The beginning of every hero starts off like SHIT.

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"Hi, my name's Solarium. You may be thinking, 'Ooh, a new hero! Is he rich? Buff? GODLY?' But, I'm actually none of those things. My parents hate me, and treat me like garbage. I've had just about enough of their shit, and I'm gonna kill them. They're watching a sitcom right now, so I have a chance. The difficult part is getting out of here. My door is made of solid iron. I've tried escaping before, and let's just say it didn't go too well. Here goes attempt number 700 of escape." I tried slithering through the bars. Absolutely nothing. I tried breaking through. Nothing. My last attempt was pulling the bars apart to open a hole to climb through. "Wait, the bars are creaking. THE BARS ARE MOVING. HOW? I'M SO THIN, HOW IN THE WORLD?" I asked myself. I crawled through the hole, and silently walked to my dad's room. 'He's a godly cop, so he should have a god killing gun, and yup, he does.' I thought to myself. I took the gun, and snuck to the living room. I shot my dad first, and then my mom. Next were all of my siblings. Bam. Bam. Bam. Bam. The floor was covered in blood, and dead bodies. This sight... made me want to laugh. And I did. I laughed like a madman, and all I could say was: "YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE NEGLECTED ME, FAMILY!" I thought I got off, scott-free, but alas, I forgot a silencer. I'm such an idiot.

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