Chapter 21

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Chapter 21

Monday comes and Deeana texts, and gets nothing. Her heart is hurting and all things are running through her mind and they are not positive at this moment. All she could think about is what happened? She tries to keep herself calm but it doesn't work, composer is slipping.

She waits till the afternoon and still nothing which just makes all her insecurities come out even more. Did he change his mind? Did he not like her in person?

She goes to her computer and writes him an email, asking him those questions and more. For him to please let her know what is going on? She writes a long email not able to hold back how she feels. That was something new to her, her emotions and feelings were there and coming out, not hiding them anymore or building up a wall. It scared her even more to feel this way, she opened up, and now he is going away. The love she has for him, she hasn't had for anyone before, he was all she ever wanted. Just the thought of it all going away as fast as it happened, kills her inside.

She sends the email but gets no response, which makes her even crazier inside. She feels low, hurt and this huge push to want to fix whatever is going on. Thinking of ways to be able to talk to him, to hear from him what is going on. Can this be fixed?

Later that night, she figures to call him, thinking he would be going home from work.

"Hi, this is Joe." He says.

"Hi." She replies.

"Can I call you back soon?" Joe asks.

"Sure," Deeana replies knowing someone is there.

An hour goes by and he doesn't call, which leaves her wondering even more. She can't help herself and texts him.

"Joe Please tell me what is going on?" Deeana asks.

"I am still at work, something came up. I have a lot of work issues and my family is having problems. You have to kindly back up just a bit." Joe answers.

"Ok, Sorry. Is it us? Did you change your mind?" She replies.

"It's ok, No, I didn't change my mind. I know I had a lot of time before but now I am back to normal again and I am getting hit everywhere." Joe states.

"Ok, I get it, I just wanted to make sure that was all it was." Deeana answers.

I have plenty on my plate all of a sudden." Joe says.

"I just wanted to make sure, we were always together. It made me wonder." Deeana replies.

Joe doesn't answer, and if Deeana is all honest she doesn't feel any better.

She tries for the next few days to send texts here and there to check-in, but he doesn't answer. At first, Deeana has a little hope, feeling that it was just work, and family. It's why she still sends the check-in notes. Just after a week, she doesn't feel that anymore. She feels he let her go, just in a nice way. That he didn't want this anymore. Her heart is broken.

On that Sunday she goes to call him feeling that maybe they can talk, he can let her know what is going on. Even if it was to break up, at least she would get the closure she needed. Just when she calls him, it goes straight to voice mail. This kills her inside and she starts to cry, going to her friend Brenda.

"Hey," Deeana says.

"Hey, girl, what's up you sound upset," Brenda says.

"I tried calling him, it went straight to voice mail," Deeana says with tears rolling down her face.

"Did he block you?" Brenda asks.

"I have no idea, I don't know what is going on. I feel so lost. I miss him so much." Deeana answers.

"Give me his number, I will call and see if he rings or what," Brenda says.

"Ok," Deeana replies. not sure if this is a good idea or not but at the same time wanting to know.

"It's just ringing no voice mail. It could either be the phone or he blocked you. What happened?

"That's just it, I don't know what happened. He just got quiet on me. He said he was busy with work and family. I understand that at the same time...he can check in here and there. I don't know what to think, or do." Deeana says.

"Give him space and see what happens. Don't call, text or email.. Let it go. He needs space give it to him." Brenda comments.

"Ok, I don't know what is with me, its so hard to stay away from him. I have never been this way before. I feel like a freaking stalker at times, and I swear I'm not. I just don't want to lose him." Deeana admits.

"I understand, just give him some space. It might be good for both of you." Brenda answers.

"I'm falling apart so not sure how good that is," Deeana responds.

"It will be ok Sweety." Brenda replies.

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