𝕔𝕒𝕝𝕝 𝕞𝕖 𝕙𝕠𝕓𝕚. [ʜɪᴀᴛᴜs]

Day 1

yoongi and hoseok were at the park, hanging out like the two heterosexual bros they claim to be while namjoon and jin accompanied them, being the happy couple of the group.

suddenly, the topic about hoseok's muscles came up and he didn't miss the opportunity to tease his hyung.

"yo, yoongi, show me your arms"

"no way, bro, you just wanna make fun of me"

"nah bro, i just wanna show them your arms"

"im not gonna show you my--"

yoongi was saying until hoseok yanked him forward, lifting up his sleeves and showing his friends yoongi's noodle arms.

"there you have it, folks. the skinniest arms I've seen!"

"bro, shut the fuck up, your dick is probably skinnier"

"no way, bro, my dick is thicc"

"yeah, as thick as my arms"

hoseok quickly put his hand on his chest, putting on an offended expression.

"and how would you know?"

while the two were bickering, namjoon and jin decided to leave them and go out to eat ice cream together and maybe make out in the process like the two openly gays that they are.

"bro, i think they're gone"

"i can see that, hoseok"

"why are you so mean to me?"

"you're always making fun of me, you deserve it"

"i dont make fun of you, i tease you!"

"no, hoseok, because teasing is gay and you're not gay."

hoseok just awkwardly laughed and invited yoongi to his house for lunch.

~time skip after lunch~

"ight, yoongi, what you wanna do now?"

"bro, let's compare dick sizes"

now, yoongi was joking but hoseok didn't get it right away.

"yo, you're a genius, let's do it"

"i'm..."

yoongi stopped talking when he saw hoseok taking his pants off and gulped once he noticed he had no chance of being bigger than hoseok by just looking at the bulge through the underwear.

hoseok noticed yoongi staring and once again, teased him.

"still wanna compare them? you seem a bit worried..." he smirked.

"pfft, me? worried? you're so off"

"then why the pouty face?"

yoongi stayed silent.

hoseok took initiative and went to unzip yoongi's pants but yoongi being the panicked gay he was, slapped hoseok's hand in a heartbeat.

"ow! yoongi, you were the one to give the idea!"

"i... i gotta go!"

yoongi grabbed his phone and yeeted out of the hoseok's house leaving him confused and curious at the same time.

yoongi ran to his house which wasn't that far away and didn't even bother saying hi to his mom as he sped to his room, closing the door.

he was panting and very flustered.
why did he run away like that?
he was sure hoseok thought he was a coward by now but can he blame him?

yoongi pulled his pants down, looking in the mirror and sighed.
he didn't even feel like telling the readers his size...

(yes, i can break the 4th wall if i want to, hoes 👁👄👁)

he pulled his pants back up and went to bed and since he didn't have anything better to do, he just fell asleep and didn't wake up til the next day.

once he woke up, he checked his phone and saw he had 6 missed calls from hoseok and 1 message from jimin.

yoongi's face lit up for a second before quickly returning back to it's usual state.

don't check the message... his inner voice warned him but yoongi being a helpless simp , checked the message anyways.

jiminie🐥:
heyyy ;) wanna hang out later?
sent at 9:36am

yoongi checked the time that clearly said 12:57pm and before he noticed, he was already out of bed, heading towards jimin's house forgetting to return hoseok's calls.

~meanwhile at hoseok's~

hoseok checked his phone every 10 minutes to see if he had any calls from yoongi but nothing.

he couldn't understand what happened that made yoongi panick? it's not like hoseok would laugh at yoongi for his size; he was just curious, plus yoongi started it...

he thought about going to yoongi's house but then remembered yoongi usually wakes up late and hoseok didn't really wish to die this young.

he decided to text taehyung and tell him to meet at a cafeteria for lunch since he had nothing better to do and wasn't a lazy ass like yoongi.

~at the cafeteria~

"aye, it's good boy!"

taehyung just cringed at the poor choice of nickname and sat next to hoseok at a table.

"sooo,  why the sudden urge to see me?" taehyung teased.

"meh, yoongi wasn't answering and i already hanged out with namjoon and jin yesterday"

to say taehyung was disappointed was an understatement.

"when will you get over yoongi?"

"what do you mean when? he's my best friend"

"yeah sure, cuz friend's compare dick sizes."

"HE SUGGESTED IT" hoseok defended himself.

"HE WAS JOKING" taehyung tried knocking some sense into him.

hoseok was going to say "didn't seem like it" but now that he thought about it, it kinda did...

"ugh, why am i so stupid?"

"finally, you acknowledge it."

•
•
•

"oW!" taehyung whined and hoseok just huffed.

"i didn't call you to embarrass me" he added.

"and i didn't come here to be your marriage counselor" taehyung spat back.

"i wasn't even gonna talk about him!"

"well, you did."

~meanwhile at jimin's~

dInG dOnG~

yoongi ran the doorbell to jimin's house and not even a minute passed when jimin swung the door open and jumped on yoongi, hugging him tightly.

"hyung, i missed you!"

yoongi didn't say anything and waited for jimin to finish.

"i thought you wouldn't come..."

"sorry, i woke up late" yoongi replied while scratching the back of his neck.

"hehe, nothing new" at this point, jimin was still hugging yoongi and yoongi was too weak for him to let go himself so they just stayed like that til jimin spoke again.

"let's go to the cafeteria! i bet you haven't had breakfast yet~"

"you know me so well..." yoongi said showing his gummy smile.

and so, they went to the cafeteria, unaware of the people they would encounter once again...