I think about it all the time.
It would be so easy to just end all of the pain, suffering, and self-hatred that I feel on a daily basis.
No more depression, no more cutting, just ignorant bliss.
I don’t know what will happen, but what I do know is that it will be better than the way I am living right now.
I can’t live with who I am.
I am living in constant hell, and it’s killing me; it’s actually slowly driving me insane.
So the real question is: How will I do it?
There are so many options:
Hanging
Suffocation
Drowning
Slitting my wrist
Overdose
Jumping
Electrocution
And so many more....
I’ve written so many suicide notes in the past years, and I’ve never actually gone through with it. Suicide is NOT the cowards way out!! A person has to be going through the worst physical and emotional pain imaginable to even think about ending his or her own life.
And.....I’ve finally gotten to that point.....
No, I’m not brave enough to end my life right now. At the moment I’m hanging on to a small strand of hope that maybe my life will get better.
Dear depression,
...........welcome back......
