Getting to Trust You

Prologue

When I first saw her, I felt breathless for the very first time and the boys used to tease me about it and they were right. In three years, they have never seen me behave like that. I used to flirt with every woman I saw and I was happy doing just that, but then she happened and my whole life puzzled together.

It was hard to imagine, everything started by all the harassment fame world was doing to our lives, so management came up with a plan B. Taking us to a place where paparazzi where minimum. There were many places around the globe and as I was the youngest, I used those places more than once.

My place ended up being Manchester, New Hampshire, in the east coast of the United States. It was the furthest place I could go to be at peace with my thoughts, so I isolated myself to get some peace of mind in New England. By my third visit, I saw her entering the lobby and it was like someone had punched me, leaving me breathless.

I gasped for air, but my lungs, heart and body in general went numb. I remember Josh being Josh, laughing at me because of that. I was love struck by a girl who did not even acknowledged me. As we were leaving, we kept walking, but I turned around, trying to catch something else from her. She also turned around and I only caught three letters of her name. ICE.

On that flight back to London, I thought on every possibility of her name and I came up with nothing. Once we arrived to London and we were waiting for our suitcases, I googled it. I checked 182 names ending in ICE and just one made my stomach flutter. Alice. Her name was Alice; I was sure about that.

To be quite honest, when I saw her for the first time, I just wanted her to be in my bed and move on to the next girl, but as the days went by, her features burned my brain and I could not forget her, as much as I tried. I hooked up with other girls just to forget her face, but it was impossible. Fuck. I needed to have that girl. No matter how I would do it, but she had to be mine.

I tried to focus on my life and my own business, but that laugh and that face, haunted my mind, leaving me zoned out of my own thoughts. For the first time I saw myself with a girl in a normal relationship. In a relationship where no one won something dating the other. For the first time, I dreamed with real love and forgot about sex. I wanted something real.

Some weeks passed by and I was back in New Hampshire once again. This time, I looked for her, but Alice was not near to be seen. My stay passed rather quickly and I was back in London for the start of the tour. While I was on the plane, I checked my next free week, which was at the end of the first leg of the tour.

Soon enough, it was May and I was back in New Hampshire. I had at least a week to approach this girl. It was fall, so I had to do my best to hide from all people. I managed to walk around the hotel looking for her, but she was not there. I looked everywhere for her and she was nowhere to be found.

So, I went to the Laundromat to the hotel, there I heard some girls saying a group of friends would hit some club tonight, Alice included. A grin assaulted my face and I went back to my room, where Josh was just arriving from his skiing session. As soon as I entered the room, I told him our plans for that night. He just smiled and nodded while picking at his shoes looking for God knew what.

The hours passed by fast and we were on our way to the club, I was anxious and could feel my whole body in flames. I knew she was near. I could feel her. As ever, we waited in line and showed our fake IDs to get in. The music exploded and we scanned the whole place in search for Alice or any trace of her friends.

We found Alice a good half hour later and she was dancing happily with her friends, until some guy appeared and cut in between her and her female friend. Was it that easy to dance with her? I started walking over there, when that guy leaned closer to her lips and kissed her. My heart sped up, my bloodstream quickened, my mind was cloudy and my body was enraged.