mountainside like a sled covered in grease.

Sliding up to Olivia's house, the grinch prepared himself for this momentous task. Shaking off the excess grinch liquid, he rang the doorbell.

Bring brong

It is whodah, her brother!
Grinch punted him all the way to seussstralia in frustration. (He was ok)
Entering her home, the grinch noticed the boxes every which way. Suddenly, Olivia!
She jumped out of box in confusion.
"Whodah? I need you to tape me into the box for the flight!"
"Hello dearest." Said grichard, uttering a grinchy purr that make Olivia's heart go boom
"I am here to ask for, b-b-b-b-be my wife! Move into my cave and stay with me!"
"O////O" Said Olivia was surprise!
BOOM! Big figure burst through wall! It was hazard, purple bear from Dora!
"I AM DIVORCE ELLIOT! I WILL FIGHT YOUR BRIDE FOR CLOSURE!"
"ThATS UNHEALTHY COPING BEHAVIOR!" Said whodah from seussstralia.

Olivia decided in that moment that she was going to fight for her new fiancé. She wrapped up her little who hands (but still too big to fit into the bottom of a Pringle's can) and got ready to rumble!
Hazard swiped with her claws. Olivia dodged and jumped on top of her bear head, pulling out a metal pipe on the way!
Hazard did a forward roll but Olivia clutched onto the bears strangely blonde eyebrows.
"THAT GRINCH IS DODGE NEON PROPERTY, NOW, YOU PURPLE HO"
Finally, Olivia snorted a line of Advil she stole from the boys bathroom and smashed hazard in the head with the pipe, giving her frosted tips.
"NOOOOOOOOO ANYTHING BUT FROSTED TIPS!!" She yowled like a thunderclan cat. "You have won, Olivia." Hazard said sadly and bowed to her opponent, before leaving through the bear shaped hole in the wall.
Olivia walked back over to the grinch, wrapped her arms around his calf, (she is 3"2 and he is 8"3") smiling as the grinch slid the bellybutton diamond over her small (but still too big to fit into the bottom of a Pringle's can) finger. The lovers could finally be togther.

...
"Do you, grinch, take this whoman to be your unlawfully wedded who bride?" Said E.T., the minister of their whedding.
"Yepperoonie" grichard guffawed.
"And do you, Olivia Dodge-Neon, take this.... thing.... to be your unlawfully wedded whosband?" E.T. Purred.
"Yeehaw" Olivia stated.
"Then I unlawfully pronounce you Whosband and Whife! You may now kiss the bride!"
The grinch reached down and picked up his tiny (but still too big to fit into the bottom of a Pringle's can) bride. She fondly flashed her who fangs and he displayed his decaying teeth before he brought her in for a gentle and consenting smooch. The crowd went wild. Justin E. fondled his magic rocks, Hagrid and filch cuddled and cried together in the back, allura and Keith hugged pidge and lotor excitedly, and Ryan and Shane high fived because they were never going to be anything more than friends.

"Time to throw the bouquet!" Olivia cheered. The three attention whores (grog, dorontos and cat fucker) perked up, excitedly twitching their who snouts with anticipation. Swaggie fondly watched, because she had finally begun using regular sweetened peanut butter and her newly nourished flowers were in that very bouquet.
"1, 2, 3!" Olivia counted as she threw the flowers over her shoulder with glee. There was a great scuffle of eager whos, but it was Dobby the house elf who proved victorious, rushing off to kiss his boyfriend, Harry, with the flowers in hand.

The grinch strutted over and put a moist hand on Olivia's little (but still too big to fit into the bottom of a Pringle's can) who head.
"I can't wait to start a new life in whonada with you, babygirl," he said fondly. "The healthcare will be perfect for our future children."
"Me too, babe." She said, intertwining his dank, supple hand with her own. "But those children might not be as future as you think,"
"What do you mean?" Said the grinch, startled in a good way.
"Meet your son, his name is MUSTAFA"
And out from her chest burst a new life.
The life of their first son.
"Papa, uwu t'es?" He wailed. 
"Why... he's perfect." Said the grinch.
The end.