Apocryphal Family Tree: The Rough Draft

Lenny attends a Winnie Feast

Winnie one hundred percent stole this format from the Passover Seder after she'd heard about the ritual dinner in the early 1900s. She liked the idea of passing down the story of the family from generation to generation. Much like how Passover is different from generation to generation and family to family based on what needs to brought to the forefront, so is the Winnie Feast. However unlike Passover, which is to remind of the hardships and persecution, Feast is to be a celebration of triumphs and Black joys. And also a reminder that we still have a long way to freedom for all of us. The Feast of Winnie is also part of her wanting to be the saint of slavery. She noticed after the first feast that she got an extra juice to her workings. She didn't and still doesn't conjure, despite that definitely being part of where her power comes from, but her missions, which I now know are rescue missions, go better. Like the intentions she sets sail smoother after the Feast. I'm sure that at least in part of what made her think I'd be way more protected than I was. But I'm getting ahead of myself now. Side note: I have a feeling that once a Christian, always a Christian. I'm pretty sure that visiting family isn't the only reason there's a hardcoded door way to Heaven in her bedroom. And I'm sure the reason isn't one that she'd want her fellow Gate Crashers to know.
The format of the dinner is story between the courses and everyone that does or has called the Homestead home is welcome. Also before the Feast we perform a ritual to release the spirits that are attached to he land unwilling. You'd think after five generations that we'd have released all dead people tied to the land because this is where they died and they died terribly. But every year there are new spirits that have loosened their grip enough on their trauma that they can finally accept the peace we offer. I make a note that just because I don't detect a presence doesn't mean there isn't one and I just may need to look closer to find it. I could have been loosening spirits while I did this work if I'd known. I'm a little miffed at Nor for not mentioning this to me months ago. As usual I think of all the work I could have been doing. Like being more scheduled would have made my life better. I also make note that I can do this ritual to loosen the bonds of those I come across to help them cross over, if they want. Not all ghosts want it. And then there's whole rabbit hole of forcing ghosts to move on because they are causing harm.
After the ghost release ceremony we go inside. Everyone is dressed in blue. Dark blues, rich in color and feel. Most of the people have their hair done special. With blue threaded in their cornrows or braided into their hair or a headband or a hat or a head wrap. We all look beautiful decked out like royalty. Like deities.
My entire family is here for the first time. I'm reminded that I still need to bury the hatchet with my mom and dad as I see Bay and Sep try to take all of this in like me. The three siblings have all been prepping with Nor because we already feel like such outsiders in our own family because of the estrangement that we didn't also want to seem like we weren't interested in our family history which granted takes more time to absorb than the average American whose family doesn't host an annual family reunion on land that they once worked as slaves and now have changed and spiritually worked to make it a place of healing. Also this isn't my parents first time at the rodeo, though judging from Dad's rusty movements, even if it isn't your first rodeo, decades between rodeos that are still low number of rodeos means you don't know everything or even possibly enough. I probably shouldn't be trying to write this while I'm still wired and exhausted from the night. But also if I don't do this now, I'll put it off until it's been too long to properly catalog it. Nor hasn't written any of this process down. It's always passed from generation to generation, person to person. Usually woman to woman because we live in our own weird matriarchal bubble.
Before the first course, we all wash our hands. It's not ceremonial, it's practical, so it takes place at various sinks. Some kids run upstairs to the bathroom there and wash their hands to show how fast they can be. You can hear them giggling as their little feet stomp on the wood stairs. They sound like cute baby elephants, if elephants had human-like laughs.
We all wash our hands and sit. There are so many tables. A seat is saved for Winnie at the largest one. There used to only be one long table when this happened outside. This event doesn't happen outside anymore because of the mosquitoes and ticks. I sit. Normally the apprentice sits next to Winnie and leads. I like being in the background with my siblings. We all watch and there is a weird insular nature to our bond because it was forged so singularly from everyone else's. We all think this is weird and we're also drawn here, where it is home. My siblings have been staying at home for the summer but I've gone to get them every morning and bring them back home every night. Except when Sep has work. Then I ferry him back and forth on a different schedule than Bay. I wished that Winnie hadn't died and we were able to all sleep under the same roof. It's weird how much I miss them, even though I see them regularly. The phrase, "The days are long but the years are short" comes to mind because I can remember thinking the best thing in the world was freedom from my godsdamned siblings. But they get me in a way that I don't have to try. In a way that no one else does because our experience was so set apart from our tight knit family on my mother's side, from the white suburban community we lived in on the North Shore, from the Black Christian community my parents tried to keep us connected to.
While we wash our hands Nor recites a call for our ancestors to join us. I learned while I was in Heaven that they do hear these calls and they listen in, but they don't actually bring their presence here. Also this is like a scheduled call- it happens the same time every year so they can plan for and around it.
We pass around the first course. It's a bunch of chopped raw vegetables from the gardens. And bread. Cornbread. Drop biscuits. Cheddar drop biscuits. Sweet mountain bread rolls.
Nor speaks about the bounty and how Winnie is working to make that happen for more people. Second course is shrimp and grits. Nor talks about freedom and the struggle towards it. Third course is tomato pudding and collards and corn. Nor talks about what has happened this past year. We get two mentions our arrival and me being the apprentice. Really brings my whole story into perspective. Fourth course is fried fish and chicken and waffles. Nor invites Winnie into this space. Winnie shows up like she's been here the whole time but we all know she's walking out of a closet and that she's been in her room in her house until right this very moment. Fifth course is Low Country Boil, Winnie's favorite. With Winnie here, she tells her life story and answers children's questions. I have a few but I don't want to ask them here. Dessert is red velvet cake and peach cobbler and sweet potato pie and carrot cake. Why would anyone ever do such a mean thing to a cake and defile it with a carrot? It's rude.
As I'm contemplating the audacity of carrot cake, Winnie catches my eye and I know I'm in trouble. It could be for any number of things, but I'm pretty confident it's because of the snake and cat that stay in my room. Who knows how long she's been awake and I know better than to think I can keep anything secret or even private in her house, at lest when it comes to powerful magic and connections to it. I have a brief moment of sheer panic and when it passes I feel relief and clarity at knowing that something had been decided. Even though technically this job is one that I wouldn't be fired from, I still had panic attacks about that being the case. I think I know what's going to happen next now, I can read it on Winnie's face. I'm not going to be left alone at the house anymore. I'm going to tag along with her. Not sure why hat seems like a good idea, but I get the sense that Winnie is going to keep me closer because even though the saying is keep your friends close and your enemies closer, Winnie has never seemed like the type to worry about those who are not her family. And they can be your friends and your enemies and in this family, you can't escape them. We finish dinner and every starts to break down into smaller, open groups chatting. Before they leave I give my mom and dad hugs and kisses and tell them I will call them tomorrow. I open the portal and send my immediate family back home. I wish a few people goodbye, the ones who would suck their teeth and call me rude to my face and talk bad about my mom and dad for raising me without manners. There are only like five of 'em. And then I bounce too. I know Winnie will be busy until the early hours of tomorrow morning and I want to face her with a full night of sleep and preferably with a hot mug of tea.