Clovers, Sunsets & Hazel

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To taste heaven and hell is ecstatic and yet we rarely do because consequence is scary and vengeful. So why taste the forbidden fruits.
- M
Matthew

His eyes pierced me like his knife through that pancake with too much sugar. He said that he could eyeball it, he said it'd be fine. Why did I trust him each time he lied that same smile of ease even though we both knew he was wrong.

A tongue upon a roof, a lip drowning in maple and blueberries. We ate in silence though our eyes said a thousand words, he asked why I couldn't look at him the same I did last night.

He asked why I lost the passion to paint his canvas, rather wanting pen on paper. He told me to look at him with the burning eyes of Sodom, he told me to look at him. He screamed at me to look at him.

The crash of a knife onto an empty plate encompassed the empty atmosphere, making me flinch. A tsk and an eye roll coming from a boy of burning cities, a boy whose hair echoed the sun scorching my skin.

His turn swift and yet the wind wasn't tough enough to wipe away his flames nor my tears.

The water pressure enough for the fire brigade and yet flames lay at the tips of crimson, my eyes didn't meet his because he would burn me.

Torches annihilated my skin, my cells becoming crisp like his father's bacon. I dared a lookup, just to learn it only added fuel. Just to learn that I burnt down my house and his temple.

"What's wrong with you?"

Tears of fury brimmed his lids, he looked confused and wondered if he was just momentary for me. I knew that with the way his head tilted just slightly.

I shrugged.

"Matthew you know that's not fair, you can't act like I mean the world to you and then the next second you can't even look at me."

Tears brimmed my eyes, my lower lips quivered with maple slowly dripping down its side.

"Look at me."

My plate didn't leave my vision, no matter how many time I felt his lips quiver as he said my name. No matter how his voice held my name before pushing of a cliff for its love letters to slip into a forest.

He pulled my head up, force full and yet his fingers left a welcoming burn just under my chin. His eyes twinkled, was it the beauty that he bore or the tears he dare not share?

Was it love or need for momentary satisfaction? To feel love for a moment in the arms of the other, as our breaths were in sync.

"Matthew, what do you want from me,"

I shook my head, tears of crystal dispersed down my cheek.

What did I want from him?

What did I want from myself?

"Matthew, please tell me something. I don't know what to feel."

I grabbed his cheek, wiping away tears as more fell. His fire being smothered, and olive returned to his skin. Cherry gleaming every shade of kiss me softly.  Hazel daring me to grab my paint and make his canvas beautiful, daring me to feel free in hazel.

I kissed him.

If felt like the last time, tears running down both our cheeks. I savoured every taste of cherry on my tongue as though it were the last on earth, crimson tears leaving me and colliding with him.

His arm drifted to my neck, his sniffles became louder.

He pulled my head ever closer into his, as we rose to our feet. Unable to move like leeches stuck to the other's skin; we melted into the other, losing where I began and he ended. And yet it felt so right.

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