Cold-Blooded Killers (Ticcidrowned)

•||Infinte.EXE||•

•Ben's POV•
Who am I?
Where am I?
Why am I here?
This place. . .
It's nothing but darkness.
This world. . .
Is nothing but an endless pit.
What's my purpose here in this strange world?
Do I even have a purpose?
Why am I soaking wet?
Why can't I breathe?
So many questions. . .
Yet, there's no one here to answer them.

"All will be revealed in time, Ben."

•Toby's POV•
I woke up on the bathroom floor again, feeling nothing.

There's no reason to get up. There's no reason to keep on living. There hasn't been a reason since that phone call I got 5 years ago. You know, the one where they found a body. Yeah, that body was his.

You'd think that after 5 years I'd be over it by now. But I'm not. No matter how hard I try, I can't get him out of my head. His mother wanted me to have his most valuable possessions, which consisted of: a Nintendo 64, The Legend of Zelda, Majora's Mask (for the N64), and a yellow N64 controller. Oh yeah, there's also a shit ton of hoodies. All of them are like 6 sizes too big for him, and they all have some kinda LOZ reference on them.

You're probably wondering why I haven't said his name yet. That's because I swore off mentioning his name in my mind 2 years ago. I haven't even thought of his name since. I was hoping that forgetting his name would mean I'd forget him, but that would be completely false. I still remember everything about him. His ocean blue eyes, his adorable button nose, his lips that were perfect even though he was insecure about them, the freckles that dotted his face, his golden blonde hair that didn't quite reach his shoulders, his short, petite body, and- God, I need to stop thinking about him.

The bathroom door opened, and I saw Lyra standing at the doorframe. She looked perfect as ever, it was as if she'd completely forgotten about him. I wish I could. Her hair was pulled up in a ponytail with her bangs swept to the side, she had her makeup all done and pretty. She wore a blue jacket that was zipped up halfway, hiding a black shirt beneath it, she wore a pair of jeans that had rips and tears scattered about them. She was like the opposite of how I looked right now.

She stuck out her hand, offering to help me up of the floor. "Come on Toby, get up. I'm taking you out of the house."

I groaned before slowly lifting my arm up to grab her hand. "B- but Lyra-"

"No, I'm getting you out of here, no more excuses." She interrupted, grabbing my hand and jerking me up to my feet before practically dragging me out of the house. "It's been months since you've been outside, you look like trash." Gee thanks Lyra, I really needed that.

She made me sit in the passenger seat of the old busted up car before jumping into the driver's side and shutting the door behind her.

There were a few minutes of awkward silence before Lyra spoke, "Toby, your 16 years old now. You aren't a child anymore, you need to get your shit together. I know you're still upset about Be- uhm, him, but that was years ago, and I need you to at least try and move on."

"I- I've been trying to f-f- forget for years L- Lyra," I objected as a tic forced my head to turn violently, "I've b- been trying r- really hard."

Lyra let out a sigh, "I know, I just really thought you would've been over him by now. You guys must've had some serious emotional bond that I didn't know about."

An emotional bond? That was a weird way to put it. "W- well-"

"Come to think, wasn't Ben like gay or something?" Lyra slapped her hand over her mouth as soon as she finished her sentence, knowing that she wasn't supposed to say that.

My eyes widened in shock, hearing Ben's name again, and his sexuality... it made me feel some kind of way. I couldn't quite describe the feeling.

"Toby, I'm sorry," Lyra apologized, "I didn't mean to say his name."

"Th- th- there's no point in refusing to say his name anyways," I said, looking down, "I'm going to think about him whether I say his name or not."

All of a sudden, Lyra made a huge u-turn on the road. "W- what the fuck Lyra?!"

"Watch your language." Lyra said, gripping onto the wheel tightly.

"What are you d- doing!?" I asked as my sister continued to put us both in danger.

"We're going back home," she answered simply, "and you're going to go through Ben's stuff and decide if you want it or not."

We were home in minutes, it wasn't like we went far or anything. I don't think Lyra had a plan for dragging me out of the house.

As I slowly made my way up to my room I saw Lyra begin to carry boxes in my room, some that I'd never seen before.

I sat down on my bed as Lyra carried in what I assumed was the final box.

"Decide what you want and what you don't want," she said, "this stuff's been sitting around collecting dust for 6 years now."

I couldn't bring myself to go near the boxes, but I know Lyra was going to force me eventually.

"Also, your 17th birthday is next week," she said, "maybe try thinking about what you want?"

I'd completely forgotten about me turning 17 next week. Last year when I turned 16 Lyra took me out of our abusive home. Ever since, Lyra has technically been my mother.

As she left the room, I sat down on the floor and scooted toward the boxes. Hesitantly, I reached out to one of the cardboard boxes and wiped some dust off of it.

It was quite intriguing, to be honest. Sure, I had gotten the most valuable of Ben's possessions, but Lyra got the more personal stuff. I inched closer to the box and began opening it.

The box appeared to be filled with notebooks. I reached out to the notebook on the top but something stopped me. Was this kind of an invasion of privacy? Even if Ben has... passed on, shouldn't I still respect his privacy?

I kinda shrugged it off as I grabbed the notebook on the top. Immediately, my heart began to fill with dread. Just the cover of it made me miss him all over again. It was covered in little doodles, such as the triforce, Kirby, the Xbox logo, little nerdy things like that.

I flipped the book open to the first page...