Butter Cake

Valentine's Day

I cleaned my room and walked with Cara to the overcrowded hair salon.

"Hot dog, why is it so crowded in here? I thought all the black women were going natural. You don't need maintenance on a big ass ball of her hair, pick and go." I said opening the shop door. I was really salty because I couldn't have an afro. I wanted an afro. But my hair was too straight, it didn't look right. It looked as if I stuck my hand in an electrical socket. So I was here to get myself a regular press and curl.

I sat listening to Cara go on and on about New York, they were staying in some fancy hotel. I was happy for her but I didn't give a shit, about chocolate on a pillow. I was happy when the beautician called me to the bowl to wash my hair. I laid back and relaxed. The water started and it was cold. I normally didn't talk to washer or the stylists. Not because I didn't like them. I just wasn't a chatty girl.

"Can you turn up the hot water please." I asked nicely.

"You was at Nipsey's the other night right?" she asked. I didn't know this woman.

"No." I said. She looked relieved and she turned up the hot water, what a weirdo.

I was in the chair getting my hair curled when a shiny black corvette pulled up. The girl at the wash bowl shot me a look. I looked at her. She was about my color, shoulder length hair, she had waaaaay more hips than me, and she was probably about 20. The door shut, and this explained it all. Carter was here. I didn't say a word to him, and he, I don't think saw me. He went to her and wanted to talk with her outside.

"No, say it right here. You cancelling tonight." She said as if it happened frequently.

"That too, and I've been seeing someone else, we're pretty serious." He said. I paid my money and met Cara at the front of the store. She asked me about Carter, and I said nothing. I really wanted to be alone, I didn't want to talk to anyone but him.

"Sabrena!" I heard him call out from his car. I stopped walking and Cara stayed with me. I told her to go home. I got into his black stingray, and we sat in front of my house. He said he was there to break up with her.

"What if I wasn't in there? Would you have broken up with her? Or would you just have asked to see her later on." I asked calmly. He looked shocked I had asked that question. He was speechless for a few seconds.

"I like you, I told you that. I want us to be official. Yes I date other women, but you're the most important. Most of them I've known for a while. I don't want to be with anyone else. I just want you." He said with sad eyes.

"How am I supposed to know that it's not some other woman somewhere else? How am I supposed to know that every time I don't see you, you're not with some weird woman?" I asked kind of disgusted.

"Faith, that's what good relationships are built on. Trust and faith." He said.

"Carter, I'm mad right now. I don't want to go out tonight with you." I said getting out of his car. I entered the house and headed for the stairs.

"Sabrena! Was that Carter outside." My mother was saying more but I just wanted to go in my room and cry. I wanted to be mad with him, but my room was filled with balloons and flowers. He had my favorite candy neatly wrapped in red ribbons. I didn't want to be hurt. I didn't want to be left looking stupid. I didn't want him to think I was weak and that his word was all I needed to hear for me to believe whatever he said. I was seriously scared. He had been patient with me. But I wanted him to know I wasn't playing with him. If he cared like he said, he would be around when I wasn't mad any longer. "Sabrena, open the door. Carter wants to talk to you." My mom said. I opened my door.