Scars

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TW: HEAVY CHAPTER CHILD ABUSE AND SEXUAL ASSAULT MENTIONS! This chapter is a little more graphic than usual, I am not planning to make another chapter this heavy but this one is going to be heavy. I will add a marker where the topic is brought up so if you would like to read until that point and message me for a trigger free summary of the rest please do!

The rest of the day at the mall passed too quickly, by the time the best friend squad left the sun was starting to set. Catra sleepily was laying across the backseat, head in Adora's lap, as Adora absently ran her hand through Catra's wild brunette hair. Bow and Glimmer smiled as they glanced back, keeping their music lower than earlier so Catra wouldn't stir from her spot. As they arrived at Bow's home they all said their goodbyes as he leapt out of the car.
"Behave you three, I'll see you guys Monday!" Bow grinned waving at his friends, Glimmer waved back while Adora smiled and Catra grunted acknowledgement.
"Bye Bow!" Glimmer exclaimed, Catra chuckled as she stretched her arms over Adora's lap.
"What? Not gonna kiss your boyfriend goodbye?" Catra teased, half opening her blue eye to grin crookedly at the pink haired girl.
Glimmer's cheeks puffed up blushing as she pulled away from Bow's driveway. "I will make you walk home." Glimmer threatened.
Catra chuckled a little more before shutting her eye again, Adora rolled her eyes and flicked the girl's ear earning a whine. "Be nice." Adora warned Catra, who simply huffed and clutched onto the blonde's legs.
"I'm always nice." Catra grumbled, this time Glimmer was the one to roll her eyes and Adora had to cover her mouth to stop laughter from escaping. 'I love that purr.' Adora thought to herself as she watched Catra with soft eyes.
"Sometimes." Adora corrected, hand returning to the girl's hair to absently play with it. Catra slowly began to purr so only Adora could hear, making her smile softly. As they arrived at Catra's home the tired girl grumbled, curling herself tighter against Adora's legs. "Come on, you can go sleep in your bed." Adora prodded her side making her friend whine again but she slowly rose, stretching herself out one last time.
She opened the door and swung her legs out but soon froze, turning back to Adora she looked like she wanted to say something. Her mismatched eyes went wide as she remembered Glimmer was there, staring at her, and she seemed to think better of whatever it is she wanted to say. Turning back around she stepped out of the car and Adora felt her heart instantly ache, missing the warmth of Catra on her lap.
"See you later, Sparkles." She grinned toothily at the pink haired girl who huffed, turning around in her seat to cross her arms, ignoring Catra. The wild haired girl laughed, turning back to Adora who had the look of a lost puppy dog, Catra softened and smiled as gently as she could. "Bye Adora." She murmured, closing the car door with a snap before heading up to her front door.
Adora's ice blue eyes stayed on Catra until she disappeared into the house, a bit of tension returning to her now relaxed form. Glimmer waited a moment longer before driving away, looking back at Adora with worry in her. 'I need her with me.' Adora thought to herself, oblivious to Glimmer's staring as she stared out the car door. 'I don't want to be away from her.' Adora shook the thought away, finally pulling her eyes away from the window and to her feet as they drove home.
Her heart ached in ways she didn't know it could, leaving Catra was so hard every time they were separated she feared someone would take her away. The thought of losing her friend again felt like her heart was being ripped from her chest. 'I can't lose her again, not now not ever, I love her.' Adora's face went red at the thought as if she said it aloud, her heart feeling as if it was just thrown off a cliff. 'Why does it feel like this? She's my best friend, of course I love her.' Adora rationalized to herself, desperately trying to get her racing heart to stay still.
XxX
Catra stretched out onto her bed with a small grunt, Fang seeming to appear out of nowhere jumped up onto her back and began to purr happily. Catra chuckled, turning to pick up the bundle of fur and cradle him in her arms, giving his feet small kisses. "Did you miss me buddy?" Fang mewled an answer and Catra chuckled again, scratching behind her ears with clawed hands he instantly melted into the feeling.
Her phone buzzed and as she checked it her heart skipped a beat, it was from Adora.
"We just got home I had so much fun today, this Friday Bow has a robotics competition and a sleepover to celebrate when he wins wanna come?" Catra smiled to herself, already knowing she would never pass up a chance to sleep in Adora's bed.
"What happens if he loses?" Catra teased, Adora instantly typing back.
"It'll be a consoling sleepover then." Catra laughed.
"Then I'll be there." Catra responded, clicking the screen off she pushed herself off the bed to stand in front of her mirror, much to Fang's dismay.
