~*~*ON HOLD!!! EDITING!!!~*~*Hold on Till May(Michael Clifford Fanfic)

I Said I'd Never Let You Go, and I Never Did

~*~*~*Author's note at the end =)~*~*~*

As soon I stepped onto the bottom step I was confronted by Ashton. "What took you so long? I thought you were just going to change." He curiously asked. I glanced up at him but dropped my gaze when I saw the intense look in his eyes. "I told you I was changing but I also got sidetracked with checking tumblr." I plastered on a fake smirk while my insides were churning from lying to him. Out of the 4, Ashton was the hardest one to lie to. Maybe it was the dimples and soft hazel eyes, maybe it was the intense look he gives when he's worried, or maybe it was the simple fact that he too used to self harm. I have yet to figure it out, which is probably a good thing. I chanced a glance at him to see his gaze falter before he finally sighed and said 'okay' and dropped it. I followed him to the living room to see Calum, sitting in one of the recliners, with an intense look on his face while staring at the screen. “Mate where did you go? You left me to fight off those two bimbos by myself!” He called out to Ashton when he sat down in the other recliner. “Sorry I was checking on Melody, since Mike here got caught in fire of bullets.” Ashton replied with a quirky smile and his signature giggle when he saw me shaking my head. Luke was sitting on the one of the many bean bags I had around the house yelling at Michael. Speaking of Michael, he was perched on the couch behind Luke. He caught me watching him and gave me a smile followed by him sticking his tongue out. “Love you Mel!” he called out while turning his attention back to the game. I just laughed and told him ‘I love him too’. I turned and made my way to the kitchen to find something to snack on and drink. While rummaging around the sting coming from my leg made me think of the cause of my relapse:

The boys knew of my habit after I started dating Michael about 6 months ago, but they thought I had stopped. Well truth be told I had, but after they started getting more attention from touring with One Direction; it kinda just came back. It started with bits of hate messages on tumblr and twitter, then some remarks from fans in public about how Michael could do better, and lastly the trends that came up on twitter. Michael always assured me that it was all just bullshit and to ignore the childish antics. I tried ignoring even giving up my phone and laptop for a week, but the comments were still in the back of mind nagging me. So I just resorted to my old dirty habit and here I am now.

