You Said You Can't Live Without Me- So Why Aren't You Dead Yet? (gxg)

Run Away Girl

-Sam POV-

I Ran.

I don't know if that makes me weak or a chicken or in a flight or fight situation I chose flight, because I was scared.
Well... I was a flight or fight situation,
but when Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is involved, and my parents triggered it... again without realising it,

Flight was the only option my body saw fit and it yeeted, yote and attack helicopter-ed me out of the situation.

I'm still deciding now if that was a good thing, sure I'm not near them anymore, they can't use their words to trigger and cut through me while I just have to sit there and explain why my psychiatrist said I needed anxiety meds again, but a whole lot of good that did me because it has been 2 hours and now to scared to go back home. Fucking Fuck.

At first I just ran, down the driveway and onto the street, turning any corner that would put distance between me and that house, but after more then 4 miles when I had calmed down to a walk and started to think straight... well as straight as a gay like me can try, hehe..

The thought of turning around and going back there, just to get yelled at for running and questioned more about the previous conversation, the thought of that seemed less then appealing then sucking dick.

I had never gone this far before, I didn't know what to do, I even forgot my shoes, though you can't blame me because I just sped straight out without thinking but now the pain in my feet from walking on the course, rocky tar of the road made my feet feel like they were walking on hot coals, or worse...sharp needles.

"Ow, Shit" I cursed into the the night, maybe I shouldn't think about it anymore. Ugh Cringe...

I sit down in front of someone's dark house to give my feet a break. Swiping my black fringe back so I can look up.
It is pitch black and I can barely see the end of the street I'm on, the cars and houses dark shapes against the black and grey world. This is what people look like in the day time to me and all the other people who haven't found their soulmate. I try not to think about it, soulmates.

Some people never find theirs and see humans in black and white for their whole lives, asking what colour their friends shirt is if they need to know. You would think the world would look weird if everything other then humans were colourful, but I didn't care.

Being 16 years old, everyone in my grade was obsessive with the topic. They wanted to find their soulmate and experience the first sighting, which is when you look at your soulmate for the first time and your souls finally connect and you see each other in colour and everyone around you in colour for the first time.

It's not like I don't believe in soulmates, but if I doubt I would ever meet mine with the luck I have.

I would probably leave them anyway so they can date someone better.

Who in their right mind would love me and the huge fucking baggage that comes with me. Even though my parents say they are supportive of me being gay, they tend to ignore it whenever I say something towards that topic and don't like talking about it in a conversation. I hate it.

At least it isn't cold tonight, I wonder if I will become homeless and starve to death under a bridge if I never go home?

I'm walking on the side of the road now, my arms swinging. I don't want to think about the future, the thought of it makes my anxiety bubble up my throat, like a soda that chokes you from the inside. Yum bubbles,,, damn now I'm anxious and thirsty!

To calm myself down I start to talk to myself, singing words to the air and dark sky that nobody will hear because they are all asleep or in their houses watching television with their families, or making TickTocks in their room. My words coming straight from my core, unfiltered and unpolished but a good release.

"What will become of me,
What will faith befall, me...
Tear off my head again, so I can't hear your etiquette.
Lemon boy is dead again and all hope is gone again,
When will it come back..."

A/N
Sup...First chapter done and posted, the next chapter will include Sky, so don't stop reading and save this book! I will post it once I have finished editing it, so in about 1 or 2 days! Depending on how much people like this chapter. - Sequel xo