"'Consumed by sadness and the fallout of a now retreating fear.' That ought to be tagline for what it's like sporking this shit." ~KittyHP [A/N true to my word.]
Sporking: Stones to Abbigale. A book so bad it misspells it's title character's name.
A...
itty: Praise be to all the Unholy Orifices of the Unyielding Space Vagina, that this chapter is only five pages long.
Wesker: *stepping through her freshly spawned portal, looking ever so slightly perturbed. brushes dust off his shoulder* What's all this nonsense about The Device causing viruses?
Kitty: You tell me, Mister-I-Specialise-In-Mass-Destruction-Via-Bioweapons *claws at Nick's slumped body, perched atop his shoulder*
Wesker: *narrows his eyes at her* Even if it had anything to do with me - and it doesn't - you can consider it payback for subjecting me to The Mister.
Kitty: Oh yeah. Cuz rotting in Hell was a better use of your talents.
Nick: *the lights of his eyes flicker on, as he begins to reboot - shudders as he straightens his back, glancing around, confused*
Kitty: Ick! *flops off his shoulders*
Wesker: Speaking of Hell, what twaddle are we dealing with?
Kitty: We call it Gerg.
Nick: Or Onision.
Kitty: Or Wanker.
Wesker: Will I being requiring--
Kitty: Substances? Yes.
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Nick: No!
Kitty: Aha, it speaks! How was that Hard Reboot?
Nick: Rough. Where's Hancock?
Kitty: The bitch bailed. And I thought it may be best to introduce you to my lil friend; Bravo. Bravo, Nick *gestures her paws between the two*
Wesker: *nods, inspecting the robot* Flawed infrastructure. Weakened by unoriginal human-like physiology.
Nick: Uh... Thanks?
Wesker: *turns on Kitty* Why d'you waste my time with this?
Kitty: Cuz... I like it when you do things to me.
Wesker: *arcs a brow, skeptical*
Nick: It's more likely because, despite being short, it's extremely presumptuous and filled with more teen angst than an episode of Gossip Girl.
Kitty: *gapes at him, her lower lip trembling as tears of joy fill her eyes* He... He knows references. This must be how the Virgin Mary felt *wipes away a tear* I am so proud of you.
Nick: *scratches his neck, where she'd implanted The Device, as his memories filtered back to him* Did I really turn violent? Over a hug?
Wesker: It was a fitting distraction. My alarms were going off as this one *nods towards Kitty* was plotting to Furrsplode another city off the map. Incidentally, which one were you targeting this time?
