Double Knot

Anywhere now I don't even care

Chan was at his desk in his studio.

The conversation between Changbin, Jisung, and Jeongin still haunted him.

He had badly reacted, he saw how Jeongin played with his fingers waiting for some kind of comfort. Chan had ignored the signals, he had let Jeongin believe their relationship didn't matter.

He had pushed him directly into Na Jaemin's arms, into his fucking ex's arms.

He was feeling guilty.

Chan played with some beats, not really focused on his work. It was already late in the afternoon, Jeongin's schedule was surely over now.

He wanted to take his car keys and drive to the Park's mansion to pamper Jeongin in kisses and tell him how sorry he was.

The producer turned off his computer not in the mood to work anymore. He took his pack of cigarettes and went to the rooftop to take a smoke.

He needed to relieve some stress away, usually he would go for some sex but it was out of the question, he didn't need to add cheating to his lack of consideration.

He went down the hall and took the elevator.

Chan smoked five cigarettes, all of them making him feel even more shitty.

He had failed, as Jeongin's boyfriend and as his hyung. His mission was to put him on a pedestal, treat him like the angel he was and make him feel loved.

Being an idol was already so stressful, he didn't deserve relationship problems too.

Chan slept in his studio that night, his fingers glued to his phone. He had tried to write at least one valid excuse text to Jeongin failing miserably.

Now his phone was dead, discarded on his desk and his head full of words he had wanted to say.

The next morning was horrible, he had a headache and his body was hurting from sleeping in an awkward position on his desk chair.

He plugged his cellphone and waited to finally send a message to his boyfriend.

Chan decided to ask if they could meet tonight and of course Jeongin accepted.

His boyfriend was too good to be true.

Chan left the JYP building in the early afternoon, took his car, to go to the nearest shopping mall to buy a gift for his boyfriend. Jeongin didn't need anything in particular, he could have everything he wanted if he asked his manager, so Chan was really a man on a mission.

He took half an hour to choose the cutest Fox pushie and purchase it, after that he went for the fluffiest baby blue sweater and took two hours.

His next stop was a bit particular.

Victoria's Secret.

Jeongin had an obsession with lingerie, he had a part of his gigantic closet reserved for it.

Chan was obviously charmed by this aspect of his boyfriend, Jeongin was really pretty in everything really but when lingerie was involved, he was divine.

The Australian didn't need a lot of reflection, a very nauthty idea clouding his mind. He wanted to see Jeongin in a dark colored lace body. His boyfriend usually liked bright colors like blue, pink or white.

Chan chose a wine colored lace body under the flirty eyes of the shop helper, he cringed internally, feeling quite awkward.

He went to the register barely avoiding her not so subtle flirt attempts, his imagination going wild with the picture of his not so innocent Jeongin, his fair pale skin contrasting with the dark lace.