𝘀𝗺𝗶𝗹𝗲𝘀

↠ chapter four

ᴍᴀᴄᴋᴇɴᴢɪᴇ ᴢɪᴇɢʟᴇʀ

im putting my head down the rest of maths. it stung seeing johnny like that. and with her? the girl that literally harassed me. it might be a coincidence that she was wearing DocMartens  but i have a gut feeling it's more than that. i don't understand why. honestly thank god the teacher hasn't asked me to introduce myself because i do not need that attention right now.

"nadiaaa" i hear one of the red-heads blonde bimbos say. nadia  (who i've just learnt is the red-heads name) groans into the kiss before turning her head. "what ruby?!".  "stop that you cannot get another detention!" "i don't care" nadia shrugged. "do you care john-john?" she asks sweetly and john peeks at me before shaking his head vigorously and going back to sucking nadias face off.

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ᴊᴏʜɴɴʏ ᴏʀʟᴀɴᴅᴏ
2nd and this period went just like 1st period. nadia making out with me whilst i kept on side-glancing at kenzie. in her eyes i saw a flash of hurt before she went emotionless. if you asked me why i'm with nadia. honestly?i can't really tell you. it's complicated but all i can say for now is that i'd rather go to school 365 days a year than date nadia turner.

ᴍᴀᴄᴋᴇɴᴢɪᴇ ᴢɪᴇɢʟᴇʀ
hurt was all i was feeling. i don't understand why. it's just johnny he's like any other guy i've met so why is he different? why is he making me feel this way? wha— the bell for lunch rings. i pack up my notebook and my pencil case and start to head out the door. i'm emo i literally haven't had any lessons with lolo yet and i've only talked to one person and his name is mandla.

i see lauren and i catch up to her and we start talking about my first day. "it's been good this morning was a bit of a shaky start and honestly i wasn't looking forward to the rest of the day but it improved as the day carried on. i introduced myself a lot and people stared a lot.it was kind of intimidating & scary. " i rant to lauren. we reach the cafeteria and it's the most crucial decision to make when in high school. where to sit. it's a real thing! i trail lolo and she seems to be headed for the "cool table". with johnny , nadia and her minions , some other guys i don't recognise and some girls with their arms linked to the guys.

ʟᴀᴜʀᴇɴ ᴏʀʟᴀɴᴅᴏ

kenzie and i walked over to the squad and i could see out of the corner of my eye how nervous she is. i grab her hand and squeeze it. we take a seat and everyone greets me then hayden finally asks "so who's this?" "hi i'm mackenzie but you guys can call me kenzie or kenz" kenzie smiles warmly as everyone introduce themselves.
"yo i'm carson "
"i'm hayden"
"hi i'm annie"
"i'm laur duh" kenzie laughs
"i'm ruby" she says emotionless
"brynn" she says as she rolls her eyes
"i'm ashton" he winked. what a flirt.
"i'm conner"
"i'm jayden!"
"and i'm nadia" she sneered as she rolled her eyes to the literal back of her head. what's her deal? i've never seen nadia , brynn or ruby act like this. weird.

ᴍᴀᴄᴋᴇɴᴢɪᴇ ᴢɪᴇɢʟᴇʀ

i'm happy i have new friends now. i get my lunch box out and as i'm about to get my food out my phone vibrates.

unknown
*** *** ***** **
you sure you wanna eat ALL of that?
i mean even you can admit you're a plump
bye fatty x

my heart stops. i've experienced this type of stuff before but never like this. for some reason these words hit me hard. i stood up leaving my bags there only grabbing my phone ignoring lolo and annie's calls. i go round the back of the school to get some fresh air. i start hyperventilating and struggling to breathe. i get this a lot & it's the worst feeling. feeling like you're worthless. not needed. i focus on my breathing and try to relax myself. think of something good. on the beach. playing my ukulele. looking out to the sea. once i've calmed down i walk back into the cafeteria with a smile on but teary eyes. lolo stares at me as i sit down and start to poke at the salad i packed. "hey" she says softly "you okay?"i nod whilst smiling. the worst bit is that i feel it's only going to get worse from here.

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melissa speaks...☏
guess who has a new book planned for 2020? this girl 😌
i can't wait for you guys to see my writing better and improved :)
UPDATE : HAPPY NEW YEAR's EVE :)