Awakening to Life

Awakening to Life 4

Chapter 4

I pull on the clothes Mum had left me and make my way to the teenager's lounge where I wait for Josh. Together we open a game of Monopoly and settle in for a long game. Josh is sitting in his pyjamas, his hair still growing back from when he shaved it. Within the kid's oncology ward he looks much more like a patient than I do in my faded jeans and oversized t-shirt, hair spilling over my shoulders as I reach to grab the dice.

It calms our nerves to be playing such a stable, familiar game - together. Before long, we've almost forgotten the drama of my sudden collapse and ambulance ride which brought us here. We laugh at the ridiculous additions to the chance and community chest cards that have been scribbled onto cards. We embrace the silly suggestions wholeheartedly, swapping, doubling and halving properties and money when told.

My phone buzzes in my pocket.

'Good night Allie. Don't let the bed bugs bite - and watch out for Dr Thompson, he likes to stick needles in you when you least expect it =P'

I read the text, giggling to myself. "Goodnight Paul," I whisper, a massive grin lighting up my face.

Clutching the phone, I send a quick reply. Josh raises his eyebrows at me, pulling a face at my reaction. I pull a pillow from my side and throw it at him. He snatches it out of the air easily and tosses it back.

Glancing at the clock, Josh pushes himself from the ground. Reaching out his hand, he pulls me up effortlessly. We return to my hospital room to eat dinner. Mum and Dad stand on either side of the bed, both setting up the food on the bedside tables. I frown miserably at the tray of hospital food on the bed, comparing the horrible meal to the delicious aromas of my family's dinner. Thankfully, they are generous, piling food on my plate without having to be asked.

Josh and I are excused after we've eaten. Letting the parents organise the aftermath of our small feast, we escape to the teenage lounge again. The monopoly game remains untouched. We resume as if there were no interruption.

"Dad told me what Dr Marsden said," Josh says hesitantly as I move my player around the board, paying a few notes as it lands on his property. I look up suddenly. Josh's sad eyes don't leave mine.

Looking away, I reply. "What did he say?"

"That you're going to die soon. He said there's nothing more the doctors can do."

"I'm sorry," I say, compelled by his sadness.

"I don't want you to die Allie." My heart breaks at his pure innocence. Tears fill his eyes but he wipes them away, refusing to cry in front of me. I am suddenly reminded that he isn't really a child anymore. At least, he's a teenager now, matured even more by my illness.

"I know. I'll stick around for as long as I can, ok?"

Neither of us speaks after that. Not about anything but the game.

I watch my brother from under my lashes. His face has lost some of the roundness and softness of youth. I wonder when it disappeared, and how I hadn't noticed before.

Pushing away the sadness, I concentrate on the game. After the time for dinner a few more kids come into the lounge, seeking a chance to relax and have some fun before lights out. We get louder and louder as the volume of the room increases. Josh yells in excitement as he dominates the game, placing hotel after hotel on his expensive properties.

A small girl in fairy wings darts past, knocking over Josh's carefully constructed hotels on Park Lane. A teenager boy rushes after her, grabbing her by the waist and swinging her into his arms. He turns to look at Josh, "Sorry about that, she's a bit excited to watch her new movie." He holds it up, indicating at the new fairy phenomena.

Josh glares down at the disaster on the board, his patterned construction ruined by the little girl. I laugh at his face and turn to the boy.

"It's not a problem," I say, meeting his eyes. I gasp.

No, I can't be...

I freeze, so does he as his eyes scan over me, widening in shock as his gaze darts to Josh and back to me. He opens his mouth, as if trying to say something to assert that the situation is real. Me and him in the oncology ward of the local hospital.

Jayden.

"Come on kids! Dr Marsden is waiting!" Mum says sharply, shooting an angry glance at the sight of Josh and me sitting on the carpet and looking extremely flustered. As Josh packs up the game at rapid speed I turn to look at Jayden, still standing in shock. The little girl tugs impatiently at his sleeve.

"We have to go."

He nods, as if in a trance as Josh and I jog over to Mum, who is still waiting at the entrance of the lounge. I feel like I'm in a trance too.

He knows.

I feel suddenly cold. Everyone will know my secret at school tomorrow, of that I am sure. Such fascinating gossip will travel quickly. The quiet girl has cancer. As of tomorrow, my nightmares will come true. I will be known as the girl with cancer. People will treat me differently.

Josh grips my hand softly as the tears overflow, streaming down my cheeks.

He knows.

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Hey,

Do you think it sounds realistic? We you like Josh?

=D