Only Numb

Chapter Four

I woke up and my head was pounding and my body was screaming for water, as I opened my eyes I had no idea where I was. As I sat up from the unfamiliar couch I passed out on my whole body was aching and It reminded me that I crashed and burned on Jennah's back porch and landed into the pool last night. My knees had band-aids on them and my hands were scrapped but I don't remember even getting bloody. The more I looked around at my surroundings I realized I wasn't at Jennah's anymore and this place did not look like Cody's or Mark's place and that's when It hit me. I went home with Adonis last night...

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Last night had gone out of hand so I only did what was right. I laid there In my bed staring at the ceiling thinking to myself that maybe taking her to my place wasn't smart. I know nothing about this girl but her name, but I couldn't just let her pass out somewhere at that party. I got out of bed and put some sweats on and walked to the kitchen for some coffee and right as I opened my bedroom door there she was.

"Oh hey- I-"

"Do you want some coffee?"

"I really shouldn't "

"Why? It's just coffee"

She was becoming persistent on leaving and I can't blame her, she was in a stranger's home. But a part of me wanted her around, something about her just made me feel so curious. I could tell she was tired and in pain, but looking past the makeup smears on her face she was beautiful. Seeing how the morning sun hit her face made her eyes look like pools of golden honey and the way her curls fell off her shoulders she looked so vulnerable just standing right in front of me. I didn't know her or her life, but something about this moment made me feel like I didn't want to be alone even for a few more hours I just couldn't let her go.

I stood there looking up at him in silence, he wore baggy sweats and socks and his hair fell in front of his face and that's when I noticed he wasn't wearing a shirt. I could feel my hands getting sweaty as my eyes locked onto his muscular body, he was finely sculpted with every sharp curve of his defined body it was so hard not to notice it felt like it'd be disrespectful not to notice anyways. Compared to last night I noticed more about him; As he lifted his arms grabbing the top door frame stretching his body out ever so slowly I noticed even more tattoos I couldn't see before, the way his skin looked so soft, and his eyes were even more intoxicating than I expected. Not only was it awkward being in some guy's apartment but standing in front of him like this isn't the ideal situation I was hoping for. I needed to get out of here because I knew the longer I wasted not going home the more trouble would bring when I did go home. I'm not ready for the pain to be brought when I step through the front door, plus I only know this man's name and as much as I want to stay and find out what happened last night it's not worth the time and energy. overall I shouldn't have gone last night, I should've pretended to be sick instead and just have to give Jennah a gift card. Adonis finally moves past me into the kitchen, I don't think he understood me when I said no to coffee.

"The longer I stay the more trouble I'll be in"

"Why? do you have work or something?"

"Uh no m-my husband is probably just worried about me"

"Oh, so you're married?"

Why did I feel let down when she said that? she's just some normal girl. It shouldn't bother me even in the slightest that she's married yet here I am wanting to pour her a cup of coffee and to just get lost in a conversation with her. I stood there as the coffee maker was percolating with a curious expression on my face wondering what her husband was like and what kind of marriage they had. But I know if I tried to find out It would just be a reminder of how I will never see this woman again.

" Does it surprise you that I am?"

" I mean a bit, yeah, I mean you don't see many people our age married"

"Yeah but people our age got pregnant at sixteen so it can't be that much of a surprise"

" Haha well that's true too, but how come he wasn't there last night?"

A question I hoped to avoid, well any questions about my husband I wanted to avoid. I mean how am I supposed to get out of here now without coming off as suspicious?

"I should probably get going-"

"Yeah, you're probably right"

I didn't want her to slip through my fingers and walk out the door but If my wife had stayed at a strange man's apartment overnight I'd be livid. I nodded and watched her walk out the door, walking out of my life and never return really. I just try to remind myself that she's nothing special; I'm just a lonely bastard is all.

⨳⨳⨳

After my poor escape from Adonis's apartment and making it to Jennah's to get my car, I finally pull up to my driveway dreading the moment he sees my face. You can never really prepare for the pain, no matter it is physical or verbal at the end of the day I had to figure out a way to prove I'm okay and nothing is wrong with me. I release a long sigh and turn the car off, as I walk around the corner to the front door I see him standing on the doorstep with his arms crossed and eyes filled with rage. There were no words as we walked into the house; he slams the door behind me as I'm taking off my shoes and that's when the fear crept up and my heartbeat fast feeling his breath on my neck. He starts to run his hand up my neck and into my hair, grabbing a fist full of my hair and pulling my head back his jaw was clenched and i became even more scared.

"Where have you been"

"Gone obviously"

" And did you ever think that you shouldn't have left to begin with?"

I become more tense as he shifts my face to make eye contact with him, his grip getting tighter and tighter pulling my hair even more. There was silence and empty eye contact between us, I had nothing to say to him and all I could think of was if I keep my mouth shut the faster I can go to bed. Thank god I was right too, I could see him get more tense but his grip loosens and I'm free. I ran as fast I could upstairs locking myself in the bedroom, as I'm changing I could feel the lump in my throat getting stronger and the tears in my eyes were making it hard to see. Yeah he was more calm than I expected but If anything else tips him off today I know I'll be getting hurt worse. I just need to hide.