~Izuku's POV~
Um, I Heard somewhere that writing how you feel could help you and make you feel better. So here I am. About to write whatever I feel once a week, until the Entrance exams. So here's the first one.
Week 1- I'm not sure how I feel. Telling Himiko, Dabi, Tomura, and Kuriguri my past helped a Little, but I still feel... I don't know, I guess... Empty? Is that the right word for it? I don't even know.
Week 2- Still confused! I'm confused and It makes me so frustrated! I hate not knowing why I feel this way!
Week 3- I am going to visit the Bakugo household tomorrow, it's katsuki's mom's birthday! Yay? I don't know why I'm still going over there, me and Katsuki aren't even friends anymore. And he's made that more than clear.
Week 3, the day after the last one- I am never going to Katsuki's house again. I never really went there much as a kid so that was my second time being there. They say so many bad words. I couldn't stand it. I'm never visiting them again.
Week 4- I've been having fewer Panic attacks recently. Yesterday Dabi said the f word and I only flinched, it's still a reaction to the word but at least I didn't freak out.
Also, I've never seen Dabi apologize so much before yesterday, he even made me a cake that said "I'm sowwy, Pwease forgwive mwe" it was so sweet of him. I, of course, forgave him, and I also ate the whole cake by myself. Yummy!Week 5- I still don't know what to feel. I'm thinking about going to the doctors, but I'm not sure if I want to or not. This could just be something stupid.
Week 6- I was so wrong. This Morning I accidentally burned myself with my lava lamp that's in my room. And I liked it, I liked the way the pain felt. I want to touch it again, but longer. I want to burn myself.
Week 7- I feel desolated, I feel blank, I feel unavailable, I feel unreachable, I feel bare, I feel... empty.
I did end up burning myself again, I started using only the hot water for showering, and I started washing my hands with hot water, sometimes I go too far and my hands turn red, but it's fine. I'm fine. I'm good. I'm... Excellent.Week 8- Tomorrow, the entrance exams are tomorrow. Shiggy told Ochako to "accidentally" trip while walking into the U.A building, and that whoever catches her, she has to make her friend, so she has somebody to trust her.
What she doesn't know is that I'll be the one to try and catch her, she'll think she's fooling me, but I'll be fooling her. Making sure she doesn't tell anyone about our deal.I sighed and Put the pencil I was using down onto my desk. "Done," I whispered before closing my journal and pulling out my phone.
"Hmm, I haven't been on Instagram in a while. Ooh, I could check my potential classmate's accounts." I mumbled and started searching for the different accounts while on my main account @deku.midoriya_izuku.Denki Kaminari- @dank.boi.denki.22:
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The Secret Villain | Villain;Deku
FanfictionIzuku hasn't had the best luck when it comes to almost everything. So when being color blind, Katsuki's bullying, being quirkless, and his favorite hero telling him he can't be a hero finally takes a toll on him he cracks starts feeling lost and bro...