Baby Bender | Andrew Clark

nine

massie's pov

brian, john, claire and myself are sitting in a circle laughing hysterically. john lights claire up and she coughs the smoke out. brian and i laugh at her. brian exhales and tries to eat the smoke.

"chicks, cannot hold der smoke. that's what it is." brian says in a really weird voice.

"do you know how popular i am? i'm so popular. everybody loves me so much at this school." claire says.

"poor baby." john replies. brian waves claire over to him, but he falls over, making john, claire and i laugh.

andrew's pov

i emerge from a really smokey room. i inhale another puff and start dancing. everyone, minus allison, claps for me. i go back into the room i came from, and scream towards the glass door, causing the glass door to shatter into thousands of pieces.

brian and i sit on the couch laughing. allison is hanging near the statue, and claire, bender and massie are somewhere else.

"you got a middle name?" i ask brian.

"yeah, guess." brian tells me.

"your middle name is ralph, as in puke." allison says walking over to us. brian and i look at each other in confusion. "your birthday is march twelve, you're five-nine and a half, you weigh a hundred and thirty pounds, and your social security number is 0-4-9-3-8-0-9-1-3."

"wow! are you psychic?" i ask, impressed. 

"no..." allison replies.

"well would you mind telling me how you know all this about me?" brian asks.

allison reaches into her bag and says, "i stole your wallet." she produces it in her hands and grins.

"give it to me." brian orders.

"no." allison says.

"give it!" brian repeats. allison hands it over to him and brian makes sure everything he owns is in it. "great! you're a thief too! huh?"

"i'm not a thief." allison states.

"multi-talented." brian says.

"what's there to steal? two bucks and a beaver shot." allison says.

"a what?" i ask.

"he's got a nudie picture in there! i saw it!" she states.

"alright, let's see!" i say.

bender's pov

i brush my teeth with one of claire's cosmetic brushes, while she goes through my wallet pictures. massie's doing god-knows-what.

"are these your girlfriends?" claire asks.

"some of them." i answer.

"what about the others?" she asks.

"well, some of them i consider my girlfriends and some... i just consider." i say.

"consider what?" she asks.

"whether or not i wanna hang out with them." i tell her.

"you don't believe in just one guy, one girl?" she asks.

"do you?" i ask.

"yeah, that's the way it should be." she says.

"well, not for me." i say.