We'll Be God

Alexithymia

Lincoln and Maggie had a wonderful time while at the mall. He helped Maggie shop and she helped Lincoln by showing him a good time. Since this might have been Lincoln's first time ditching school as well as finally being himself, she wanted to help Lincoln. Maggie didn't know why but she felt something for the boy. This was very uncommon to her. Why?

Well, you see many years ago when Maggie was a child around the age of six, her father died. Yet she felt no sadness. She knew her father died, but she didn't understand it she had asked herself why was it sad? why was it so bad that he died? But Maggie asked herself a better question. What was sadness?

You see when Maggie's mother found out that Maggie understood what happened to her father, she knew that maggie didn't feel anything for her father's death. So her mother took her to a psychiatrist. She remembered that day well.

As it turns out, Maggie Sufferers from Alexithymia.

Alexithymia is a mental disorder where she has a problem figuring out emotions, or lacking a certain few. See, the problem that people with alexithymia have isn't so much that they have no words for their emotions, but that they lack the emotions themselves. Still, Maggie was told that not everyone with the condition has the same experiences. Some have gaps and distortions in typical emotional situations. However, hers was a common case, she didn't know how to feel much but she felt some emotions sometimes. She felt actual joy when she and her friends ditched schools to go play video games. She felt actual fear when she fell off a tall platform in her old home. She felt sympathy for people many times. She felt very sympathetic for the White Haired boy in front of her. However, sadness, remorse, attraction, and love never really got to her. She understood her body and when she saw hot guys or guys that caught her eye, she knew it wasn't loving, it was just lust.

With Lincoln, however, she felt something pulling her to him, something about him just drew her to follow him.

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After a while the two finally went to get their movie tickets to watch a movie called "Little Miss Sunshine" It was a Drama/Comedy, telling a story about a family that each a have a form of depression, except for the youngest named Olive, who realizes her family sees her as a ray of sunshine and wants to bring them together.

Honestly, it was movies like that, that would make Maggie think about life in general. She doesn't know how depression feels because of her Alexithymia, but she does feel bad for others who she saw have to deal with depression. That's what she saw in Lincoln, She could tell that he never really expressed his anger or his stress to anyone before. She had heard that holding in emotions like that could be bad, feeling down and angry at yourself is just not healthy.

They had bought the tickets but the movie wouldn't start until 3:00. So she decided that it would be best for her to try and let Lincoln express her feelings. allowing him to have fun and be himself was good, but it wouldn't help in the long run.

Just because one person has one good day does not mean that the person is better. Just because they seemed happy one day, did not mean that they would be better forever.

Maggie didn't know how long Lincoln had been holding in his emotions. She knew one thing though, that for some reason she was willing to do anything to help him. She wanted to see him happy for some reason. She couldn't explain it, but that's what she wanted. 

They continued to travel around the Mall until it was 3:00, and when it was time to get to the movie, the left to watch it.

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Now there is a reason I am taking this story at such a slow pace. It's because if I just write and then write with what comes to my head at the last minute then I'd mess this story up, so some time will be needed to think about the next part, but it won't be too long. Also releasing a one-shot that will come out soon.