Dib Fucked Up

Chapter 5: Everybody Knows Shits FUCKED

Zim is very close to the atomic bomb, holding a detonation remote that would shoot the bomb right through the ceiling of his base into the air, and it'll explode, causing the end of the world.

Dib starts to inch towards Zim, attempting to snatch the remote from him, but Zim points Dib's gun right at him.

He backs up a little, holding his hands up near his body to show Zim that he means no harm. He tries to talk Zim out of causing the end of the world, and he says this...

Dib: "ZIM! Please... DON'T blow up the Earth with dog shit-"

Zim: "nO! Being polite won't save you this time Dibshit! You stuUuUupid motherfucker!"

Dib: "ziiMmMm! If you blow up the Earth, then you'd blow yourself up too, you dumbass! You'd kill yourself too if you released that bomb into the air--"

Zim: "I already have plans for that. Zim has an escape pod with your slut ass sister inside of it because Zim is taking her with him- she a SNACK!"

Gaz: (Inside of the escape pod and waves a little) "DAAAAAYYYYUUUUM RIGHT!"

Dib: "HOW THE FUU--"

Zim: "Anyhow- pREPaRe fOr yOur dOoOooOooOom- AHAHAHA-"

(As Zim is about to press the button on the remote, Dib starts talking really fast and panicky.)

Dib: "U-UH- WHAT ABOUT GIR? DON'T CHA NEED YOUR ROBOT SERVANT?"

Zim: "My escape pod only has room for three. And that is for Zim, Gaz' fine ass, and Minimoose. Gir always gave Zim hell every single day and second with his stupidity. So Zim is leaving him to die with your fugly ass on Urth, Dib."

Dib: "UMMM.... WHAT ABOUT FUN DIP? yOU cAN'T liVE wiTHOUT fUN (Big mega ass voice crack) diPpPpp?¿?"

Zim: "Irken fun dip tastes better than the crappy fun dip here on Urth."

Dib: "U-U-UHHH-"

Zim: "Now SHUT THE FUCK UP with your pathetic ass excuses, Dib. And prepare for the end of your WOoOoOORrRRLD! AHAHA!"

(Dib's face turns really red as he gets filled up with frustration. He's really done with Zim's shit: This is the breaking point for him now. His face shows his extreme anger, and he growls like a rabid furry.)

Dib: "NOOOOOOO!!!! NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOO!!! I'M GONNA SAVE MY PLANET- MY HOME! AND THEN yOU ARE GONNA F U C K  OFF BACK TO
Y O U R PLANET FOREVER.....
Z I I I I I I M!!!"

Zim: "Huh-?"

(Dib tackles Zim and gets him away from the atomic bomb. Zim immediately drops the remote on the ground as Dib tackled him. Dib aggressively takes the gun away from him, and yeets it away to Narnia. Zim screeches "GET OFF ME," but Dib doesn't budge a single bit.)

(After having a totally epic anime fight between each other, they are both equally beaten up since they both have equal body strength.)

Dib: "It's time to end this. For once and for ALL!"

"Omae wa... mou shindEeEeiRrRuUuUuu!!!!"

Zim: "N-Nani?!" O_O

(Dib moves his labcoat out of the way, and spreads his asscheeks, preparing his ass for his super-duper-totally-cool-epileptic-seizure-causing-disintegrating laser ass ray.)

(Zim starts to beg for mercy, and tries to convince Dib of why he shouldn't disintegrate him.)

Zim: "DIB- WAIT-"

Dib: "I cannot undo my ass ray Zim. If I do, then it'll shoot right back up inside my body, and it'll disintegrate my insides. Once I prepare it, it must go out. What the fuck do you gotta say Zim? I'm so tired of your shit--"

Zim: "OK OK ZIM WON'T SET OFF THE ATOMIC BOMB."

Dib: "You won't?"

Zim: "YEAH- I... I WON'T! PLEASE- ZIM BEGS FOR MERCY!"

Dib: "Hmm... hMmMmmMm... hUuHh-mmMmmm...."

"OK!" ^w^

Zim: "Phew!"

(Dib backs up a little and tries to aim his ass in a different direction, so he can shoot his ass ray somewhere else. But then he accidentally steps on the detonation remote on the ground...)

Zim: "Welp, we're all fucked.. Thanks to YOU, DIB!"

(Zim hurries up and scurries away inside his escape pod. He gets the FUCK outta there, and quickly flies away into space to who-knows-what.)

The remote doesn't even work and the atomic bomb didn't activate, but sadly, Dib doesn't know that after he fires his ass laser away to somewhere else where it didn't harm anything or anyone.

Dib: "GOD DAMMIT- I... I RUINED THE WORLD! N-Not Zim... I'm... I'm the worst hero ever... "

(After Dib has a sad little pathetic piss baby tantrum, he kicks the atomic bomb in anger.)

Dib: "Wait a minute... the atomic bomb didn't even go off! HAAA!!! ZIM- YOUR STUPID LITTLE REMOTE DIDN'T EVEN WORK! YOU HEAR ME SPACE BOY? I WOOOON! HUMANS ALWAYS WIIIIN, ALIEN SCUM!"

(As Dib starts victory dancing, the atomic bomb goes crashing right through the roof of Zim's base due to that kick Dib gave it earlier.)

The air starts to smell heavily of rotten dog shit, and....

KAAAAAAABLLOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!

♡The End!♡