"I have so much of you in my heart"- John Keats
(OG gilbert needs more appreciation)
❦
Gilbert remained silent. Finally, he fell back onto the grass, Annabelle noticing he was closer to her this time.
"I know Annabelle," He said firmly
Her heart froze at that sentence
"What?" She asked
He sighed, a deep exhale as if it had been held in since the day they had met
"I know you are sick. You aren't leaving Avonlea. it's okay I know."
Annabelle's body became completely still. She turned to look at him, now his own eyes glued to the sky. His eyes shone under the moonlight, tears visibly welling up
"How do y-"
"I'm not- I- I know when those around me are near death. If anyone knows how to sense it, it's me. Perhaps I've just been too scared you'd say I was right. But now I know, there's no doubt about it"
"I- I'm sorry" She stuttered turning her head back to the view above them.
She heard him sigh, his fingers brushing against the white envelope between his fingers.
The breath itself feeling shuttered and spaced out as if each atom was riding on a wave of uncertainty. There wasn't really much to say and at the same time, almost too much.
"I didn't want to keep it from you. But I also didn't want you to be hurt, or think of me differently."
There was a silence once again. Anna's eyes gazing upwards, her head lying on the soft grass, whatever cold or moisture was seeping into her coat was numbing.
"So what was your plan, Anna?"
His voice was ice.
She felt her knuckles gripping the edges of her skirt as her hands lay on both sides. She knew exactly what her plan was, it wasn't thought through, or made with empathy.
It was brief and quick and something she wanted to follow without a second thought when she made it. To leave. Everyone assumed she had quietly gone back to her old life, with no grief or pain or loss. Just a slipping away and leaving behind a calm memory in the storm of the truth. She felt her breathing quickening the longer her answer hesitated between her and Gilbert.
"I wanted to just be let go, I didn't want to hurt anyone or leave behind pain. I wanted to be selfish. I wanted to feel everything I wanted to and then for it to be okay- I just I don't know I just wanted it to be okay"
Gilbert sprung up and Annabelle followed, both startled by the deep and recognisable voice of Mr Lach rang out in the open field
"He must be on field watch!" He whispered, eyes still darting around trying to locate the presently known rather angry farmer
"We can't be found like this!" She whispered in fear
He turned to look into her eyes, examining the terror that coated every part of her beautiful face
Without thinking his hand intertwined with hers,
"Run."
He pulled her up sprinting in the opposite direction of the voice into the forest
Annabelle let out a small cry as she ran harder than she ever had in the entirety of her life.
Skirt trailing dirt and hair blowing out of its neatly tucked ribbon. The feeling of freedom was coursing through each and every vein of her body, She couldn't breathe and at the same time, she was taking in entirely too much air.
Gilbert finally stopped, pulling Annabelle towards him behind a tree, eyes still darting around them to reassure them there was no one nearby. His back leaned against the trunk and him holding her close
"Are you okay?" He whispered out of breath frantically analysing their surroundings.
"I'm Fine," She said staring up into his eyes, breathing rapidly, her own starry and covered in this filter of pure bliss. "Good" He replied her own heart seeming to increase instead of slow down even though they had stopped running. Gilbert stared back into those eyes he adored. Only the drifting wind as well as the soft cooing of an owl was heard and the moonlight seemed only tonight to exist to bring light upon the two gentle faces. The silence fell so comfortably that Annabelle imagined it enveloping her.
Finally, he spoke, his voice soft and his eyes locked on her "I don't think I will ever feel this way with anybody but you Annabelle"
Her breath trembled as their hands tightened like they both knew that it was only a matter of time before they were ripped apart again. Gilbert's jaw clenched and his eyes seemed to be looking for something in hers.
"I'm scared of feeling anything for you, I am so scared that when I die...you will have to grieve over someone like me when I don't deserve your tears."
He sighed pulling her into a hug and gently resting his head on top of hers
"We are going to live every day one step at a time, and no matter how much pain I feel you have to remember you have brought more love into my life than you can ever imagine.
She shuddered underneath his words. But reality was still entirely too present, too present to sink into his lovely words.
"I-I have to go, Samuels is probably worried. Annabelle unlinked her hands and it felt as though a part of her went with him.
Gilbert watched as both parted ways in the dead of the night, fingertips gently running over the cover of the book she had given him.
❦
"HOW COULD YOU BE SO INSOLENT"
Samuel yelled, his voice raised so high even the birds had flown away from Annabelle's window
"I was not being insolent" she muttered
"when... I said to tell him...I did not mean to sneak out the window in the dead of night. What would have happened if you collapsed before you got to him and no one would find you until you were dead!"
Annabelle retreated in shame
"I am sorry Samuel, I truly am," He noticed her expression and he softened his voice, a slight smile creeping onto his lips
"Are you though?" He mocked
Annabelle couldn't help but grin in response, the memory of Gilbert's hand in hers giving her goosebumps
"No, not particularly"
❦
The next morning Annabelle woke up with a feeling of dread in her stomach, the sound of the loud noises echoing from downstairs up to her room in mumbles, She sighed trying to remember if last night had truly been real or just a dream.
"She shouldn't have to deal with that right now!"
Samuels's voice rang as her auntie replied in hushed sharp tones
"Samuel, move out of the way"
She heard the footsteps of both of them coming up towards her room and she sprang up towards the door, swinging it open. Her auntie stood huffing before sticking out her hand, letter presenting itself
"What is this?" Annabelle questioned as Her aunt and cousin glanced at each other in worry
"Its- well its a letter for you....from your Rose"
Annabelle froze, it felt as though someone had slapped her and her hands immediately began to press into the letter tightly.
"Now...darling we are here if you need us. We can stay with you while you read it or leave. But It's yours and I thought you deserved to see it"
Samuel grumbled in protest as he leaned against the bed frame.
"If it's okay...could I be alone?"
Aunt Mary smiled gently grabbing Samuels's arm
"Of course dear. we will be right in the kitchen"
Annabelle nodded before the two exited the room and she was left alone in her hands, the letter from the last part of her family she had left.
Sitting down on her soft bed she stared down at her name written in neat calligraphy, slowly she turned the letter around unfolded the top and pulled out the beautiful letter.
YOU ARE READING
Save me
Fanfiction"𝙒𝙚 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙢𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙖𝙡𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙚'𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚." ❦ Annabelle Smith is dying, she has exactly one year to live. And as her family moves her to the country in Avonlea to live her last year as normal as possible Annabelle is faced w...
