Alpha Benji

♕Chapter Twenty-One♕

An unusual feeling sat in my chest all night. It was a peculiar combination of pent up anxiety and excitement for my day. I had trouble sleeping, mulling over all the possible scenarios in my head on what could occur at the daycare. 

I was nervous about the potential rejection. So much of my personal identity revolved around caring for children. When I lost my parents, working at the daycare gave me a purpose and a newly-formed family. If I couldn't find that type of relationship here, I fear I wouldn't be able to find it anywhere else in this pack. 

It took me hours to finally convince my brain to fall into a soft lull of silence, welcoming sleep with open arms.  

♕♕♕

"Are you nervous?" 

I thought the answer to his question was clearly obvious, considering my restless movements since I entered the kitchen. The unsettling feeling I felt last night still sat in my stomach, making it hard for me to simple sit down with him and relax. 

The harsh words from his father still rung in my ears. I hate to admit it, but I am desperate to prove him wrong. To prove them all wrong. 

"Yes," I admit, not bothering to lie when it is so blatantly obvious. "I want to make a good impression on them. When is Jeremiah coming?" 

Benji's eyes go blank for a fleeting moment as he searches his mind for Jeremiah's mindlink, before refocusing on my presence. "He's on his way now. He should be here soon."

I'm glad he's almost here, considering how keen I am to start my day. But, I still wish I had someone else accompanying me. Someone more familiar like Belinda, or friendlier like Dotty or Alaric. Benji must have been able to sense my feelings towards my new caretaker. 

His large body arose from his seat, moving his way through the small kitchen to discard his coffee cup in the sink. "Do you not like Jeremiah?" He asked, letting the water from the faucet run to fill the silence that followed his question.

There is nothing hostile in his question, but maybe that's what makes me so anxious. I have gotten so used to his words being laced with irritation over the past few weeks. This new attitude he's been exhibiting, while welcoming, is unfamiliar territory. 

"That's not it." I insist, shifting my weight between my feet. I opted to stand by the doorframe instead of sit, too antsy to remain still. "I just don't know him like I know Dotty or Belinda." 

"He can keep you much safer than Dotty or Belinda. He's a trusted warrior." 

I arch an eyebrow out of mild-curiosity. His back is still turned towards me, his focus remaining on the dishes in the sink. "You're nervous I'll get hurt at a daycare?"

The muscles in his back flex as he lets silence fill the room. I watch as he shakes his head, his sandy hair moving slightly at the action. Benji turns to face me, letting his body lean against the sink he was previously busying himself over. "No, our daycare is very secure. I'm just taking precautions. Not many people know who you are, but if the wrong people find out...I just want to make sure someone is with you to make sure you are protected." 

My heart skips a beat at his confession. It feels unnatural to be worried about an outside source threatening my wellbeing. At my old pack, the only people we feared were the Imperious pack. I am already in the home of our former tormentors. 

"You think your pack members will hurt me?" I ask. There is no one else I can think of that would have a problem with my presence at the pack. I have remained a shadow the past few weeks, never leaving a trail where I went. I can't imagine many people even know I am here, let alone who I am to Benji.