Reel Se Real Takk... (SidRa reuploaded)

The show must go on...

The premier night went on up until all the men finally were ready to enter the BB house. Celebrities came and went into the house, jokes happened, challenges were made and while everyone was trying to analyse all their fellow contestants sid was onto some different train of thought. You guessed it right. SHARING A BED. Sure he was going along the flow and seemed very present in the moment but a part of his mind was contemplating his journey ahead in that house. Who could blame him though? Tell me one person who won't be fazed by the fact that they're gonna have to sleep right next to the past that has kept them up several nights even when they were miles apart and hadn't talked much in ages.

SID'S POV

As we were escorted by the bb team to the house entrance I was steeling myself for what might occur on the other side of that house. Knowing myself and my luck, I know I will make some friends and some enemies. There will be some fights and some compromises and most definitely a lot of kitchen work as everyone on kitchen duty had picked me. And that right there was the burning question #1 of that day. 'why did rash pick me? Is she so unfazed by me?' I thought to myself as I thought back on that entire segment with her on stage. Kuch cheezein aur unka humpe asar kabhi nahi badalta. I recalled how the host asked us about the one habit we each must refrain from showing in the house with respect to the other since we had worked together for a year. To which I was fairly quick to answer, 'rash ki muh pe sach bolne ki aadat.' Muh par sach toh bolti hi hai ya phir should I say bolti thi. Bina kuch soche, samjhe ki samne wale ko woh sach sehen bhi hoga ya nahi bas bol do aur itna bhi nahi ki kisi aur ke point of view se sach jaan aur samajh le. Har sikkey ke 2 pehlu hotey hai par inhe toh sirf ek hi nazar aata tha. Isi wajah se toh aadhey problems hue thhey saare.

The thing that was bothering me the most even after reminiscing the past and all that went down was that usi same sawal ka jawab dete hue rash ne yeh kaha ke aadatein toh abb saath reh ke pata chalegi ghar mein. Kya matlab hua iska? All that time we spent together woh sab, kuch bhi nahi? Kuch yaad takk nahi? Ke abb meri koi buri aadat bhi yaad rakhne layak nahi rahi? Waise toh meri kitni saari baatein kharab lagti thi ussey.shayad waqt ke saath itni bhi sachhi nahi rahi tum rash.

To add to all of this I had a yellow band in my hand which felt as good as phaasi ka phanda to me which indicated that we're gonna be sharing a bed for atleast some time. I looked at the yellow band once more before taking in the huge fortified walls and the grand gate of the bb house which was clearly visible from afar. The house was now a 3 minuite walk away from us. Isn't yellow the colour of friendship if I'm not wrong? So what? Is this a hint that bb wants us to be friends over the course of the show? Arrey BB war ke baad dosti karne ke pehle aman ka white colour lehrana padta hai. Yaha toh hum dono abhi bhi past ke andheron se bhaag rahe hai, pehle thoda sukun, thodi shanti toh milne dete. Phir shayad dosti ho paati. In haalaton mein dosti nahi bas aur ek jang hi hogi. Aur mera sabse bada darr yahi hai ki shayad iss gussey mein mai koi past ki aisi baat na bol doo jo sabke samne bolne se pehle 10 baar sochna chahiye.

Taking in a deep breath, I stepped into the house along with my fellow male contestants. We all walked in greeting each other, reintroducing each other. I walked towards the bedroom, I could see a sleeping rash now quickly jumping to her feet, greeting everyone that was entering the room, shaking their hands. Finally, we stood against each other. For a moment, a really brief one I felt like time had slowed down as she walked towards me in slow motion. This woman will always have this effect on me I guess. Soon I snapped out of the phase and jumped into the reality, a reality where rash and I were nothing but 2 people who knew each other from past work experience. And the easiest way to hide my nerves right now seemed to be making useless conversion. We high fived each other and I asked her " kya karenge hum kitchen ka. Khana kaise banayege?" "mujhey aata hai mai kar lungi. Tu bas help kar de." Was all she said as she greeted the rest. Isko khana banana aata hai? yeh chamatkaar kab hua? Shayad mai sach mein isko sahi se jaan hi nahi saka life mein. But sabse mazey ki baat batau kyat thi? It was that she was so affected by the fact that we were gonna have to share a bed. Come on now I'm only human. Aur kisko achha nai lagta their ex getting affected by them being around. Thoda toh phark padta hai isko. Chahe kitna bhi judge kar lo mujhey iss baat ke liye, usko yuh stressed dekh kar mujhey bada sukoon mil raha tha.