The wild haired brunette grinned to herself as she looked over the shredded crop top, it had been Adora's but she had made some 'modifications' to it this morning and the girl said she could keep it. Catra had started to really enjoy wearing clothes that were Adora's, they always smelt like that mix of vanilla and ocean she adored so much. Catra blushed and pinched her eyes shut as she realized what she was allowing herself to do. 'I can't keep doing this, we're friends. Nothing more.' Catra reluctantly slipped off the crop top, changing into a large t-shirt and shorts to climb back into bed with Fang. Adora continued to cloud her mind and Catra growled to herself, annoyed with the way her heart felt everytime she thought about the muscular girl.
Catra flipped on her x-box looking through her games for something to distract her from her thoughts. She settled on a first person shooter, so she could mindlessly kill, she grabbed her controller as she scrambled into bed and she saw her phone was lit up with another message. Picking up the device hoping it was Adora she was let down as she read the message.
"Is your mom home tonight?" Catra rolled her eyes, instantly knowing what the message was about. She bit her lip in thought, her eyes drifted to the small pile of Adora's clothes on the floor and felt a bang of need go through her chest. 'I could use a distraction..' She thought to herself, tearing her eyes away from the clothes to type back a message.
"Nope, mom went to visit dad since he's only an hour away this week." Catra started to play her game as she waited for the predictable response from the girl on the other end. Fang seemed to almost sense what was going on, he was sitting on the edge of the bed staring at Catra, ears lowered.
Catra rolled her eyes, trying her best to ignore the stare from the judging feline. "Look, you don't get it." She mumbled to the cat, she tried to rationalize it by talking to Fang but she was really trying to reason with her own heart. "Adora doesn't want me like I want her, we're just friends and that's ok." Catra saw Fang flick his tail out of the corner of her eye and she furrowed her brow as she kept playing her game. "It's ok but I need a distraction from it, ok?" Fang growled lowly and Catra rolled her eyes again. "When did you get so high and mighty? You shit in a box!" She snapped at him, unphased by her tone Fang sauntered over to her phone and pushed the device of the bed with one fluid swipe. "Oh, real mature." Catra called after Fang who was now jumping up to the highest parts of his cat tree.
She paused the game to lean over the edge of the bed and pick up her phone, a new message making the screen glow.
"Cool, mind if I come over?" Catra bit her lip in thought, glancing at Fang who was still glaring at her from his new spot. Catra sighed looking back at the phone, trying her best to ignore the judging feline.
"Sure, see you soon."
XxX
Adora woke up in a haze, reaching out her arms to search for the form of her friend but only found sheets. The blonde girl shot up instantly scanning the dark room for any sign of the wild haired girl, her breathing was ragged as panic set in. 'Where is she?' Adora got to her feet, brow sweating, ready to tear apart the house in her search until realization hit her. It was Sunday, Catra went home yesterday. Adora's body sagged in both relief and sadness, Catra was home not in her bed curled up in her arms. The tall girl let out a breath as she clambered back into bed, reaching out for her beloved stuffed cat to hold against her chest in place of Catra. The faint scent of a forest reached her nose and a pang of longing went through her chest. 'I miss you..'
Adora laid there for a bit longer, drifting in and out of sleep as she clutched the toy to her a bit harder than necessary. A small knock on the door brought Adora back to the land of the awake, instinctively shoving the toy down into the sheets where no one could see as she sat up. She didn't think Angella would take anything from her but she couldn't help the nagging anxiety that told her to hide the thing.
"Come in." Adora called, voice heavy with sleep. When the door opened instead of Angella it was Glimmer standing there, Adora tipped her head and grinned playfully at her foster sister. "Since when do you knock?" She teased and Glimmer rolled her eyes, shutting the door behind her as she crawled onto Adora's bed. The pink haired girl sat there for a moment, biting her lip and looking as if she wanted to speak. Adora waited patiently, encouragingly smiling down at the shorter girl.
"I uh.." Glimmer finally croaked out in a stutter, Adora turned her head curiously. Glimmer cleared her throat and began to try again. "I uhm. Sorry I don't know how to ask this."
Adora laughed a bit of nervousness picking at her heart. "You can ask me anything Glimmer." Adora's eyes were soft and kind making Glimmer visibly relax.
"Alright uh.." Glimmer hesitated another moment before letting out an exasperated breath. "Bow told me to be casual but I can't do this, do you like Catra?" Glimmer blurted out the question and Adora cocked an eyebrow in confusion.
"Of course I like Catra, she's my best friend." Adora replied, Glimmer stared at her for a second with the most dumb founded expression. Glimmer blinked slowly as she began to come back to reality.
"N.. No. Adora, do you like Catra? Like, more than a friend?" Glimmer raised her eyebrows in an attempt to convey the question in a way Adora would understand, but the blonde simply furrowed her brows at Glimmer in even more confusion.
"I mean she's my best friend, so I guess that's more than a friend right?" Glimmer blinked again, the same dumbfounded expression on her face as before.
