Chapter 1 - Meet the Golden Spoon

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The first person to shake me out of my otherwise monotonous life started, as it usually did, with Parker's incessant chatter. I meant narrative.

"The school bell rang," he began with an optimistic grin, stretching his arms out as we started filing out of class, "signalling the final break of the day. Students filled the halls in a dynamic scene of anticipatory unrest. Bumping and prodding into one another as they each vied for the best view at the front gate."

He had a propensity for narrating particularly unremarkable school gossip–for lack of better excitement. Boy kiss girl, girl kiss boy, girl kiss girl...

Well, you get the idea.

"Rumours had it Shalom High was getting a Golden Spoon," he said, dramatizing his voice like an A-grade thespian. He shuffled through his pocket for his trusty Dictaphone and held it in front of my face. I noticed that there was no visible red light to show if the bloody thing was even on.

It took every shred of my patience not to knock it to the floor.

"And what is this 'Golden Spoon', you might ask?" he then paused, blinking rapidly when I emphatically said nothing. Undeterred, he merely continued: "It is a silver spoon born of royal blood. A spoon which surpasses every known subject, every known sport, and basks in every one of life's delights. Every parent loves the golden spoon, every man admires it, and every woman desires it. Favoured by the gods themselves, though this one is purely just conjecture. Above all, he is one who sits on the throne of thrones above all silver spoons and all of their subjects."

We arrived in front of the windows that overlooked the school's driveway entrance. There was a flashy black car like the ones you see on TV pulling in. Parker noticed too; his eyes lit with the same exhilaration as the rest of the masses rushing to witness its entry. The car looked like it had tinted windows, but it might have been the glare.

Knowing he was still ninety-nine percent likely to continue, I rolled my eyes, ready to silence the lamb. Then lo-and-behold...

"And, as a black Mercedes S-Class pulls into the yard, we see that today marks the very special arrival of Shalom's brand-new golden spoon, Kens––Ow!"

"Can you shut it already?" I finally snapped, elbowing Parker's ribs.

Right at this moment, we were ambling along too close behind the crowds. It was fortunate that everybody was racing to follow the commotion outside since it meant we had first dibs on lunch at the cafeteria. From where we stood at the third-floor window, I had a clear view of said Golden Spoon stepping out from the car. While I had no particular interest in him, even I couldn't quite look away.

"You know, that was excessive even for you," Parker grumbled, rubbing the side I'd hit.

"If I have to hear that godforsaken name once more, I will do worse."

He broke into a sly grin. "Whose name? You mean Kensing––Ow!"

I elbowed him again. He cussed and continued rubbing the sore spot, undeterred.

"Kensington––Ow!"

"Put a cork in it. Do you think he'll appear in a mirror if you say his name enough times?"

Parker rolled his eyes. We continued down the stairs, trailing amongst hordes of bustling bodies. A few people brushed past me, resulting in Parker holding me steady. Some brushed past Parker, resulting in me holding him steady. This was quite normal. Every transfer generated a similar response from the entire student body, which was to be expected at this highly reputable private school. Although, I admit, this time was a little more excessive than most.

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