Masked

Epilogue

 "Sir, in light of all that's happened... do you want me to take it down?"

 "No. This doesn't change anything. It doesn't change anything at all."

Chapter 10

It was like I was never there.

I'd spent a hellish week in the tower's infirmary, drifting in and out of a vegetative state. Even I was surprised I made it. The pellet had blasted through a noncritical vessel below my lungs, so close that if Joker had aimed a millimeter to the left, it would've been game over. Shot with my own custom titanium bullets. Figures.

Every Titan dropped in at least once, more to check in on the dozing changeling than me. The way they fussed over him, acting like every labored snore was a message from Jesus, was just another reminder of who belonged and who didn't. I caught rare pitiful glances from Cyborg, maybe Robin even 'talked' to me a few times, I don't know.

Starfire didn't leave my side. 

Every time the sedatives wore off enough for a peek beyond sleep, she was there. Night, day, time didn't seem to matter to her. She lifted salivating glasses of water to my parched mouth, ranted about my betrayal when she thought I was out cold, even broke into a sob occasionally.  It made me feel like shit.

The minute the last stitch was sealed I knew I had to go. My welcome was overstayed, and as soon as the antibiotics tapered off it wasn't gonna be pretty. I had inadvertently tried to murder their friend. It wasn't like one dramatic sacrifice would sway any hatred. 

I hastily scrawled a letter to let Boy Wonder's jamboree know I wouldn't be bothering them anymore and slipped out the rooftop like a thief in the night. 

Because that's exactly what I was.

New suit, new city, new name. The old charade was getting harder to keep up, given the identity of mysterious crimelords with "Red" in their pseudonym was painfully obvious. There was no doubt Dick had scurried off to inform Bruce that my grave had a little breakout, and relay the news of my 'miracle' to the League. I almost felt sorry for the old man. 

In case you're wondering, I didn't stop trying to kill him.

 The confrontation with the Titans played out over and over again. Sure, maybe the warehouse was different, and so were the personages trying to stop me, but it always ended the same. A gun to someone's head. People acting like they cared what I've been through. So-called heroes explaining their antiquate sense of morality. And of course, Joker's laughter. I always remembered the laughter. 

But something strange happened that night that set it apart from the others. Something that nagged at the back of my consciousness when I dismantled an underground drug trade or lodged a 45 into a whore-dealing pimp. 

I had hesitated.  Not even that, I stopped. Threw away my one chance for closure over a ragtag troop of sidekicks. Dropped the gun, took the fall. Hell, I even gave a redemption-arc speech about "revenge isn't winning" like dear old dad. It messed with my head. 

 So I nabbed some money for a trip down memory lane. 

My arrival in Jump brought the realization that I'd been avoiding the city like the plague. The atmosphere of the place had changed when I was away, less hostile, and softened with age. I walked past the Xenothium manufacturers, looted Professor Chang's man-cave observatory, and trailed the Ferraris speeding down Ding Dong Daddy's prized race track. 

I didn't know where my feet were taking me until they stopped at the lake reflecting the overarching T.  

The answer to my questions danced on the tip of my tongue, like the reason for my actions was just behind a foggy windowpane. Too many cigarettes had clouded my judgment. I usually liked it that way, because every time the smoke lifted the acidic green was back. 

But this time, emerald consumed me. 

The jade orbs shone unflinchingly in their gaze, almost as if to ask; "What do you want?"

Her.

Starfire hadn't talked to me since my escape and I didn't wait for it. I had no idea if the lineup of hormonal teens had been completely rearranged, or even whether she and Birdboy were still an item. Any tabloids I'd caught up on wove their relationship into an exaggerated tale, mixing truth with lies until the perch of crisp magazines on newsstands left a foul taste in my mouth.

Long story short, this risk would be miscalculated and stupid at best. There would be no hidden rendezvous on rooftops or sneaking around in alleyways. Just us, without masks or villains or covert agendas. I'm not gonna lie and say it doesn't scare the shit out of me. 

But I'll be damned if I wasn't going to try. 

Another leap of faith.

I stifled a smile as I knocked. Cyborg's precious security system hadn't been altered a bit. It wasn't until the  sound of muffled footsteps grew undeniably close that the butterflies in my stomach lopsided into pure panic. What am I doing? Cutie probably won't even be at the gate. It will be greenie, metalman, or goth...I'm 1000% sure she wants to kill me...

"We are not accepting interviews at the moment, please!" Starfire swung a gush of wind into the door's hinges, her deadpan trill matching the squeak of the plank. "You shall have to do the rescheduling of your-" 

The cogs of Star's brain couldn't turn fast enough to take it all in. Her face registered the surprise with a jumpstart over her mind, jaw dropped and eyes kissing over every inch of me. My leather jacket swelled with inconspicuous steam, regretting the replacement of skintight stockings with jeans that screamed motorcycle fetish.

"X of the Red?" Starfire's squeak ran up and down octaves skeptically, hanging on to every syllable of my name as if my presence was a hallucination. 

The toasted sunbeams eclipsing the terrace were like distant constellations compared to the shine of my grin. I liked that she could see it.

I clasped our hands together in a firm mock shake, fondling her palm with a coy similarity to those meeting each other for the first time.

And I guess, in a way we were.

"Call me Jason."

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I MADE HIS NAME THE LAST FRICKIN WORD IN THE BOOK. I'm way too much of a troll to be a writer.

I wanted the last little bit to be in the first person because X's character is so interesting. But there's still A LOT of unanswered questions, so....sequel???

update: sequel. "Concealed" is out now.