the child that was blessed by the stars (hht x ysg)

light

shi gu felt like he sobered up immediately. panic struck him like a bucket of ice cubes. he frantically searched his mind for an answer that made hao ting clear that he could never be afraid, that it was just his anxious brain acting for him. he wanted to be close to him, more than anything. he just didn't know how. instead of telling him, he just murmured: "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to push you." it was the first time he saw the other drained from all color. usually the taller always had a healthy flush on his cheeks, so seeing him this pale frightened shi gu.

 only after hao ting left without another word, did he fully register how wrong his reply was. hao ting had thought he apologized because he was, indeed, scared of him, when it was the exact opposite. he felt bad for even letting the taller think, he wouldn't trust him. 

if someone asked him, yu shi gu would say he trusted hsiang hao ting with his life, without thinking twice. he let his body drag him to the ground, suddenly heavy with fear and frustration. shi gu hugged his body to his chest, falling asleep on the floor.  two days later, bo xiang and chi gang had invited themselves to join the two on their short vacation and they arrived at the hostel. hao ting has spoken the bare minimum with him, but he was staring at him with those devastated puppy eyes at any chance he got. shi gu almost couldn't take it. it was his set goal to talk to his boyfriend as soon as possible, but then he heard the taller ask for two single beds at the reception. his heart felt heavy, because hao ting probably did it so that he would feel more comfortable staying in a room together. it also pained him, a tiny voice in the back of his head telling him, it was because the other didn't want to be with him anymore. shi gu swallowed the thought down and closed his eyes in frustration. he had to try harder to get the taller to talk to him.

they ended up with a double bed anyways, just as they had booked in the first place. still not looking him in the eyes, hao ting offered to sleep on the couch and before shi gu could ask him for a conversation, he escaped the stuffy awkwardness to buy some new swimming trunks.

shi gu met chi gang coincidentally in the resort's garden, the older playing with a small kitten next to a pond. being the good brotherly figure he was, chi gang immediately picked up on his moodiness. to relieve his burdened heart a little he shared his troubles with his friend, telling him about their small fight and how hao ting had misunderstood him. if he was being honest, he feared for the other to slip away slowly, talking to him less and less. it was as if his colors had faded first and now even his contours were harder to grasp. chi gang told him that it was a normal consequence of being in love to want to hide away sometimes, but that he had the same responsibility as hao ting to secure their relationship. he wasn't the only one feeling insecure, but even chi gang could tell how smitten he was for the tall boy. 

if he had a problem, he had to tell hao ting directly, the boy wasn't a mind reader. shi gu had found exactly the motivation he needed in their conversation and went back to the room, full of determination. hao ting sat on the bed, turning off the tv as the smaller entered. "just in time. we can go and eat." he stated, ready to leave. shi gu looked at him and suddenly he saw the small, insecure boy, that chi gang ge had talked about, hidden inside the loud, confident teenager. he saw how new this was for both of them and how the taller had done nothing but try to make him feel safe and happy. shi gu's heart swelled in affection. before the other could get up he seated himself on his lap, taking his face in both his hands and placed his lips firmly on hao ting's. "i really, really like you." the confession easily slipped past his lips. hao ting looked baffled, not believing his ears. "every day with you makes me so happy. it's so perfect, that it seems like i can have it all." he continues. 

hao ting cut him off by kissing the insecurity away, before it could even unfold properly. the taller's hands rested on his shoulder blades, a gentle reassurance that he could truly take all he wants from him, hao ting would never deny him anything. shi gu quickly proceeded, before he'd start crying. "i'm sorry i pushed you away. i never liked anyone before, that's why i'm afraid. i just don't know what anyone could like about me." he spotted the shock on his lover's features, who seemed to have grasped the severity of their misunderstanding. hao ting apologized for not having known and promised he'd never have to be afraid anymore, being the one that was in his heart. with the other's final words, shi gu found himself kissing him senseless again. 'you complete me', was all the reassurance he needed in one phrase. as they moved more onto the bed, shi gu couldn't get hao ting's top off quick enough. he finally felt one hundred percent safe and couldn't wait to fully see the gorgeous man that was ready to give him his all.

"i love you." shi gu breathed in between two kisses, unable to comprehend how much he meant to say these words before. he saw the light in hao ting's eyes grow, taking over his expression and ending up in the softest smile ever dedicated to him."i love you, too." the taller simply answered, before they kissed again, more passionate than ever. the next moment, shi gu was flipped on his back, warm arms catching him before he could crash into the mattress. hao ting savored every moment, every kiss and touch and the smaller could see it whenever he opened his eyes to take in a snippet of the other's otherworldly appearance. the light was bringing out every soft shadow in his features, his skin almost glowing. hao ting kissed his way down shi gu's torso, drinking in every detail of him, while shi gu struggled to keep up, still feeling the same amount of heat and adoration. he was kissed breathless, just as he had wished for, a stuttering mess under the taller man's trembling touches. they were soft and incredibly hot at the same time, leaving marks where hao ting's mouth couldn't reach.

the smaller took notice of all the small sounds of pleasure the other made. he might've been the more vocal one, but his lover's low groans and soothing pants were a million times prettier in his ears. he breathed in hao ting's scent of cinnamon and sweat and cologne and tasted the strawberries the other had eaten earlier in the car. he could feel the feverish skin underneath his fingertips and finally, he was able to see the true beauty, he had the honor to call his. 

shi gu had never felt more happy waking up next to his boyfriend after their passionate night. the other was vibrant, happiness practically radiating from his skin and shi gu wondered what he had done to deserve him. he decided to stop questioning and instead thank the stars every night, for having blessed him with such luck.

they celebrated the housewarming of their new home one and a half months later. shi gu's heart stung a little whenever he thought about the turn his life took, but it was the good kind. the one that pinched him a bit to confirm that he was living reality and not just some massive, beautiful dream. he went up the rooftop to talk to his parents for a while, knowing that if he'd look to his side, hsiang hao ting would probably be there, placing a comforting hand on his lower back. after a few minutes he heard the familiar voice: "hey handsome, are you alone here?". smiling to himself, he couldn't stop the happiness that was bubbling up in his chest from showing. 

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thank you so much for reading.