"Are you kidding me?" Glimmer questioned and Adora opened her mouth to defend herself but was quickly cut off by the pink haired girl. "Do you like Catra ROMANTICALLY?" Glimmer shouted the last word and Adora's cheeks began to flush a little as she realized what the other girl was asking.
"Oh I uh-" Adora cleared her throat as she tried to compose herself, looking anywhere but Glimmer. "I don't know." She finally muttered honestly, Glimmer's eyes filled with worry wondering if she had been too harsh.
"Hey you know it's ok right? If you do I mean. Mom is cool with being gay and stuff, she was super sweet when I came out." Adora's eyes went wide as she stared at the now blushing pink haired girl.
"You're gay?" She questioned, surprised. Glimmer laughed at her expression, shaking her head slowly.
"Well, halfway there, I'm bi." She explained, Adora slowly nodded trying to form her next question.
"How.. How did you know?" Adora looked into Glimmer's pale eyes and the pink haired girl was surprised to see fear in Adora's face. She smiled and reached out a reassuring hand to gently hold Adora's.
"I guess I just did." She shrugged, trying to find the words to explain. "I think I was maybe, 5? 6? Somewhere in there and I remember having this constant feeling of love for.. everyone." Adora nodded slowly before Glimmer continued. "I told my mom I wanted to marry a boy and a girl." Glimmer laughed fondly at the memory. "She tied me as long as I'm full of love and happiness that's all that matters." Glimmer smiled at her foster sister as Adora listened intently as if she was hanging onto every word.
"I don't know what I am." Adora croaked out, looking down at her hand that was now gripping Glimmer's gently. "I don't think I've ever felt.. that way about anyone so I don't know how it feels." Adora shrugged. Glimmer seemed to think for a moment before her eyes went wide with an idea.
"How does Catra make you feel?" Adora looked up at this question, eyes showing a million different emotions.
Adora bit her lip, pausing to think over her words. "She makes me feel like I'm ok." Adora said decidedly, pausing as she pondered over her thoughts of Catra. "She makes me laugh, I always want to be around her, I'm terrified of losing her again. The thought makes me feel like I'm going to puke." Adora gave a half hearted laugh. "Do you think that's love?" Adora was surprised by the question that came out of her mouth, Glimmer was smiling gently and Adora could feel herself relax.
"I think so, I think you just have to decide what kind of love you think it is." Adora smiled at the words, feeling a bit of relief wash over her. 'At least I have it half figured out.' She mused to herself.
"Thank you, Glimmer." She murmured softly, hesitating a moment before rapping her arms around her foster sister. Glimmer was surprised but she quickly hugged back.
"Of course, anytime." As they seperated Glimmer quickly added. "But just so you know, Bow and I think you guys would be cute together. Just saying." The two laughed as Adora's cheeks turned a soft pink, ideas of Catra being hers made her heart flip.
"I'll keep that in mind." Their giggles died down and Glimmer seemed to be thinking something over, Adora could almost see the gears working in the girl's head and she smiled goofily. "Whatcha thinking?" Adora asked.
"I don't want to overstep, more than I already have." Adora laughed and waved off her words.
"Ask me anything." Adora stated, Glimmer's pale eyes looking at her with uncertainty.
"Did.. Did Catra get those scars from the home you guys were in?" Glimmer's question hit Adora like a brick in the chest and the color quickly drained from her face. "If you don't want to talk about it, it's ok, I'm sorry."
Adora quickly shook off her apology, ice blue eyes now looking cloudy and far away. "No it's ok." Adora thought for a moment, biting her lip. 'Should I tell her?' Adora looked into Glimmer's pale silver eyes and felt herself relax at the concern and gentleness that was there. "This stays between us?"
Glimmer quickly crossed a finger over her chest. "Cross my heart." She instantly declared, Adora's eyes bore into hers and when she seemed satisfied she nodded slowly.
"Yes, it was from the home." Adora's hand slowly crept up back to touch the area that her similar scar was hidden under her clothes. "I have one too."
{TRIGGER WARNING}
Glimmer reached out a hand to place it on Adora's knee, it was comforting and soft. "You don't have to tell me what happened if you don't want to." Glimmer's comforting voice made Adora smile softly, a bit of sadness hidden behind her eyes.
"It's ok, I think I would like talking about it with you. If that's ok?" Glimmer quickly nodded and Adora pondered the next words wondering where she should start. "Well, we were brought to the home when we were 3, it was Catra and I's first foster home before that we were in group homes. Her name was Ms.Weaver." Adora shivered at the name, a bit of anger flashing through her eyes. "She was an awful person, when we were little she would make us act like her little servants. When people came over she had us serve them drinks, her friends would sometimes.." Adora's eyes seemed even more far away, slowly shaking herself to come back to reality. "They would do bad things to us, mostly me. Catra was a little too high spirited for that part, I on the other hand did whatever I was told. I just wanted to be good." Adora spoke the last part softly, feeling tears at the corner of her eyes that she quickly pushed down.