RASH'S POV

This sid. He was right there on my nerves the moment he got into the house. No hi, helloes. No how are yous? All he could come up with was a high five followed by " kya karenge hum kitchen ka. Khana kaise banayege?" heh? Kya mahan insaan hai yeh itna bhi nahi janta I know how to cook! "mujhey aata hai mai kar lungi. Tu bas help kar de." Maine bhi itna bolke baat khatam kar di. Mann toh karr raha tha wahi ke wahi suna du, itne time se jante ho mujhey yeh bhi nahi pata tujhey? Haan waise kya hi pata hoga tumhey kabhi dhyaan dete mujhpe, meri sahi se sunte toh pata hota na. par. Tumhe toh apne alawa koi aur dikhta hi nahi hai. 'chhod de rash, yu yeh sab bolne ka aur jataane ka hakk tu kabka kho chuki hai' and with this thought I moved my focus onto a more pressing issue. "bed ka kya karna hai? Separate karenge na hum baad mein?" I asked as I looked at him with expectant eyes. He took a moment to think, I could tell that he was bothered by it too. Itna toh mai janti hu tumhe ki kuch had takk tumhein padh sakoon. He looked at my worried face and soon there was that annoying, lopsided smirk that I hate a lot on his face. "kar lenge yaar kuch. Bb ka order hai follow toh karna padega." Bolke he went on to wherever the hell he went.

So abb sid enjoy karr raha hai mujhey aise dekh ke. Jokes on you sid, itni satisfaction toh mai dene se rahi tumhe. Itni bhi koi badi baat nahi hai. Hai kaun yeh sid? He is just another contestant this season. Indifference rash, indifference. Focus. Time passed everyone settled into the house and engaged in conversations. For most of this part sid and I steered clear of each other to which I couldn't be more thankful. As it got closer to bed time I got more anxious. Finally I chose to take things in my hand and not let something so petty affect me. I went straight to the bed and built a wall of pillows between the bed and slept on one side of it all cuddled up into the blanket. Chalo ek din toh kaat liya maine jaise taise. Soon enough sid came and crawled into the bed on the ohter side of the bed and settled in for the night.

As I lay in bed I played my entire day in my head. Jitna kuch itney mahinon mein maine feel aur face nahi kiya hoga ussey bahot jyada maine kuchh ghaton mein kar liya tha. Koi baat nahi hai, sabke life mein challenges aatey hai, and who knows maybe I will finally completely be over him by the end of this. Waise abhi koi bahot khaas si attachment nahi bachi hai. It's just that some knots take longer to detangle. I looked over the wall of pillows between us. It was so symbolic, this wall of pillows between us. Just like the invisible wall that stood between sid and I in the past and even today.this wall I guess was taller than I thought. I failed to cross it. Or maybe I failed because I was the only one trying to cross it. Sid ne toh shayad wall ko dekhte hi decide kar liay key eh toh kabhihatt nahi payegi hamare beech se.

Love is a two way street. It's very important to understand and trust each other for it to work. Aur aise nahi haiki maine kabhi koshish hi nahi ki to understand his poit of view. Par kuch koshish usne bhi karni thi agar deewar cross karne mein madat karta tabhi toh baat ho paati na. yahan toh koshishkarna toh door meri koshishon kokabhi shayad usne notice hi nahi kiya. Bass anjaan raha meri har koshish se, mere har pehlu se sid. Shayad hum sikkey ke do pehluon ki tarah hi hai, saath toh hamesha honge par hamesha ek doosre se anjaan, paas hoke bhi, ek hi industry mein, sheher mein aura bb toh ek hi ghar mein hote hue bhi ek dusrein se meelon door.

But as they say, the show must go on. Nothing is going to stop because of what happened in the past. Not even sid. So why should I stop. I'm here for the game. For my career. I know it's going to be a bumpy ride especially with so many contrasting personalities in the house. Bass chaahein kuch bhi ho koi kuch bhi bole, phir chahe who sid hi kyu nah o, mai iss game mein koi personal baat nahi karungi khaas karke who jo mere past se judi ho. Nah bilkul bhi nahi. Tomorrow, please be good to me. 

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