Darkness Reigns 《an Anidala fanfic》

《 Chapter Seven 》

     Complications, they said. She was dying from complications from the birth. They said there was nothing they could do. They said that we had been lucky that the children had survived, but that there was no way she was going to make it. The Emperor had left her more than half dead, and though the droids had done all they could, she would most likely not survive the night.

     This was the most planet shattering news that I had ever had to hear. She was dieing and there was nothing I could do to save her. I could feel the life slowly draining from her, as she got weaker by the minute. And all I could do was watch her, lying uncouncious on the delivery table, as her spirit slowly melted away.

     I should have brought her with me. I shouldnt have left her alone. It was my fault, I had given Palpatine the opportunity to harm her, by keeping her here when I was not there to protect her. The babies had survived and where in good health. But they were little pieces of her, and I couldn't stand to even look at them, while she was dieing.

     I wasn't powerful enough to save her now. And I had killed the only person who was. She would die, because of me. And I would be left with two living breathing reminders of my failure, along with the memories, to haunt me for the rest of my life.

     I didn't know what to do. There was nothing I would do. I had an army at my command, a galaxy that trembled before me, but in this situation I was utterly powerless. I hated feeling powerless, it make me feel weak, it made me feel small.

     I hated not being in control.

     The next few days where torture. Padme continued to slip in and out of consciousness. And came near death to many times. However, what was even more torture than that, was that during these days my every weakness was on display. I should have been ruling my Empire, but I was in a medical bay, watching over a nearly dead woman. I should have been watching rulers cower at my feet, but instead I was yelling at droids to save my wife. She was my biggest weakness, and now I saw how. The Emperor was right. Darth Vader, a fearsome Sith Lord, wouldnt spend day and night in a medical room, begging someone to cling to life. It wasn't Darth Vader, it was Anakin Skywalker. I hadn't destoryed him, he was still there. And as long as she was there, bring out that side of me. I would never be as powerful as I could have been. 

     After this realization, I began to spend less and less time at her bedside. I never asked for reports on her health, but I still listen to them when I was given them. I still loved her, and could not stop wishing to be with her. But I had an Empire to rule, and a reputation to uphold. And she was the only thing holding me back from it.

However, as the weeks drew on, she did get better. And soon every report showed better than the last. She had started to speak when she was consious. She stopped slipping in and out of consciousness. She had held the babies. Still I didn't go and see her. Not yet. I would, soon, but only when the time was right.

     I hadn't seen Vader since I had begun to get better. The droid had informed me that at first, he had not left my side, but gradually, he had started to leave more and more, and now, he never came at all. I wondered if he had lost hope that I would survive. Or if he had lost any feeling for me that would warent a visit to see how I was.

I was still too week to get out of bed. But I assumed that as soon as I was, I would be moved back into the dark and dreary room I had been locked up in before. I wondered if Luke and Leia, the names I had decided on for the babies, would be locked up in their with me, or not.

I didn't want to take the chance. So, again, I planned my escape, for as soon as I was strong enough.

However, two weeks later, before I was able to inact my plan, I received an unwanted visitor. 

     "Vader, I see that you have finally remembered my existence." 

     "I have an Empire to run, if you have forgotten."

     "How could I have, you have imprisoned me in it." 

     "Padme, you know why I did it, I did what I had to do, I did it for you."

     "To save me from death, yes, then why did none of your dark side powers help me get better? You left and didn't even care to visit, while I was dying, was that "for me" as well? And let's not forget the reason I am still too weak to leave my bed, was it not your new master that tried to kill me, was that also "for me"?" 

     "Your vision is clouded, everything I did was for your own good! And for the good of the galaxy!"

     "Yes, the galaxy thanks you for imprisoning it, and taking away it's freedom. And I thank you for doing the same to me, you're wife. And I'm sure the Jedi would thank you too, if they were alive, but you killed them."

     "You will regret what you just said." He replied bitterly, I would have, I would have regretted saying anything that harsh to Anakin, but not to this shell of a man with my husband's face. Because I meant every word. And I never would have if that man actually had been Anakin, which is how I knew he was not. Vader didn't visit my medical room again, which left me as much time as I needed to plan and execute my escape from hell.