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25

Endearment

Bakas ang gulat sa mukha ko at una akong napatingin sa gawi ni Jewel. Nakikita ko ang panginginig ng kamay niya na pinipilit niyang itago sa likuran. Ang mga mata niya na nakatingin sa taas para pigilan ang mga luhang gustong makawala

"No!" Diin kong sabi

Tumingin ako kay Chase na gulat din sa sinabi ng kasama. I tried getting his attention to ask for help... to stop this game... pero nilalayo lag niya ang tingin na para bang di niya narinig ang sinabi ni Kim kanina. What the fck is happening here??

"Yeah... this is a sick dare" sambit ni Chance

Silang lahat ay pare parehas lang ang naging reaction habang si Kim ay natutuwa pa na parang di niya napapansin ang situation ng mga kaibigan

"I-I'll just choose a c-consequence!" My mind is not in its right state. Hindi ako makapag isip ng maayos. Ayoko magkamali ng sasabihin

She just smirked at me "You can't hon"

"W-why?!" Si Jas na ang napatayo sa pagkakaupo

Pinakita niya ang fish bowl

"Kase its empty?" She said in a mocking voice.

Napasabunot na lang ako saakin buhok at tumingin sa sahig

She definitely knows everything. She's torturing everyone. Why is she doing this?! Kung ako lang ang naging problema niya noon. I want to keep it the same! Hindi ko kayang makitang masaktan ang mga kaibigan ko

I lifted my head before sighing one last time for tonight

"If you have a problem with me. Let's talk. Wag kang mang damay ng iba..." madiin kong sabi while looking straightly in her eyes

She smirked once again and raised her left brow at me "I want you to know what our problem is. Till then... I'm gonna act the exact opposite as you guys want..."

I seldom curse and I made a reminder to myself not to curse my friends but this is way under the line
"You're so fcking immature..."

Agad akong tumayo at hinili ang dalawa kong babae na kaibigan palabas. Dumiretso kami sa study room ng bahay nila Jewel at agad nilock ang pinto. Sinadya kong lutungan ang mura kanina para maintindihan ng gagang babae na yon na may nasasaktan... hindi lang isa...

The two started crying but Jewel's cry was the loudest habang si Jas ay pinipigilan ang mga luha at tahimik na humihikbi. Agad ko silang nilapitan at niyakap ng mahigpit. Buti na lang ay nakabukas ang aircon nila at wala ang mga katulong nila.

I closed my eyes habang tinatahan ang dalawa. They both have handkerchiefs at yon ang ginagamit nila pampunas sa mata habang nakasubsob sila saakin. Their warmth is not from the happiness, love, contentment... this warmth makes me feel the sadness

I want to cry too... the pain of seeing my friends tore apart because of our emotions. We act before thinking. We started to do things that are way too hurtful na umaabot sa puntong ganto.

My mom told me that whenever I'm mad I need to close my eyes and relax myself for 10 seconds. After 10 seconds, the first thing that comes to our mind should give us doubts wether to say it out loud or not. After deciding, remain your calmness and speak. Walk away if you know you're right. Stay if you need more explanation

I want to cry on someone's shoulder pero mas kailangan ako ng mga kaibigan ko. I decided along time ago na ipagpapaliban ko muna ang sariling kasiyahan para sa iba and right now, alam kong tama ang desisyon ko. My friends happiness is mine. Their sadness are mine too. Through thick and thin, I'll stay. I will be the balance in our bond.