Forever Yours

12. Rosmerta's

The screech of an owl woke Severus up the next morning.  At first he thought it was Speedy because her cage was right by his bed, but when he raised up to see, she was fast asleep.  He frowned and hopped up out of the bed, nothing on but his lounge pants.  He hurriedly put a robe around him and combed his long black hair, a habit he'd had since he was younger, and walked out into his office.

Lulu was perched on the arm of his desk chair, and lying there in front of her was a letter.  He smiled.  Lucy hadn't wasted any time in writing him this time, as he figured she wouldn't.  His heart started to race in his chest as he picked up the letter.  He expected Lulu to fly away like she had been doing lately, but she didn't.  Even as he pulled the chair out she stayed right where she was.

"You're going to stay with me a little bit this morning, then?" Severus asked her.

Lulu cooed.  She wasn't going anywhere.  Severus yawned and stretched as far as he could.  He was rather tired from his patrol the night before.  He had caught Quirrell heading up to the third floor, which is where the Sorcerer's stone was hidden.  When he asked him what he was doing, he stuttered his way out of it and turned in the other direction.  He was up to something.  That much was clear.  Dumbledore had been right.  He tore open the letter and unfolded the paper inside.  It was much longer than he expected given the fact that she had already told him everything, at least he thought she had.  Lulu hopped off the chair arm and flew onto his desk.  She stretched her wings for a moment.  Severus smiled at her and then turned his attention back to the letter.  Maybe there was something more to her story.  Curious, he started to silently read the words.

October 16, 1991

Dear Severus,

When I read that you were a Death Eater, I stopped.  I didn't want to read any more after that.  I just couldn't believe that someone like you, the person I had met that night ten years ago, could have the black heart required to be one of Voldemort's followers.  That's when I realized that there had to be more to the story.  When I finished reading the whole thing, I was crying.  I can't even imagine how unbearable the pain was for you to learn that Lily was dead after all you did to try and save her.  I'm glad that you're on Dumbledore's side and that you are protecting her son.  That is the strongest kind of love.  Devotion, I mean.  I admire you for having the strength to do this, to protect him like you're doing.  The gesture probably wouldn't mean much to Harry now if he were to find out, but down the road, when he's older, it will mean the world to him, Severus.  I know it will.  I don't hate for what you were.  You were simply misguided.

You said that I changed you.  Well, you changed me too.  I was different after the first time I met you, amazed by the fact that a man could love someone so deeply that it would tear them apart like that to lose someone they loved.  I expect you get tired of hearing me refer to 'that night' because you can't remember what happened, so I've decided that I'm going to tell you, and I can tell you the whole story because you know the reason why I was at that bar in the first place.  That part of the story I have already revealed to you.  I was looking for somewhere to drown my sorrows and Madame Rosmert's pub was the first place I apparated to after we moved here after Renee was killed.  When I walked in you were already sitting there at the bar.  I didn't pay no attention to you at first.  I just sat one a stool and made myself comfortable.  I ordered a drink and I saw you have a few.  Suddenly I found myself wondering what you were doing there.  Natural curiosity I guess.  You got up, headed to the bathroom, I guess.  You plowed right into my chair and knocked me in the floor.  That was when I noticed your eyes.  You had been crying...a lot.  You helped me to my feet and apologized.  I asked the barkeep how many drinks you had.  She told me that you had drank five already.  I watched and I waited for you to come back.  A few minutes later, you resumed your post on the stool.  I got off of my own and took the one beside of you.  You didn't seem to notice at first.  Not until you heard the two guys beside of you discussing something in hushed whispers.  A howl like a wounded animal suddenly sounded.  It took me a minute to realize where it was coming from.