The Fires of Esus - Ranger's Apprentice

Chapter 4: We Deserve This

Will was sitting at his desk, finishing up reports to Gilan, Evanlyn, and Horace about the string of arsons when he heard the greeting from Tug. It meant Alyss was arriving home soon. He got up and moved to the kitchen, checking the lamb shanks roasting above the fire and the fresh salad he had prepared earlier. A beautiful chocolate cake, something he had been practicing baking over the last few weeks, sat frosted and ready on the table top. He had planned this meal carefully as his own 'welcome home' present, and to comfort Alyss, whom he knew missed his cooking dearly when he was gone. It wasn't that Alyss couldn't cook for herself, but he knew she preferred his meals and it was something he liked to do for her. It was an evening ritual of theirs for Will to make the meal and clean up before she came home, and then after they'd eaten together, Alyss would wash dishes and tidy up everything else. Then they would sit and open the mail together, have coffee or the occasional glass of wine, and have quiet evenings.

But all that went out the window when Will or Alyss was out of town, so it had become customary for them to have a nicer meal as a celebration when one of them returned. Based on Alyss's nerves earlier in the day, Will knew she wasn't feeling her best and did what he could to make everything perfect for her to cheer her up when she came home.

The lamb was perfectly done, so he removed it from the spit, left it to rest next to the cake, and set the table, adding a bouquet of flowers. He added some crocheted napkins that he had made a few months ago, a new hobby of his that he loved. Alyss loved it, too, it meant he could knit her all sorts of different things, and she always hung up his colorful creations on the wall. Their cabin was cozy, warm, and well lived-in, just the way they both liked it.

He heard Alyss coming up the front steps and turned just as she opened the door. She looked tired, he thought, as she hung her cloak on the peg next to his. She was pale, and her shoulders were hunched over. She set her bag down on the armchair by the fire and started walking wordlessly toward him.

He said nothing, waiting for her to speak first, but she didn't. He held out his arms, and she paused momentarily, deciding if they should speak or embrace, and then gave in and hugged him tightly. They stood like that for a long time, not moving, not speaking. Just breathing the same air and comforting each other with their presence.

Alyss finally looked up into his eyes. "I'm sorry, I know I look like a mess. I'm feeling awful," she admitted.

Will's brow wrinkled worriedly. "You look beautiful, like you always do. Tired, maybe, but not a mess. What's wrong?"

"So many things..." she peeled herself from his embrace and started pacing back and forth.

Will had learned one thing during his years of marriage. When Alyss paced, something was really wrong.

But he also knew to keep quiet and let her tell him in her own time.

Sure enough, after a brief moment of thought, she spoke. "When Gilan showed me the letter from the Baron of Stamford, I didn't initially understand what his story meant. I didn't even fully realize you had been involved directly at all, it wasn't very clearly worded since he wrote it and not you." She paused in her pacing, turned away from him and staring into the fireplace. "Then I reread it all again, and I realized how close you had come to dying." Her voice cracked, and Will winced. He had known she would be upset, but he had been dreading this conversation all the same. Seeing someone he loved upset was never a good thing.

She finally turned around to look at him. "I was terrified, just for a moment, but it was horrible. I imagined what it would be like if you never came back from that inn, and I couldn't do it."

"But I did. I came back, and I'm alright. Nothing happened," he said softly.

She nodded. "I know, but that doesn't mean that I feel good about it. I know I can't tell you not to get into danger, I know that's not fair, but I just want you to try your best to be okay, that's all I ask."

Will stepped forward, seizing her hand and squeezing it between his own. "Alyss, I do try, every time I go on a mission, I try with everything I have to make sure I can come back to you. You know that, I promised you I always would and I wouldn't break that promise."

She nodded, and the relief Will hoped to see in her eyes disappeared as her eyes glimmered with unshed tears. "I know that, I know, but there's something else..." She drew in a shaky breath.

Will held her hand and waited patiently.

"I got a letter from the doctor today." She reached into the pocket of her gown and withdrew a crumpled paper, the ink was a bit smudged with what looked like tear stains.

He had barely read the first line when he let it fall out of his fingers, fluttering down onto the ground. Will stood frozen in place for a long moment, and then collapsed into the chair behind him, his face in his hands.

"Are you sure?" His voice shook.

"He double-checked. Even triple-checked."

"So you're really pregnant?"

"Yes," she whispered.

She collapsed into the dining chair across from him. They both stared down at the floorboards in complete and utter shock.

"That's why I was such a mess today. I think I was in a daze for all of today," she continued, her voice calm, almost too calm.

"Well, now I'm a mess, so we're even." Will finally raised his head out of his hands, wiping tears off his cheeks and sighing. "We waited so long, tried so hard, and finally, what, three years later?"

Alys nodded, a small smile finally appearing on her face. "We deserve this."

"We do."

Their eyes met and they shared the moment together. This made everything worth it, all the pain and sadness they had endured these last few years. It was almost too good to be true. All of this would hit him hard later, he knew that. But for now, he would cherish the peaceful happiness they both felt.

Will stood suddenly, and mechanically started serving the dinner, still in a bit of a daze, while Alyss popped open the bottle of red wine from the back of their pantry. Will almost opened his mouth to say something, but then only smiled as she poured a single glass for him and none for herself.

"I've never been happier to turn down a glass of wine in my life," she muttered to herself.

As Will carried their plates to the table, he brought a bottle of apple juice with him and poured some for her.

As they settled down for dinner, Alyss gave him a real smile. "The food looks lovely, I missed it so much this last week."

"I'm sure you did, with only bread and cold meat for all your meals. Did you ever even light a cooking fire?" he teased.

"And that cake, you're practically a pastry chef at this point!" She exclaimed, ignoring his jibe.

"You won't be joking when you taste it. It's to die for," he assured her stoicly.

"Alright, fine, you got me there." She laughed, but then sobered up again. "Will," she said softly again, her tone apprehensive. "Are you going to have to leave again, to deal with these arsons?"

He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. "I don't know anything for sure yet. As of right now, no, I'm staying here for the unforeseeable future."

"Good," she sighed as she picked at her food. "I don't want you to go, not this soon. Not after what happened in Stamford. I refuse to get another letter about you being burned alive."

"You won't." He reached across the table and took her hand.

"I promise."

***********************

A/N You have no idea how excited I was to write this chapter when I outlined this book, it's the best moment ever and I love Will and Alyss so much! Before you ask, yes, I am aware this does not happen in the original books. I changed it, on purpose. Because I like this way better. My book, my plot, my choice. I hope you enjoy this twist as much as I do! ;)