The wrong number...

part 29

bryce...
me: oh it's you bryce
B: are you okay

Bryce sits down next to me

Me: not really
B: talk to me
Me: he kissed me bryce why would he do that?
B: Katy i really can't speak on jadens part a whole lot but from what I know he still loves you and misses you and the fact that your with nick kills him.
Me: but why can't he just control it bryce it's been almost 10 months since we broke up how could he still be in love with me when we barely talk.
B: Katy when you love someone so much that feeling doesn't just go away it stays with you for a long time until you finally can move on and even when you move on that feeling is still there because of how strongly you loved them.
Me: he just confuses me and idk what to do, i love nick so much and i can see him in my future but jadens always in the back of my mind. Somewhere in my head i know i still love him but i just had to move on because I'm with nick now and i love nick i do but jaden...
B: well Katy you can't be in love with two people and im telling you this now. You really need to take time and figure out who your really in love with and go for it because if you stay like this loving 2 people it won't work out. You need to figure all this out before going back to either one of them.
Me: but if i pick one i lose the other one
B: so say you pick nick, you won't lose jaden Katy he has stuck around for 10 months he really cares about you and he loves you, he won't just get up and leave he's gonna fight for you. Because you fight for the people you love. But with nick i couldn't tell you but i know if he's a good enough guy and he loves you he will understand and he will support you no matter what.
Me: thank you so much bryce, you really are an amazing friend.

I turn to hug bryce and then let go

Me: i need to go talk to them, both of them
B: go go

I get up and run to the door, I see charli and run up to her.

Me: charli charli hey can i please use your room not for anything bad but to talk to some people please ill explain later.
Charli: ofc Katy go ahead

I walk up to charlis room and I go to my phone and text jaden

Me: hey can you come up to charlis room please we need to talk.
Jaden❤️: yea ofc brt

About 2 minutes later I hear the door open and I see him...

J: what's up katy
Me: jaden we really need to talk
J: okay
Me: but all you need to do is listen okay?
J: yeah go ahead
Me: jaden you were the first guy to make me feel love again after my ex. You were the first guy to make me feel somewhat remotely special. You were the first guy i actually feel madly in love with. Looking back at all of this now jaden im still in love with you and i always have loved you but it's way more messy than me just saying i love you and getting back together. I have nick which i love too and he's an amazing guy, he treats me like a princess but idk jaden i-i just don't know. You both mean so much to me and i can't pick you both and i don't even know if you would want to be with me anymore after all of this. But kinda what im trying to say is i need time to figure this all out, i need to figure out who im really in love with because i can't love 2 people i just really can't.
J: Katy
Me: yea
J: can I talk now?
Me: yea
J: loving you has been the hardest thing i have ever done in my life.

I look down and tears start to go down my face. He looks at me and pauses and then picks my chin up

N: but listen im not done, it's also been the best thing i could ever possibly do. Look yes we've had many ups and downs and we haven't always got along but that's in the past. Katy i can really say i love you so so much you are the love of my life and i wouldn't change that and ik your confused right now but im not i want you in my life katy, i want to be the person you love and wake up to everyday, i want to be the person you want to grow old with and love forever but that isn't my decision and i get that. Your with nick right now and i don't know how long your gonna be with him but all i can say is that i will wait for you because you are worth the wait. Your worth every second of it because katy i really do genuinely love you and i will wait no matter how long it takes. But also i will understand if you do chose nick

I look at jaden and smile lightly.

Me: no matter what you will always be my first true love...

He looks at me and he puts his forehead on mine and smiles.

Me: jaden i have to talk to nick
J: go go ahead
Me: i kiss his cheek and walk out

I walk downstairs and see nick talking to noah i walk over to them and smile at Noah

Me: hey nick can we talk?
N: yeah

I grab his hand and walk up to our room and close the door

N: what's going on katy
Me: im gonna talk and your gonna listen and i mean really listen to what im saying okay?
N: okay
Me: nick i love you well i think i really do. After tonight and what happened with jaden and you i need to think about who i really love because i can't love 2 people I can't. You have been so amazing to me, you treat me amazing and i could never thank you enough for that. But i still love jaden too but i do love you too and idk what to do. Jaden was my first real love and your my love right now, you are really amazing nick and I do love you but i need time to figure out who i really wanna be with forever because i can't just continue to sit around and know i love you both. But I also hope you understand and respect my decision to have time to myself and figure out what i want because at this point all i need right now is time.
N: Katy i do love you more than anything and if time is what you need for you to come back to me then ill give you your time and space. But what does that mean for our relationship right now?
Me: ik this is bad to say but a break? Just until I figure stuff out.
N: what if you find someone else besides jaden and i
Me: im not going to get with anybody else nick i have to figure out who i wanna be with before i do anything i just need the time to think.
N: if time is what you need ill give you the time...

I go up to nick and hug him and walk downstairs and see bryce. I walk over to him and quinton

Me: hi boys
B: you all good now?
Me: yeah um can we talk?
B: ofc

I grab bryce and pull him into charlis room

B: so what's up
Me: I talked to both of them and nick and i are on a break and jaden told me he would wait no matter how long even if i choose nick. But then nick was like what if you find someone else while your trying to figure stuff out, and i just said i won't because I wanna take this time to myself.
B: that's good Katy you just need time
Me: but idk what to do bc i sleep in the same room as nick, so i guess I just have to go home for awhile
B: stay at sway we have extra rooms
Me: are you sure bryce
B: yeah ofc and plus we miss u around there
Me: I'm gonna go pack a bag and then I'll grab it when we leave
B: okay

I walk out of chars room and walk across the hall to nicks room now

I walk in and see him I walk over to the closet and grab some clothes

N: what are u doing?
Me: while I take my time im gonna stay somewhere else just for awhile until I figure stuff out...