black holes.

sudden loss of light

yugyeom was confused.

very confused.

he was drunk, really fucking drunk, and his head was starting to hurt because he was chain-smoking and blowing out smoke through his nose.

the world around him was blurry, dim, hazy, and people kept blending into the pale blue color of the pool and the yellow lights of the windows that flashed over their bodies.

everything was looking distorted through his view and bambam's voice kept sounding like there was an underlining cut of anger flowing through his words.

"i guess," yugyeom spoke out through another cloud of smoke. smoke, smoke, smoke, bambam, bambam, bambam.

"i mean," yugyeom went on when bambam said nothing. "he was fun to talk with. he likes spiderman and the ending of endgame killed him. we were bonding over that."

bambam was still not looking at him, and it was actually starting to piss yugyeom off.

because bambam had been skipping art class, had been sneaking into dark copy room machines and texting angrily with his thumbs. because bambam had gone on a date with a girl and had told yugyeom i don't really roll her way and it was making yugyeom feel something horrible – it made him feel hope.

"he was going on about something, but i was kind of too drunk and he was smoking weed so i stopped paying attention. you know, he's kind of distracting to look at." not as distracting as you though.

bambam's body was tense, his jaw clenched in a way that yugyeom could trace the vein that bulged out from his delicate neck.

"i know, you guys were standing so close that anyone would have thought you two were a thing."

yugyeom blinked. "a – a thing?"

bambam rolled his eyes in annoyance, turning to glare at yugyeom lazily. there was nothing playful in his voice when he said, "yes yugyeom. a thing. boyfriend. dating. being gay. i thought you two had run off to make out."

yugyeom licked his lips, his tongue feeling heavy. see here, the thing was yugyeom was kind of gay. or maybe really gay. he's not sure.

he's never really thought about it, he's grown up with a bisexual brother, has met some of jaebum's boyfriends (some who were really good looking).

jackson has been pretty open about his sexuality from a very young age and jinyoung was really gay for jackson.

jungkook was also bisexual and had come out to yugyeom their freshman year. so he's been around plenty of not so straight people most of his life, and it lead to him never thinking much about his own sexuality.

(he's always been in love with bambam also. bambam who makes yugyeom feel so many things that it becomes overwhelming to even think about him. bambam, the boy yugyeom dreams about late at night – dreaming about being held in his arms until they crashed into one another's souls and became one.)

what he's trying to get at, is that no one has ever explicitly said, you're gay. bambam had said that people were thinking soonyoung and him were a thing. he'd spilled it out causally, like as if it were a fact that yugyeom was into boys. that made him feel a bit nervous.

had bambam found out about his weird crush on him?