Glimmer was shaking with rage but she stayed quiet, not wanting to interrupt Adora's story. "She would lock us in this disgusting basement, with an old nasty mattress and a sheet. Catra and I would sleep together every night for warmth." Adora shut her eyes at the memory, the feeling of Catra's warm body, her only fond memory of the prison she had called a home. "When we started getting older Catra would fight back, it earned her a lot of punishment. She would hit us in the face, starve us, she had this awful stick thing that she'd hit over our backs that would cut open our skin. When we were really bad she had a cattle prod to shock us with. That stick is where Catra got the scars." Adora's body shook with both anger and fear, talking about it made her feel like she was a kid again. Glimmer, seething with rage now, pushed it down and rubbing her hand comfortingly over Adora's knee.
"Whenever I got in trouble Catra would try to protect me. She would sneak me food if I was hungry, if I had to sleep outside she would stay with me, and if she ever tried to hit me Catra would get between us. It would always get her in more trouble but she never stopped trying." Tears pricked at the side of Adora's eyes and she wanted so badly to hold Catra now. "I was so scared, I was terrified of getting in trouble. Catra was braver than I was, she tried so hard to keep me safe." Tears started to fall now and Adora sucked in a deep breath to compose herself. "I would take care of her afterwards and she always told me it wasn't my fault but it was, she got in trouble for me."
Tears started to pour down her cheeks and Glimmer pulled her into her arms, the taller girl scrunching herself up curled against Glimmer as she cried quietly onto her chest. Glimmer rubbed her back in soothing circles and after a minute Glimmer spoke up. "It wasn't your fault." She spoke with such determination, Adora's sobs slowly turned into whimpers until it was quiet again. Adora stayed against Glimmer's chest as she started to speak again.
"One night though, something really bad happened. I.. I hit one of her friends. He was hurting me. There was blood I was scared so I just.. swung." Adora sucked in another breath, squeezing her eyes shut as if to keep the memories away. "She took me down into the basement, she locked Catra out and she hit me to leave the scar." Adora's hand trailed up to the spot on her back and she could feel Glimmer's eyes burning into the spot. "I never had gotten hit hard enough to draw blood, not like Catra. I screamed so loud she must've heard because next thing I knew she had busted through the look and had attacked Ms.Weaver. I don't remember how I just remember hearing this awful ripping and crunching noise, and she screamed the worst scream I had ever heard. When I looked up they were both covered in blood and Catra had ripped out one of her eyes." Glimmer's stomach churned at the thought of a small Catra covered in blood. "She locked us in the basement to go to the hospital, I think. Catra had enough and broke one of the windows to squeeze through and get help. The neighbors got me out of the basement and called for help, the police came and we were removed from the home finally."
{END OF TRIGGER WARNING}
Glimmer stayed quiet for a moment, seething with rage before she spoke so lowly that it startled Adora. "I will find her, and I will kill her." Adora let out a small laugh, tears freely flowing now. "I'm sorry Adora." She whispered softly.
"It's ok." Adora said after a moment, slowly looking up at her foster sister. "I'm safe now. I have you and Angella, I have Bow, I even have Catra back." Glimmer smiled softly at the words, a couple tears prickling at her own eyes.
"You are safe and I will make sure you always stay safe." Glimmer gave her a bone crushing squeeze. They laid like that for a while, Adora quietly crying and Glimmer holding her as if her life depended on it.
When they finally pulled apart Adora's eyes were red and puffy, Glimmer's eyes were filled with worry. "Thank you for.. being here." Adora said sheepishly.
"Of course, we're family now, we look out for each other." Glimmer replied. Adora's eyes filled with even more emotion and she could feel more tears welling up. 'We're family now.' The words stuck in Adora's head and she relaxed a little.
Adora slowly got up, pulling the pink haired girl to her feet and dragging her to the door. "Come on, I'm hungry." Glimmer rolled her eyes at the taller girl, a small smile tugging at her lips.
"Of course you are." The two burst into a fit of laughter, running down stairs to raid the kitchen.

A/N: Well this sure was a fun chapter right? Some of you are gonna hate me the next few chapters but it'll be ok I promise. <3  Who do you guys think the mystery girl visiting Catra is, a show character or an OC? Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed this and I hope it wasn't too heavy, Adora and Catra went through a lot together and I wanted to really show why Adora hates being away from Catra. Trauma is hard to get through but our girl are strong. Stay safe everyone and if you're rioting remember to cover your face, watch each other's backs, we fight together. See ya'll next time!

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