𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 : hiding under cover(s)

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I lay in bed later that night, with Dabi fast asleep next to me. When I got home, he had already let himself into my apartment with his spare key. The evening went as I expected with him, and now I was wide awake with a hundred thoughts per second preventing me from sleeping at two in the morning.

Things ended a little awkwardly with Hawks. He didn't text me after our abrupt farewell, and I worried that I had messed up. If I answered Dabi's phone call in front of him, though, that would have been a whole new problem. I desperately wanted to know his intentions. Although, I was sure he was thinking the same thing about me.

Could I offer to meet up with him after work tomorrow, maybe? What if he was busy? Or maybe he decided I was no longer worth his time? And even if he said yes, what would Dabi think? Would he spiral into another jealous rage, despite being the ring leader of this whole ordeal? My skull felt like it was going to crack under the pressure of my worries.

My phone lit up on the night stand next to me, catching my attention. Squinting my tired eyes, I picked up the phone and hid both myself and the bright screen under the blankets.

______________________________
< (XXX) XXX-XXXX i
______________________________

02:17

Hey, sorry for the late
text, can't sleep. Hope
you got home okay.

______________________________

My eyebrows drew together in both confusion and curiosity. I found it odd that he decided now was the time to reach out to me. Nonetheless, I had a job to do.

______________________________
< (XXX) XXX-XXXX i
______________________________

02:18

hey!! i'm sorry that our
night was cut short,
i actually thought i was
pretty good at flying
hahaha :p

i did make it home
ok too, thanks for
checking on me!!! :)

______________________________

I had then realized that I still hadn't added Hawks as a contact yet. I tapped on his number and typed his name, and a new text appeared on the screen.

______________________________
< hawks🦅 i
______________________________

02:19

Haha, look at us, a
couple of night owls.
Glad you made it
home alright.

Do you mind me asking
who called you?

______________________________

I supposed that he would've asked sooner or later, so I quickly made up something to seem realistic enough.

______________________________
< hawks🦅 i
______________________________

02:19

oh, it was my friend
that was supposed to
meet me for dinner.

it's all good now, we
talked things thru :)

Glad to hear they came
around in the end!

How come you're up so
late anyways?

______________________________

He was getting a little nosier than I liked. Definitely not because I was thinking about how my relationship is currently riding on whether or not I succeed at getting information from you, pssh, of course not.

I also didn't want to admit that my late night thoughts were about him, either. Even with Dabi next to me, I still found inklings of desire for Hawks' warm embrace when he had lifted me into the twilight sky with him.

It was just... different.

______________________________
<                           hawks🦅                           i
______________________________

02:20

i was just grabbing a
glass of water from the
kitchen, i was gonna
get back to sleep. got
another long day at
work tmrw🥱😣

i'm glad we talked
tho :))

______________________________

I stared at my text message after I pressed 'send.' I was actually very relieved that the ambiguity was settled. Our unsaid words were bothering me more than I cared to admit. The hurt I saw on his face had burned into my memory, whether I liked it or not.

After about a half of a minute of examining my text, I shut my phone off, being shrouded in darkness again. It was getting hard to breathe under the blanket, so I peeled the layer of fabric off and inhaled a fresh breath of oxygen. My hand lazily set my phone back down on the night stand, and I rolled back to face Dabi. His bare back covered in scars faced me, rising and falling steadily in a rhythmic beat. I reminisced on our first meeting, smiling from the memory.

Girls with boyfriends usually act like they can shut down any guy who is remotely friendly.

I pondered those words. I might have been defensive before, but I felt like I didn't need to be with Hawks. Was it because half of what little he knew about me was a lie? I didn't have to shut him down if I was just spoon-feeding him false information in the first place.

I had been unconsciously pushing down guilt ever since I first spoke to him. There was a part of me that wanted to be just as carefree as he was about our new friendship, but I knew if I didn't keep my head on a swivel at all times, I could be facing serious consequences. My connections with Dabi could get me in serious trouble, and I was not in a position to be in custody of the police.

A new idea came into my mind. If I really loved Dabi, shouldn't I be willing to make the sacrifice of my clean criminal record, job, and freedom? Or was he asking too much of me as a person? My eyes remained focused on Dabi's sleeping figure.

I guess I would just have to wait out my thoughts until the morning.

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⏰ Last updated: Aug 28, 2020 ⏰

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