Eddsworld Oneshots {OLD}

Soliel x Patryk |Sleeping Hags|

Requested by guccicarbon

Soliel P.O.V.

I was strapped to a chair. I was held hostage by the Yellow Leader because I, 'tried to take over Dirdum Lane and even the world'. I wouldn't give myself THAT much credit. I mean, I manipulated some people into doing what I wanted, and maybe killed a few people, that doesn't mean I'm a villain. My mouth wasn't covered so I could have screamed for help at any time. But I didn't. You know why? Because I was interrupted by two Red Army men busting down the door.

Paul P.O.V.

We needed new recruits for our Red Army, since it was just me, Patryk, and Red Leader. On the news we saw this rouge girl causing havoc around Dirdum Lane. We decided to follow the kidnappers and kidnap the already kidnapped girl. (That's a lot of kidnaps XD) We found the room she was stored and kicked down the door. She jumped slightly at our loud and dramatic entrance. The girl had tan skin with freckles scattered around her cheeks. She had long brown hair and amber eyes. I waited for Patryk's instruction but it never came. I looked over at him and noticed him staring at the female. I smacked the back of his head and he snapped out of it.

"U-Uh.. You're coming with us."

"Says who?" She sassed.

"Us." I sassed back. Patryk grabbed the chair and lifted it. We carried the girl out of the Yellow Army's base and back to ours. Then, we interrogated.

"JOIN THE RED ARMY." I barked. Patryk stared at me with an: 'I'll-do-the-talking' look.

"We need you for our army."

"And why should I do that?"

"We have a leader with an eye-patch?"

"I'M SOLD"

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Patryk P.O.V.

Me, Paul, and that girl were walking to our barracks when I decided to actually ask for her name.

"What's your name?"

"Soliel." She responded. Huh, cute. I blushed at my thought and looked away. Paul nudged me.

"Can it Paul!" I whispered. He just gave me a really smug look. We arrived at the barracks and I sat on my small mattress.

"Red Leader needs better sleeping arrangements." Paul commented. I chuckled.

"Damn right. Who's she sleeping with?"

"Hmm.. You." I blushed. I saw what he was doing. The bastard. Soliel's eyes widened at the thought.

"Paul!" I whined.

"What? Don't wanna sleep with a GIIIRRRLLL?" Paul said letting the word 'girl' drag on for a while. Just as I was going to respond, the announcements turned on.

"ATTENTION, WING-HAIR AND EYEBROWS REPORT TO MY OFFICE WITH THE GIRL."

I groaned and grabbed Soliel's hand. Paul wiggled his OVER-SIZED eyebrows. I took a very sharp inhale and flipped Paul a bridie. Paul chuckled and followed us anyway.

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I knocked on the door of the Red Leader's office. His anime maid-lady opened it for us.

"Thank you Mey-Rin (HEHEHEH BLACK BUTLER)." Red Leader said lighting his cigar.

"You called Red Leader?"

"I heard you talking about the sleeping arrangements," OH SHIT HE HAS CAMERAS "And I shall assign them for you. Paul, you sleep with Duder while Patryk you sleep with the new girl." BUUUUHHH

"I don't mean to be rude but, who is Duder? Is he new?"

"It's a female and yes." Red Leader replied with a snap. Duder opened the door and ran next to Red Leader.

"You called sir?"

"Meet your new, 'Roommates'." Duder stared at us for a second.

"Two of them are men."

"Ahuh. Roommates. Now if you'll excuse me, me and Mey-Rin have some, 'important business' to attend to." Red Leader said pushing us out of his office. He winked at Mey-Rin. He shoved all of us out of his office. We all walked to the barracks again and the girls made themselves at home. Duder had this blow up sleeping bag that you press a button on the side and it turns into a portable mattress. Soliel on the other hand, had to sleep on the same tiny mattress as me. YAY LUCK. It was 2100 hours (Or 9:00pm for those non-military peeps) and it was time for bed. I shifted to the edge of the mattress so Soliel could climb in with me. Paul slept on his disgusting mattress even though Duder offered her super nice and clean one to him.

Soliel P.O.V.

I was starting to like this 'Patryk' guy. I had to sleep with him after all. Their Red Leader was a pretty cool dude and Duder didn't seem so bad. I tried to make the most of my limited space and get comfy. After a few minutes, I felt arms wrap around me. I turned my head to see Patryk fast asleep using me as a teddy bear. I didn't fight it and snuggled up to him. He was warm. I dozed off and eventually fell fast asleep.

WOOOOOOOOOWEEEEEEE