Broken // Tom Hiddleston Fan Fiction

Chapter Eight

Then...

As the weeks went on in our first term at Cambridge autumn began to arrive as the weather got cooler and the leaves began to orange in colour. I continued to keep my secret from Tom but it was effecting me. Everyday I would spend so much time with Tom whilst I knew that he did not share the same feelings for me that I shared for him. The man was like a God, why would he like me as any more than friends.

It wasn't until I received some test results back that I began to see that it was now effecting my grades too.

"Holly, can you stay behind after class" Professor Taylor asked me as he handed me my paper back. I looked down and was shocked to see 34% scribbled in the top corner. I was failing and it was because I was so distracted.

"Holly, I wanted to speak to you to see if everything was okay" Professor Taylor asked me as I approached his desk at the end of class.

"Yes everything is fine Professor. I don't really understand why I did so badly in that test and I will certainly do better in the next one" I stuttered.

"It's not just that test Holly, I have noticed that some of the grades on recent assignments are low too. If you don't start to improve your grades, I'm afraid that we may not be able to take you back for your second year." He replied.

I felt a tear begin to fall down my cheek. This was all I had ever wanted, to come to Cambridge and study law and now I was failing at that.

"Of course none of us want that to happen so I wanted to speak to you today to see how we can help. Is it extra tuition you need?" He asked.

I shook my head. I knew exactly what it was that I needed to do. I brushed away my tears and looked at Professor Taylor.

"Thank you but I will be okay. I just have some personal issues at the moment but I will get those sorted as soon as possible and then I will be able to focus one hundred percent on my studies." I replied.

Professor Taylor looked at me with concern.

"Well you know where I am if you do need any help and I look forward to seeing improved grades on your next assessment" he said as he began to pack his bag with his belongings from his desk.

"Thanks Professor. I will see you tomorrow." I replied turning to leave the room.

Tom was waiting for me outside the classroom a wide smile on his face. At the sight of him I felt my eyes begin to fill with tears. I couldn't bare for him to see me this way so before I could stop myself I started running. I could hear his footsteps behind me as he tried to catch up with me. My vision was cloudy with my tears as I ran across campus to my room. Everyone I passed stopped and stared. It must have been quite a sight. A crying girl running across campus being followed by a tall guy.

I heard Tom shout my name a couple of times, asking me to stop but I kept going and Tom continued to follow. It was only as I reached my room that I finally stopped running and climbed into my bed fully clothed and threw my head into my pillow as my sobs continued.

I heard Tom arrive, his breath heavy from running across campus after me. I felt the edge of my bed sink as he sat down beside me and took my hands in his. He didn't say anything but just held my hand allowing me to cry. I had to tell him how I felt but I knew I was going to lose him. How could he possibly feel the same way. I was just going to scare him away.

I eventually managed to control my crying and managed to lift my head from the pillow to look Tom in the eyes for the first time. The smile had now gone and his face was just full of concern.

"What's wrong Hols?" He asked quietly.

"I'm failing Tom." I replied. "If my grades don't improve soon, I may not be allowed to come back next year."

"How can you be failing?" Tom asked shocked. "You are always working so hard. The number of hours we spend together in this room studying."

I took a big sigh. It had to be now. I had to tell him.

"I'm distracted Tom." I replied.

"What do you mean distracted?" Tom asked confused. "Do you need me to leave you alone to give you time to study."

I shook my head. "I would still be distracted even if you weren't here Tom."

I could see Tom didn't understand what I was saying at all.

"Even if you weren't here Tom, I would still be thinking about you. You are always on my mind. I love you Tom." I said feeling my heart racing as I said the words.

"I love you too Hols, you know that. You are my best friend" Tom replied.

I couldn't help but laugh just from the awkwardness of the situation.

"No Tom" I said. "I am in love with you."

I watched as the realisation appeared on Tom's face. His eyes were wide open staring at me. His mouth slightly open. I could feel my face burning from my confession and all I wanted to do was to get Tom's reaction. After what felt like hours but was probably only a few seconds Tom finally spoke.

"Oh."