dangerously ↝ a. hotchner

o n e

Aaron Hotchner stalked into the office bright and early as usual. His jet black hair brushed neatly out of his eyes and his face contorted into that of a seemingly permanent frown.

He used to smile.

But recently he hasn't felt the need to. After seeing what him and his team see almost everyday, the smiles start to fade after a while. His home life wasn't any better; when he wanted to come home to spend time with his wife and son, she was more interested in fighting with him about work. It was a never ending cycle of misery — which is why he was always the first one to arrive and the last to leave. Paperwork was better than tears and broken hearts. At least, that's what he told himself.

"Morning boss." Garcia greeted him with a huge smile on her face. "Paperwork day today?"

He nodded, a ghost of a smile threatening to tug at his lips. His technical analyst never failed to make him feel at least a little bit better every time he saw her. It was kind of hard not to feel all light and cheery when a short woman with brightly colored clothes and feathers in her hair asked you what the weather was like.

He nodded at the incredibly smiley woman. "It is a paperwork day today. We have lots to catch up on." The team had been working on back to back cases for the past month, the stacks were definitely piling up.

Garcia excitedly went to tell the others, thankful for the receiving a break from staring at all that blood and gore that came from looking at and inspecting crime scenes. Aaron trailed slowly yet determinedly after her.

"Paperwork day." She sung out to the remaining members in the bullpen.

Reid's face broke into a smile as he heard those words, he let out a little yay and immediately produced a thick stack of papers from thin air. Morgan groaned, getting his out and the team followed suit.

Hotch greeted the team and then went straight to his office, bypassing Rossi's office and locking himself inside his.

Him and Hayley had yet another futile fight last night about him never being home — while he was home. It had ended with her calling him a good for nothing husband and father, to which he responded with heavy silence and a night in the guest bedroom.

He knew he spent a lot of time away from them, but he loved his job and he had tried to tell her that without it, he wouldn't have a purpose in life.

To which she laughed in his face and said that if he didn't think that being a father was his whole purpose in life, then it was obvious that he loved his job more than his family. He walked out at that point. Imagine if he said that to her, she might have shot him.

The problem wasn't the fights. It was this sinking feeling in his stomach that she was right. That he prioritized his job more than his wife and son and that he cared more about the job than them.

It confused him, because before Jack was born, Hayley never had a real problem with him being gone for days on end. She'd be sad when he left and happy when he returned, excited to spend time with him. Then Jack came and suddenly she was mad at him for having a job.

He shook his head slightly, trying to clear his mind from those thoughts. Focusing back on his paperwork, he delved into recounting the terrible things they'd seen on the last case they worked. Once he did that case, he moved on to one of the earlier ones. He dug through his desk, trying to find the papers, but he came up empty handed.

This meant he had to go home and get them, they were probably in his study.

He sighed heavily as he stood up, grabbing his keys. It'd just be a quick stop home, he'd get his files and then leave quietly. Hayley didn't need to know he was there — not that she particularly cared at this point.