"Good Afternoon Miss Walsh" Kimberley smiled at sadly at the use of the title "miss".
It had only been 3 months since she and Cheryl split up and only 1 week since the divorce came through and she still wasn't ready to accept it.
"Good Afternoon" She said dropping her bag and sitting onto the sofa.
The therapist watched her closely to gage her reactions, but she couldn't find anything other than what she had been seeing in previous sessions.
She had relaxed a little bit, but only a little,she was still sitting up straight hands clasped in her knee, She was tense and She knew she had a lot of work to do if she wanted Kimberley to open up and get everything out.
In previous sessions she had barley gotten anything from her, Just when she looked like she was ready to open up she shut straight back down again.
"How have you been? Its been a while....You cancelled the last 3 appointments" She said and Kimberley looked up.
"I know, I wasn't ready, I haven't been so good, I just... I just want to speak to Cheryl, I just want to be able to help her, to do anything..." The frustration in her voice shining through.
"You do know that you need to sort yourself first"
"I know, I know that and that is why I'm here, I want to get help, I need help before I hurt myself or anyone else anymore"
"Kimberley love, Take deep breaths, Come on don't get yourself worked up, come on that's it, calm down" The woman said as she rested her hand on top of Kimberleys, as she helped to relax her.
"I am only here to help you okay, I'm not here to judge you, If you don't like a question that I ask or you aren't ready to answer just tell me and I will go back to it when I think yo are ready" She said and Kimberley nodded her head in agreement.
She still wasn't so sure about the whole thing, Therapy had never been her cup of tea, she was usually very private and only spoke to Cheryl or close friends and family.
"How have you been dealing with you're divorce?" She asked slowly, worried that she might have jumped in a little bit deep.
"I'm not" was all she said, with a slight shrug of her shoulders. "I'm not dealing and I don't think I ever will, Cheryl is the love of my life, I will love her forever and it kills me that she won't ever feel the same way about me again, She will never forigve me"
"Have you spoken with Cheryl at all?"
"No....She doesn't want to speak to me, we have only spoke through lawyers" She sighs, Holding it pretty together so far.
"What was going through you're head when you hurt Cheryl the very first time?" She hit a nerve as she asked this, Kimberley's clenched her hands into a fist, the anger burning through her face.
"I Don't know, It just happened, I Just....I"
"Had you had anything to drink?"
"Yes.."
"Both times?"
"Yes but That isn't exactly an excuse is it, I can't say I was drunk so I hit my wife, Or I was drunk so I pushed my wife down the stairs, Orr I was drunk so i slept with my ex, It doesn't matter if I was drinking or not, that problem lies beneath that" She finishes her voice raised and the therapist nods, giving her a second to calm down again.
She is glad that Kimberley isn't blaming the drink and knows that her problems lay deeper than that.
"I understand that you were in hospital a few weeks ago? The day you got your divorce through" The therapist said and it was enough to set Kimberley of as she began to cry.
