Delivering My Love

Chapter 8

Tai Shi awoke to Zan Yu's face just inches away from his own. He fought the urge to plant a kiss on Zan Yu's slightly parted full lips. Zan Yu's warmth made it difficult for Tai Shi to move from his position. The sweet scent of his body clung to Tai Shi as he slowly lifted his own arm off of Zan Yu, then lifted Zan Yu's arm off of where it ended up on himself. Tai Shi stood and looked at the peaceful boy sleeping on the floor. His chest rose and fell steadily. Tai Shi adjusted the blankets over him. He fought the sleep that was tugging at him back into the cot. He had to go find food for them. He went to tend to the horses first, making sure they were well fed, then returned to the cave.

Tai Shi found a sharp rock in the cave. He took a piece of string from his pack and a small sack and set out into the forest. The sky had a very faint blue tint. The sun had not yet emerged from the horizon, but it was light enough for Tai Shi to see where he was going without the need for a flame. Tai Shi ventured deeper into the forest and began to scan the ground. He picked up a long sturdy branch that had fallen from a nearby tree. Using the string, he attached the sharp rock to the wood, making a spear.

He thought back to the time that Jingfei had convinced him to sneak out into the palace forest to hunt. That day, he went to the library as usual. Jingfei set down a book and ran to him with a sparkle in her eyes. He saw the book. It was something about warrior love. She dragged him out of the library, and they walked along the shadows of the palace, avoiding the guards, until they reached the forest. Jingfei taught him how to make a spear. She said she learned it from her novel. Tai Shi was not surprised. They did not manage to catch anything that day, but Tai Shi found out later than Jingfei went out by herself and made her first kill the next day. He had been slightly jealous that she did it without him, so they went out together again. He was finally able to make a kill for himself the fourth time they went. His hunting skills were thanks to having a forest as his backyard. And Fei, of course.

Tai Shi decided to hunt by the nearest water source. He followed the faint sounds of rushing water. Eventually, the sound amplified as he approached the river. He stood at the edge and bent down. Setting the spear at his side, he scooped up some water with his hands and gulped it down. The rain had cooled the air for a while, but the heat came back in full force. He took a second handful of water and splashed it over his face and neck. The sky became bright enough so that Tai Shi saw his own blurry reflection in the water. Without realizing it, a long sigh escaped his lips. Was he really worth it?

They were on this long and tiring journey because of him. Sure, it was not his own decision, but the decision was made because of him. He knew that much. The others did not deserve to be taken away from their calm lives and families because of his fragility. Even though Fei acted strong and unbothered, he knew that deep down she missed the comfort of her library, her father and dog, and the close friends she had gathered there. And Zan Yu. He left his siblings, who are very much dear to him, as Tai Shi learned from their conversations. Tai Shi rubbed his face and turned away from his reflection.

He hid in the shade of the dark tree, waiting for an animal to appear. Waiting to take the life of another being for his own satisfaction. He was always the one taking advantage. He had the advantage since he was born. He had access to the best food, the best clothes, the best education, the best life in the entire empire. Others had lost so that he could gain. Why did he deserve this? Just because he won the lottery of being born to the most powerful man in the area. His whole life, he spent his time working to become a man he could be proud of. Someone worthy of living in the palace. A sudden movement caught his eye. Two wild rabbits hopped towards the river.

Tai Shi creeped closer to them. A spear stabbed one of the rabbits. The other began to hop away, but its attempt at escape was cut short when the spear stabbed it as well. Their lives were literally cut short by Tai Shi. Tai Shi usually did not think of such things when hunting. He knew it was just a way to survive. It was the circle of life. This time it felt like the lifeless eyes were staring back at him in disappointment. The blood of the rabbits seeped into the dry grass. Tai Shi grimaced at the memory of the large gash in Zan Yu's back.

Zan Yu had almost died. Again, because of him. He had not noticed the two nights of agony that Zan Yu must have felt as his wound became more infected. Zan Yu hid it well. Whenever he thought of Zan Yu, Tai Shi felt his face heat up. Tai Shi did not realize just how attached he had grown to Zan Yu. He looked up to the brightening sky. The sun was peeking out of the horizon, sending light through the holes of the canopy. Luckily, Zan Yu had healed quickly, and another life wasn't added to the burden on Tai Shi's shoulders. It was already too much of a burden to bear.

Tai Shi killed his sister. No, he did not kill her directly, but she died because of him. Tai Shi had always looked up to his sister. She was a very independent person but also very misunderstood. She deserved more appreciation from the emperor for all that she did to improve herself. Tai Shi was inspired by her persistence. A little more than six years ago, an assassin had entered the library while he was reading with Jingfei. The shelves were set ablaze. Crumbling at the bottom, the shelf that was closest to them tipped over. He pushed Jingfei out of the way and felt it hit his leg. He passed out from the fumes. When he regained consciousness, his father informed him that his sister passed away in an attempt to save him. She died, but he got out alive. Tai Shi could never shake the guilt he felt, deepening ever since the funeral at the palace.

Cracking away the tension in his neck, Tai Shi gingerly scooped up the rabbits, placed them in the sack, splashed his face once more, and ventured back into the thicker forest. He spotted a fruit tree. In the heat of the day, some juicy fruit would definitely help cool them down. Tai Shi approached the tree and looked up through the leaves. It was a beautiful tree, providing for its inhabitants as well as the surrounding wildlife. Tai Shi wanted to be like this tree. A strong emperor that had potential to provide for his empire. After his sister's death, he had to work even harder to develop himself into someone worthy of leading others.

Tai Shi picked the lower-hanging fruits, but even though he was quite tall, he needed to reach higher to get more. He set his sack down and grabbed a low, thick branch, hoisting himself up. He swung his lower body up and placed his feet on another thick branch. With his free hand, he gathered some more fruit. He turned his head to collect from the other side, but that was a mistake. Right in front of him was a large, green tree snake staring eerily back at him. His supporting hand was dangerously close to it. Startled, Tai Shi jumped and recoiled his hand from the branch. A bigger mistake.

Tai Shi went down. He tried to reach for another branch, but they were out of his grasp. Did this symbolize something? Is this how he would fall from grace? Alone, with not even a branch to aid him? Tai Shi's foot hit the ground at a very wrong angle. He rolled onto his side. His face twisted in pain.

"AGGGGHHHHHHHHuHuHuAAAAAHHHHHGHGHGh!" Tai Shi screamed louder than he anticipated. Thankfully, the grass was cool and soft to the touch. He sat up and massaged his ankle. Yep, definitely sprained. He knew the cave was not too far away, so hobbling there for now wouldn't be too taxing. Remembering the snake, Tai Shi grabbed his spear and sack, shuffling away on his rear from the fruit tree. Just when he thought the imminent danger had subsided, he heard a rustling in the bushes. It was definitely an animal. The heavy panting of the beast grew louder as it approached.

Tai Shi held his breath, gripping the spear tightly. Not again. The animal emerged.

Shu? Huh? The dog whined in concern. Tai Shi gave her a small smile and a nod. "You're quite a stubborn girl. Just like your mom."

Shu wagged her tail and perked her ears up. She ran back in the direction she came from. Fei was probably arriving soon. The sun was now fully exposed, light dancing off of the healthy green leaves.

"TAI SHI!!" he heard a shriek.

It was Zan Yu's voice.