stargazing. || soongyu

⇸ eight.

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it was absolutely gorgeous outside. the sun shone brightly throughout the city, the temperature nice and warm. autumn was finally here, the leaves beginning to fall off of all the trees and litter sidewalks and roads. clouds were sparkled lightly into the baby blue sky, occasionally covering the sun. the wind gently ran through soonyoung's blonde hair, showing off small amounts of his forehead as he walked through the city.

even though it was absolutely gorgeous weather, soonyoung was not feeling as gorgeous. his nerves were racing around in his stomach, picking out every little thing to think about. he was currently walking to his first job as a choreographer and was so afraid of failing. he had plenty of things prepared, but didn't want to make a bad impression.

he was so caught in his own thoughts he almost tripped over a bundle of sticks laying out on the sidewalk.

"stupid sticks, move," he mumbled, kicking the sticks and continuing to walk. the building was pretty close, so he could easily walk and make it on time.

when he finally arrived, he walked in and told them who he was. he was introduced to the students and the staff, all giving him a warm welcome and he couldn't help but feel happy. all his worries felt like they were nothing. maybe taking the job would make him one step closer to accomplishing his dreams.

he was getting his own class, which would be a senior male group. there weren't too many of them, but he was still excited to meet them separately and hopefully bond. soonyoung was considered a senior at dancing and was told he could even dance with them if he wanted, which made him very excited.

he thought of a silly quote he's heard so many times,

"once the storm passes, the sun shines brighter."

it's something his mom would tell him whenever they were going through a rough time at home, and it always seemed to be true. that's why he looked up to her so much because she seemed to always be right. soonyoung wanted to be right, just like his mother.

this was one of the biggest storms he's been through, his relationship with wonwoo. he could see the sun finally peeking through the storm clouds, shining brightly. it made soonyoung motivated to go and do what he loved.

the three hours that he was signed to work went by in what felt like a flash. before he knew it, the clock was struck noon and he was supposed to be clocking out. yet, he didn't want to. he loved being there already, but he knew he wasn't getting paid overtime so he bid goodbye.

"alright, it was nice meeting you guys. i'll be back tomorrow." soonyoung smiled and dismissed everyone, the students laying on the ground and breathing after all the dancing. he left the building with a nice smile on his face and began his trip back home.

he could feel a genuine connection between the students he met, but apparently it wasn't all of them who were there. only three were there: jun, myungho, and chan. there were a few more: jihoon, seungcheol, joshua, and jeonghan. that was surprising to hear, he didn't know jeonghan was a dancer. it made him more excited to meet the others and see jeonghan too, it made him wonder how jeonghan and seokmin met. there was also times where they could come in and have free times, things like pizza and dance circles that were held every friday. it made soonyoung have an idea.

soonyoung also remembered he was also close by the coffee shop, the one mingyu works at and the one he always goes to. he wanted to go see mingyu, but he was all sweaty and gross from all the dancing. he finally just decided to go back and shower, then head to the cafe.

when soonyoung arrived back at his new home, seokmin was there happily munching on some cereal. "hey hyung! are you doing anything tomorrow?"

"no, why?" soonyoung asked, closing the door and removing his shoes.

"well, we were thinking if you wanted to come to hang out with me, jeonghan, and two of our other friends. they are super nice and friendly, i'm sure you would like them. you can actually hang out now since wonwoo isn't here to stop you. you can officially join the crew!" he smiled and looked up at him, waiting for an answer.

"sure, i'd love to. is it going to be us five?"

"yeah, but if mingyu goes it would make it six." seokmin replied, putting away the cereal. "you should ask him if he's free tomorrow."

"i will, i'm going to go to the cafe and finish up editing our song. i'll ask him." soonyoung smiled, "but first, i'm going to shower. i'll be back in a few hours."

soonyoung left and headed off to the bathroom to take a shower. he slipped off the clothes he was wearing and took a glimpse of his wrist. the scars he had were starting to heal and were closed, but were still visible to whoever looked at his wrist.

this was something he wanted to stop doing for a long time, but it was hard for him to stop. with this new life change, he knew stopping would be so much easier since the reason was out of the picture. he never told anyone about hurting himself like that, he always kept it away and wore long sleeves or bandages to cover them.

the hot water dripped down his body and let him relax, keeping the thoughts in his head. he knew it wasn't good to blame himself and even hurt his own body, but it felt so uncontrollable. it was so hard to abruptly stop something once they've started, but soonyoung was a brave man. he knew it could with the effort. when he packed his things, he didn't take a razor with him. it's all behind, just like his past.

soonyoung took a step onto a new path of life, one he wanted to be filled with joy and zeal for his hobbies. his new life was beginning now.

after he finished washing up, he stepped out of the shower and dried himself off as he walked over to his room. he got dressed into some skinny jeans and a white hoodie with a tiger on the front. he dried his hair and styled it into what he called the "classic coconut".

with his shoes on, soonyoung waved goodbye to the couple and stepped outside, beginning his journey over to see mingyu at the cafe.

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a small message;

i know that it might be a sensitive subject (self-harm), but lots of people are in that situation and being in an abusive relationship might cause someone to do it. i only know because of a friend, but i could be wrong.

it was hard to write that knowing i never wanted to see soonyoung ever do something like that, but it's just fictional.

out of this, please know you should never harm yourself to take out anger or sadness to make yourself feel better. there's so many different things you could do besides that. if you ever want to rant or talk, you can hit me up or a close friend. it's important to let it out your system instead of bottling it up.

anyways, have a good day (: lov u all ♡

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