Alpha Benji

♕Chapter Twenty-Eight♕

The unsettling weight in my chest wouldn't go away. My mind was foggy with all the information spewed at me over the weekend. Benji wanted the ceremony to commence this week, but I can't see how any of that could be possible.

There is no way I could both mentally and physically prepare in time.

I had hoped that maybe preparing for the ceremony would give us more quality time together to bond, but in fact, it was the opposite. Benji was constantly busy either meeting with his advisors or tending to normal pack business. I was left alone for most of the weekend, only having small bits of insight and advice from June and Dotty.

"He is such an impatient ass. Who in their right mind decides to have a Luna ceremony with a weeks' notice?" Dotty huffed, whispering her critique under her breath to not catch her mother's attention. "I like this fabric. What do you think?"

It took an immense amount of mental effort to tear myself away from my self-detrimental thoughts to gaze at the piece of fabric in Dotty's hands. It was an ornate piece of fabric, stained gold and embossed with details.

"It's pretty," I commented softly, acknowledging the beauty of the fabric with less enthusiasm then Dotty. I wasn't lying – it was a great selection for the dress, but it just wasn't a priority to me. What I wore for the ceremony didn't matter to me. I was more concerned with what I was expected to do.

Dotty's eyes narrowed slightly at my comment, letting a sigh escape her lips. "What's bothering you? You seem so off." She commented.

My eyes darted across the room to check on June who was too consumed in venue planning to pay attention to our conversation. I caught the bottom of my lip between my teeth, nibbling with a sense of urgency before responding. "It's all so fast. I don't feel ready." I admit, casting my gaze downward to stare at my lap. "But I don't want to upset him. He's happy."

"Screw him, who cares?" Dotty snorted, leaning closer to rest a comforting hand on my lap. "This an important ceremony – for both you and this pack. You'll be forever tied to us, and forever tied to my brother." She hesitates for a moment, before continuing. "Aria, you know I adore you. I have absolutely no idea why the Moon Goddess blessed Benji with someone as selfless and kind as you, but he's lucky. We're all lucky. Our pack..." she lowers her voice, "...needs help. I think you know, firsthand, that we have issues that need to be fixed. And, I think that's why the Goddess gave you to us."

My confusion must have been obvious to Dotty. She continued to talk.

"Benji is an amazing Alpha. He's strong, resilient, and will do anything to protect his pack. But, somewhere along the lines, he's gotten lost. It happened to my father, too. Power makes you do crazy things." She offers me a soft smile as she pauses to catch her breath. "But, as our Luna, you could change it all. You can make our pack better. I know you can. I know you say you don't feel ready, but I think you are. The Goddess wouldn't put you in this position if you weren't." 

I blinked away the memory of Dotty's words from earlier. It's been difficult to forget our conversation. 

I never thought the Goddess had a plan for me. I always assumed I was meant to live a simple life as an Omega, helping my pack and staying in the shadows. When both my parents passed away, I thought that was my big, life challenge. The thing that would test me and shape my life.

But maybe I was wrong. 

Maybe this is my test. 

♕♕♕

"I need to talk to you." 

I spent hours mulling over my words in my room, debating if I should even go through with the conversation. But it had to be done. Dotty's words have been weighing heavy in my head. She thinks that I can make a difference in this pack - and I'm going to try.