ST AUGUSTINE'S MASOTSHENI ? IS IT JEALOUSY OR JUST BEING TERRITORIAL?

A FITTING TRIBUTE TO MY MOTHER

Born Florence Khanyisile Cecilia Mabaso , my mother was a second born child , in a family of six girls . She was born in the month of November of 1927 . Both her parents were educated to some extent , her mother having qualified as teacher , but she chose to be a " stay at home mum" , to raise her children , and her father was a school inspector for some time , and later became a stipendary Anglican Church priest . My mother had three aunts , a younger sister to her mother and two younger sisters to her father .
My mother used to relate how they used to tease her grandmother ( her father's mother ) because of her straight hair , which her grandmother was usually ashamed of revealing and would ,as result, always cover her hair with a "doek" ( a square of cloth worn mainly by African women to cover the head). Obviously , my mother and her other siblings had an interest in observing the nature and texture of their grandmother's hair , a rare chance they would get to have a full view of her hair was when she had dozed off in their presence . My mother says that this would be an opportunity for them to quickly examine her hair and laugh . Even though her grandmother was born out of a Mkhize clan but her parents had been of a mixed race(African and European). Her grandmother had been ashamed of revealing her hair because of the stigma that was attached to individuals who were born out of a mixed race . Fortunately , my mother and her siblings did not experience any particular hardship as a result of their fair complexion while growing up . Five of them got married to Zulu husbands and only one got married to a Coloured family .

My mother's parents valued education tremendously , as a result , they got their children into very good Catholic schools at the time . My mother went to Inkamana Roman Catholic School in Vryheid , Northern Natal , which up to this day , is still regarded as one of the best schools in the province of KwaZulu Natal .
She proceeded to St Chads Teacher Training College , in Ladysmith , to acquire her qualification .
Like her mother , who was a full-time housewife , she also remained at home to raise her six children , while my father continued to take care of the family financial resposponsibilities . My father was also a teacher , by profession , he taught in several schools around , what was known as , the Natal Province .

My father's untimely death in 1968 , was a huge blow to our family . Their firstborn , my big brother , was only eighteen years , and their lastborn , who happen to be myself , was five years old . There are four of my other siblings in between , one brother and three sisters . So our family , was relatively , a young family , by all standards . The death of our father , was definitely , going to have life long implications for the entire family . I was too small to understand anything , but my sibling's " bodytalk" , whenever they relate my father's death to me , speak volumes of how devastating and painful it had been .
My mother , on the other hand , was supposed to be strong , I guess , for our sake , and to keep the family together . I think she did that exceptionally well . I appreciate , how difficult and taxing it could have been , for my mother to raise us , all by herself , without her partner . I do not , in anyway , undermine the help and support that she would get from our extended family from time to time , but in the main , her family had become her sole responsibility . She was only fourty one years old , when my father died. I only realized , when I was already a grown up man that , in fact , those early years , were the most difficult years for my mother , she had lost her husband , who had been the sole breadwinner , and as young and as vulnerable as she could have been , she had six children to raise . There is a SeSotho phrase/idiom which goes like , " Mosadi o tshoara thipa ka bohaleng (a woman holds the knife by the sharp end of the blade). This means that a woman would do everything in her power to make things work , my mother fits this description .  She assisted at my father's younger brother's shop , in 1969 before she got a teaching post in Dalala primary school , just a few kilometres away from home .

I joined her in 1970 , when she started teaching in Dalala , I was in 2nd grade , and she became my class teacher for the duration of that year . I think my mother was naturally a strong person , she soon assumed the athletics oversight responsibility at the school . Dalala was a Lower Primary School , with no male teacher , except it's principal , Mr Ntombela . The principal had a very limited number of teachers at the school , so my mother ended up being given the sports portfolio . My mother excelled in athletics , and our school got a recognition in the regional inter schools competitions that year .
Her school was a few kilometres away from home , so we were staying at a rented place weekdays , and would go home over weekends . This again , was a challenge for her . Two of my sisters were staying alone at home during the week , and my mother had to make arrangements , at least , to have someone who was going to sleep over at home with them . These sleep overs , continued for sometime , when I went back home in 1971, we still depended on getting someone to sleep over , to look after us nightime . We survived that period , we never experienced any danger over that period until one of my sisters , was big enough to look after us . My older brothers , were already at the university .