Heart's Redemption (MxM)

Chapter 44 ~ Ian

Consciousness comes and goes. I'm aware of Sam holding my hand, of being lifted and carried; aware of being laid in the back of my truck amid a nest of pillows and blankets, and of Sam's light kisses and soft words as we rattle along, leaving the Walkers and their troubles in our dust.

Later I learn that Toni, Carlos, Jack, and Cass had stripped the tires from Karin's vehicle fast as a pro pit-stop team and slapped them on my truck, leaving Pax and Roman to fuck off on foot. Apparently they'd hated their boss almost as much as Sam did, and hadn't put up much of a fight. 

Toni drives like a madwoman, and Cass did a good job patching me up, but somewhere along the way, I fall deeper into the darkness pressing on the edges of my mind. The next time I wake up enough to really register things, I'm lying in a hospital bed, dressed only in a hospital gown, my arm and face are swathed in fresh bandages, and Sam is asleep at my side.

He's sitting on a stool, leaning forward with his head resting on his folded arms, one hand holding mine even in sleep. While my brain gets up to speed (it feels like I'm on some kind of drugs, and from the IVs trailing from my arm, I'd guess I am) I watch him—the slight rise and fall of his back as he breathes, the little line of unconscious worry between his dark brows, and the smooth ivory-gold of his skin, a little paler than usual from lack of proper rest.

I watch him until he wakes up, blinking blearily, and then smiling with relief when he sees that I, too, am awake. Apparently, I've been out of it for almost a day.

From him, and then the doctor, I learn that I've had a close call. My heart stopped several times—once at the Walkers' and again on the way to the hospital—but I'd pulled through alright in the end. They'd managed to save my arm, but not my eye.  I'd be wearing a patch for the rest of my life, and have three long scars across the left side of my face ('Just like a pirate!' as Sam had exclaimed, with somewhat troubling enthusiasm).

As for how, exactly, I'd sustained such wounds, Sam and Carlos had devised a story that was, at its core, essentially the truth.

I'd been attacked by a mother bear protecting her young.

"You're lucky to be alive, son," the doctor tells me when she visits to check on my progress. "That must've been one mean mother, judging by the size of these marks.

"You have no idea," I reply, and leave it at that.

I stay in the hospital for another day, but I heal fast—not werewolf fast, or anything, unfortunately, but a little faster than a normal man. Enough that the doctors notice and praise me for it (as though I'd made a special effort or something) and I decide we'd better be on our way before they start asking too many questions.

My vision in my good eye is 20/20, so the doctor tells me the loss of the other won't affect my ability to drive, but that it will take some getting used to, and that I probably shouldn't embark on a three-thousand mile road trip straight from the hospital doors.

Fortunately, Carlos insists on sticking with us, at least to get us home. I really don't understand why; why he's attached himself to us this way, why he's willing to sacrifice and go out of his way for a couple of dudes he's known for less than a month.

A few days into our return trip, after he's given Sam another driving lesson around an empty parking lot while I waited for our pizza order in a nearby restaurant, Sam asks him the same thing.

We're sitting at a picnic bench in a small park, enjoying our meal and the evening air, and Carlos chews thoughtfully before he answers.

"It's a pretty lame reason, I guess, but the truth is just that I like you guys. You don't make me feel like a freak, and you—Sam, at least—understand what it's like to go through what I do. I know I'm lucky I had Toni—even if she used me, she loved me and kept me safe—but I've never had much else. Friends, lovers—people don't stick around long once I go all 'Captain Howdy' on them. And I always do. You guys are the first to not only understand me but help me, too. You've shown me it's possible to have a life beyond Toni and her garage—that maybe there's something better waiting for me somewhere, someday."