ONE-SHOTS [Ejen Ali]

6 | Afraid to Be Alone

"This was the day you died."

"Why do you remember this?" Ali asked, scratching his collarbone in irritation. "Even I stopped keeping track of dates. And I still missed five releases of Detective Hero."

He was wearing his mother's hoodie, and his hair was loose and free. He looked exactly like how he died, his clothes singed and riddled with burnt marks.

Alicia sighed, putting her hands into his pockets as she turned her back from his tombstone. "Why won't you move on?" she rasped, feeling a chilly presence behind her. "Of all the spirits I saw, you're the most persistent one I've met."

"Hm," Ali drawls. He leaned on his tombstone, crossing his arms as he thought about the same question she did. "Because I don't want to? Is that an answer you accept?"

"No."

"Then sucks for you."

Alicia tried not to turn and glare at him. Looking at him would only remind her how he failed to believe his reasons, indirectly being the cause of his death. His personality changed drastically, too; like it was death that gave him no reason to fear for anyone's opinions, feelings, or lives.

He was a complete stranger after his transition from the land of the living. It was like when he died, his heart to care died too.

"Hey," Ali continues, looking away from her. His eyes were on his grave, staring at the marks on the stone. Ali bin Ghazali, the name he owned before he died. Now he was only Ali. "Is Bobby still alive?"

Alicia kept her eyes forward. As far as her vision was stretched out, she could only see a sea of graves, tombstones littering the hills. Yet Ali's was shaded under a tree, a spot reserved for children who died before their time.

Children, huh? Ali was only 12 when he was killed.

"Why?" Alicia tried not to think about it. "He did kill you; and you don't seem like the type of ghost to be bothering with the living."

Ali lowered himself down, hugging his knees. He was facing away from Alicia's silhouette. "I don't know," he admits, turning to her. "The angels tell me to look for revenge, but I don't know why."

Angels.

Ali is dead, and it was no surprise that angels would exist. Alicia didn't believe in superior beings, and Ali's words seemed like a child playing make-believe, but she did have expectations that a world beyond death would be real.

"Revenge on Bobby?"

Ali didn't answer right away. Instead, he tilted his head backwards on the stone. Sun shone down on his face, shattered as they were blocked by the leaves.

"Not just Bobby," he said, voice growing softer. "On Agent Ganz, Agent Rizwan, Agent Dayang... a lot of people. Even my dad and the General." He curled into a tighter ball. "I don't know why."

Alicia turned to him, expressionless, but her tone took on a hint of surprise.

"What about me?" she asks, rather rattled by his sentences. "Did they ask you to take revenge on me too?"

To her shock, Ali nodded. His eyes were sad but hollow.

"Basically everyone I met," he says sadly. "You and Uncle Bakar included."

"But why?"

"I don't know."

Alicia tried to understand why Ali was told to take revenge on most of the people in his life. Some were understandable, like Rizwan and Ganz; but others were troubling. His own father? Agent Bakar? It made no sense.

It wasn't just anybody that told him, either. They were angels. If they were truly as holy as Ali said they were, it was no doubt that they would allow him to obtain a piece of mind upon haunting the people that wronged him.

Agent Bobby and Fit? They were the ones that killed him. That chase in the mall after the talk with Alicia, led to a series of bombing events set off by Bobby by accident. Ali was ultimately killed in those explosions, his body barely salvaged.

Perhaps, Ali never made peace with his own death.

"But I know where they are," Ali says abruptly, looking to her. "Everyone on the list. It's like I can see through their eyes... including yours." He smiled, pained. "Do I really look that messy?"

Oh.

Alicia hangs her head low. "Yeah." She raised her wrist, checking the time. "I have to go. It's my shift in MATA."

She begins to leave, but a voice stops her. She turned to Ali, who was now standing in front of his tomb, arms crossed.

"Stop coming, Alicia," he demands, his glare chilly and silent. "Stop trying to get me to pass on."

Alicia grins faintly. "I thought you said you didn't know why you can't leave."

"I don't," Ali agrees, his tone cold. "You have a life, and I don't." He turns on his heels, putting a hand on the carved slab. His name was starting to fade from time, and weeds were overtaking the tree's roots. "I don't want to remember the past. That's over now."

Does he not want to remember?

Or is he trying to forget about the awful things he'd seen?

Alicia sighs. "I'll be back next year," she promises. "Hopefully, you've found your peace by then."

He didn't turn. "Hopefully," he resonates. "But I'm starting to think about this revenge. I'm warning you now. You being here is already pushing my boundaries."

Alicia doesn't answer. Instead, she starts to walk, away from tree that overshadowed his grave. But as she continues to walk, reaching the gates of the cemetery, it was then she saw not just one tree, but dozens, each on their individual hill, all of them looking over a grave each.

Most were wilted, and the remainder was close to withering. Only Ali's remained emerald green, blooming with its full glory. A sign that its spirit had yet to pass on, refusing to leave the mortal realm.

Alicia heaves a heavy breath.

If it were her underground, she'd never make peace with her tormentors either.