A reason to doubt me

I'm here to stay

Lindsey and I step out of the plane and we're being taken to a hotel. No chance in hell would I stay in the house that I've raised a family in with a man I once thought loved, right now. I have a death grip on Lindsey's hand, I don't have to say it out loud that I'm nervous. I can't even imagine how this will go. I would be more than happy to have Lindsey with me in the room, but I can't, it has to be me and Jeff, but once we're done I'm sure I'll need him more than ever before.

We walk up to our rooms, Lindsey's staying in the next one to mine. I give him a hug and I'm not willing to let go. "It's going to be alright." He assures, squeezing my shoulders. 

"I can't be so sure."

"I am. This might suck, but once you're done, just think, you and I will be together. Now... Doesn't that sound wonderful?"

"God..." I draw him closer again. "I can't wait for that to happen, but this is torture. I wish it weren't so complicated."

"Things have alway been complicated with us, baby." He presses a kiss to my hair and pulls away. "Can I let you go?"

"I think I'll manage. He should be here in about an hour."

"Ok, but if you need anything, I'm right next door."

"Yes, I know. Thank you." I give him a brief kiss. "Love you."

"I love you, too."

~

I've been trying not to think too much, not that I succeeded. I keep going over the things I plan on telling him and I'm starting to get a headache, my heart is beating out of my chest, my palms are getting sweaty. I'm one big nervous mess. I'm not sure how to approach the matter. God, he's so clueless... I'm startled by the knock on the door, I don't rush to open it, instead I take my time, taking deep breaths and telling myself everything is fine.

"Hey!" Jeff grins at me as I take a step back to let him in, I don't lock the door... "I've missed you so much, baby." He tries to kiss me, but I stop him. I don't want his disgusting mouth anywhere near me.

"No. And don't you 'baby' me."

"Someone's in a foul mood." His arms go around my waist and I unclasp them from behind my back and let them fall back to his sides. "Stephanie, what is up with you? I understand you're angry with me that I didn't turn up that night, but let me explain, sweetheart."

I cross my arms over my chest, keeping safe distance between us. "Alright, I'm all ears."

"I have a lot of work right now and I wasn't able to get the plane ticket myself, so I asked Olivia to do it for me and she got the dates mixed up, she booked me a ticket for the next Friday, after the one I was supposed to come see you. It's not a big deal. Now you're here and we can make up for lost time." Again, he reaches out to touch me, but I step back. "I don't like your attitude. I don't get what's wrong with you? Why did you ask to meet me if you're being such a bitch?"

"Did you come up with that little story of yours on the way here?" I let the insult slide, he's called me worse.

"What do you mean? It's what happened." I see him getting agitated. I wouldn't be as confident in myself right now if Lindsey wasn't in the other room.

"You know, I almost believed you."

"Stephanie..." I don't miss the warning in his voice. "Why are you being like this, mm? We could spend this time to enjoy each other."

"Oh you've been enjoying yourself alright." 

"What are you trying to tell me?"

"I'm telling you that you're a liar, Jeff. I know what happened, I know why you didn't show up, I know everything, so you can drop the act."