The Styles Paradox and Other Alternate Universe Conundrums (HS AU)

The Toast Is Ready

It's started off a day as unremarkable as any.
"Herman darling, stop trying to electrocute that spider, or take it off of the table at least. Lester how's breakfast coming along?"
A very loud buzzing noise erupted from the kitchen, followed by very bright flashes of light.
"THE TOOOAST.......IS READYYYY!" father bellowed.
I sat at the kitchen table watching in abject horror as my brother tortured the arachnid. A wildness in his eyes that everyone knew in no way could be tamed. As long as my cat kept it's head I tried not to pay too much attention. My father hobbled to the table carrying several large plates piled with food. Herman shoved his persecution project off of the table and began to savagely stab the pancake that was placed on his plate. "Good morning Tiffany darling, did you sleep well?" My father queried as he plopped himself down in the wooden chair.
"It was fine.....except for the screaming in the basement." My mother nodded understandingly, her ponytail containing her springy dark hair bobbing wildly. "Space rats are awful creatures." Herman lifted his head ever so slightly, "Did you stab it?" Father's big brown eyes looked over the top of his round black framed glasses, something he tended to do when dispirited. "No son we didn't stab it....."
Herman shook his head in disappointment.
Kudos my siamese jumped into my lap and helped himself to some of my scrambled eggs. I let him, seeing as how my appetite was quelled from Herman's earlier activities. When we had finished eating, Father stood to his full, lanky six foot four and cleared his throat. "Now that we have finished consuming our breakfast, your mother and I have an announcement to make." Herman and I looked at each other with matching concerned expressions. Mother smiled as she looked up at father, giving a small nod to encourage him to continue.
"As you all know Mother and I have been working tirelessly on a new project that we have had to keep under tight secrecy. Now dear children I am happy to announce that Melancholster Labs has successfully opened a functioning, stable wormhole." Mother excitedly rose out of her chair, "We will be unveiling our findings to the world in one month. Isn't it wonderful! " They both smiled widely. Almost creepily. It's almost comically cliche that this was announced to us at breakfast. Either my parents are stereotypically mad or my whole life is fiction and some bizarre girl is simply creating it as she goes...........impossible.
"What would happen is someone went through it?" Herman inquired, his curly mop of brightly dyed red hair almost entirely covering his face. "Well my dear son, it's very likely that although it is stable, if someone were to be sucked into it they'd be torn limb from limb before they could even say 'ouch'." Herman endeavored not to smile. He did not succeed.
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*still editing*
Not gonna lie this is the best thing I've accomplished in life. Which says a lot since it's so shitty I could cry. 😭
But anyways.
Comment and like and all that good stuff, though I don't blame you if you choose not to 😂.
❤️✌️