7. Beautiful Realization

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I was having a flood in my mind, and for a second I freaked out. I don't know why I was scared. She was there standing in front of me. The fear wasn't really about hiding but was about answering her. It was very hard for me to start a word. She might have been in shock but why would she even care? Do I care? Why am I unbearable to this pause? I know a moment with someone is like a pause we realize only after the moment's over but this wasn't such. I was constantly aware of her and the pause. I was confused about her feelings or her first words. I was waiting eagerly, I wished she would be the one to spell the first icebreaker. In my mind, all I was thinking was was going to freak out, get disappointed, or judge myself. But all in all, why do I even care? Do I like her? I have been with her, really, only with her, ever since we started our journey. But, is it enough to like or even be affected by someone? Am I overthinking or...

Suddey, she asked, "Was she Prakriti?"

It was an easy one. I just nodded, yes.

But the confusion was with her smile. She smiled. Didn't I get what I expected? Or, Did I get what I didn't want? I wasn't sure what was going on. I wanted her to act normal. Yes, she did. But was her acting normal an abnormal behavior? Do I want more? Will she ask more? Will she argue? But why the "smile"?

In all this confusion, I didn't reply to anything. She again asked, "Are you all right?"

I knew it was late already. I thought I should at least say a word. I replied like a deadlock PC.

"Yes, Prakriti"

"I also want to meet her." She replied in excitement.

This was all I wanted but somehow wasn't expecting.

"No she went, she is with her daughter. Let's go."

"Finally you met. I am glad about that."

"I think it wasn't that great."

It was strange to me. Meeting Prakriti earlier and now Smriti's reaction. I wasn't ready for this. I didn't talk much and headed towards the hotel. She was trying to get track of me but later she also didn't try.

After reaching the hotel, we went to our rooms and freshened up. She came into our room and they all started to plan the trip. They were planning to go to Sarangkot and then to Rupa Lake. At first, we were planning to drive in the Car itself but Vandy wanted to repair the dent. So we decided to take a ride. We rented three bikes.

Roshan and Kshitij got into one, they rode with each other in a condition to ride turn by turn. Vandy was a speedster, so Smriti wanted to ride with me. We rode quite a few times also in Kathmandu.

We started together but, we lost the company of boys. Smriti was enjoying the ride, time, and again she would spread her hands and close her eyes. I was looking at her from the rear mirror. I wasn't going too fast; trying to concentrate on the road and taking a glance at her from the mirror.

Although Smriti was trying to make the travel by talking about the places she saw, I wasn't into talking. Her normal reaction was bothering me. I wanted her to ask me questions and everything. She was trying to build a conversation but I wasn't giving her answers. She was furious about that.

She asked, "How was your meeting? What did you guys talk about?" and tried to put her ear as near as possible to listen to my answers. But I wasn't ready to get out of the thinking that she was fine. Now I have started to think about this. I started to realize, I may have started liking her. I remembered Prakriti's last text. It was after she was married and her daughter was around a year old.

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