  After locating a cheese stick and water bottle I went back to the living room and plopped down beside Michael on the couch. "Hey babe." He said while giving me a quick peck on the cheek. I rolled my eyes and looked at the screen to see him and Luke not surprisingly beating Calum and Ashton. I reached across Michael and grabbed his phone. After 5 minutes of taking selfies and repeatedly dying on Temple Run, I tossed his phone to the side and huffed out a sigh. I’m pretty sure if it could really happen than a little light bulb would’ve just lit up over my head. Smirking to myself, I reach up and run my fingers through his pink hair. "Not now Mel. We're on a roll." He lightly pushed my hand away. Pouting to myself, I decide to change tactics. I toss my water bottle on the floor along with the cheese stick wrapper and pushed myself closer to him.Feeling eyes on me, I look to my left to find Calum glancing at me with a smirk firmly on his lips and lightly shaking his head. Reaching up I place a small kiss on Michael's cheek only to duck away when he tries to push me away...again. Grinning to myself, I do it again except I add 4 quick pecks down his jaw bone to his neck. "Melody...please not right now we're so close to winning." He whined while trying to dodge away from me. His whole response just causing me to giggle and up my game. I maneuver around to where I'm sitting on my knees and making sure my shorts haven't slid up any, to keep my little issue hidden. I lean over and kiss his cheek again and slowly make way to the corner of his lips. I reach down and move one of his hands from the controller to my waist. I let a giggle when I hear him groan in annoyance. He pulls his hand from my waist and quickly gets back to trying to beat Calum, who was actually holding his own pretty well considering Ashton was just running around in circles and shooting random things. I grumble and decide enough was enough. I grab his chin and force him to face him. He gives me a glare which I return with a smirk before I place my lips on his. He tries to pull away but I bunch his shirt up in my fist, that in turn causes him to drop the controller and pull me closer to him. I giggle into the kiss as the guys start flipping out. "What the fuck Michael?!?! We were so fucking close mate!!!" Luke all but screams out. "Holy hell Ashton we won!!! Well I mainly won but still. Thank you Melody." Calum cheers. All I hear from Ashton is his laughter. Pulling away I bite the corner of my lip as Michael is glaring at me playfully. I stick my tongue out in reply and turn around, mindful again of my shorts, and sit in his now free lap. I look around the room to see a fuming and pouting Luke, a very giggly Ashton who keeps shaking his head at me, and a very celebratory Calum who grabs my hand and forces me to high five him. Turning my attention back to Michael, who now has his arms wrapped around me and is smirking at me. "You are way too clever for your own good you know that right?" He raises an eyebrow in question. I just giggle again and nuzzle into his chest. I feel the couch dip slightly and look up to see Luke sitting there. I lightly nudge his leg with my foot in attempt to get his attention. "Yes Melody?" I bite my lip at his tone and I feel Michael stiffen. "I'm sorry Luke..." I reply in a small voice. He glances over at me. For the most sensible and quietest one of the group, Luke also had the biggest temper sometimes even at the smallest things such as losing a video game. He nods his head once at me, "just please next time we're playing try to hold off till we've won." he replies with a small smirk. I nod my head vigorously and open my arms for a hug. He ignores me until I start nudging his leg repeatedly, and finally breaks into a smile and reaches over to hug me. When he pulls away I sheepishly ask if he can hand me my water bottle. He rolls his eyes but complies none the less. We all sit there in silence watching TV, well more or less Michael and I are watching the other three argue over what to watch. I can feel Michael's hand rubbing up and down my leg and I mentally beg him NOT to go any higher. This was the major issue I had with dating Michael and self harming on my thighs. He was a touchy person and I knew I had hurt him more than once by pulling away when we were laying in bed or on the couch like now. Only problem was if I pulled away now the others would notice and that was one thing I really didn't want to do deal with because it would most likely cause a small scene. Unfortunately luck wasn't on my side as I felt his hand stop on my thigh right where the bandage was. He gave it a small squeeze which caused me to intake a sharp breathe. I could feel his green eyes staring intently at me. The bile started rising up as my insides started churning and the panic set in. I quickly pushed myself out of his grip, almost tripping over my own feet as my vision blurred. "Melody, what's wrong?" "Michael what did you do to her this time?" "You guys alright?" questions from the guys kept coming as I raced up the stairs. I could feel the knot forming in my throat and I knew I needed to get away from them, especially Michael, for a bit. I ran into the my room heading start for my en suite; throwing the door only to slam it shut seconds later as I sank to the floor. I pulled my knees up and pulled the leg of my shorts up. I lightly traced the trail of blood on the bandage, carefully adding pressure till I could numbly feel the pain. I was forcefully yanked from my little own numbness as the door was thrown open. Jumping when I saw Michael standing there. "Melody...I...I thought you had quit..." He stammered out. I dropped my head and shrank into myself as the pain and hurt dripped from every word he spoke. Pulling my knees closer to my chest, I turned myself away from him as the tears finally broke free. I faintly heard the door shut and felt Michael wrap his arms around me. He started humming Absolutely(Story of a Girl) by Nine Days. I couldn't help but smile as he lightly sang "I absolutely love her when she smiles." "I love you too." I whispered through the tears. We sat in a tangle of limbs as he lightly rubbed small circles on my back while humming the rest of the song. He cleared his throat causing me to look up at him; he gave me a sad smile and asked the big question I was dreading from him. "Why? Why did you start again?" I swallowed against the lump in my throat, took a deep breathe, and told him about the hate, the fans, and the tweets and messages. He pulled me tighter against him and peppered the side of my head in small kisses. "I’m going to take care of it the best I can, but right now I want you to deactivate your account or make it private or something till we get all this straightened out and please please try to stop for me at least. I love you Melody and I hate seeing you like this." I could feel the tears pricking and stinging my eyes. "I'll try. I make no promises but I will try." I let out a small whisper. "We made it through the last time, we can get through it this time as well." He hugged me against his chest and kissed my forehead. We eventually stood up and made our way into the bedroom. I crawled onto the bed first with Michael behind me. He wrapped his arm around my waist, kissed my cheek, and whispered in my ear "I love to the moon and back and we'll get through this together my Melody." I smiled and whispered back "I love you too Mikey."

~*~*~*A/N: Reminder this was orinigally written when I was having major MAJOR Michael feels at like 2 in the morning and I couldn't sleep. So this is the cleaned up version o.o. I think I fixed all the misspellings, grammer errors, and left out words. I also added some and took out some. I will hopefully have part 2 up tomorrow or Monday at the latest. I'm also hoping to get part 3 up as well. We'll see how that goes... O.O. The chapter title is from Have Faith In Me by A Day To Remember. Please leave feed back, comments, and don't forget to vote if you like it. This is still my first attempt at writing fanfiction. Thank You's in advance =)~*~*~*

P.S. If the spacing looks funky, I'm sorry. I have absolutely no idea on what happened when I transferred this over from my Microsoft Word. I'm sorry =(.