Can't Be Hidden|| Bill Weasley [2]

05

Sirius was wide awake in bed reading over a book he had stolen from the bookshelf in his and Madison's house when he heard Niall begin to cry. It made him yearn for a child, he really wanted one regardless of the night time feeds. He then heard the other bedroom door opening and feet padding on the wooden floorboards to the nursery.

"Come on shush." He heard Harley say since the walls to the spare bedroom were rather thin.

Niall continued to cry so he thought he would go and see if everything was okay. When he entered his saw Harley cradling Niall who was sobbing in her arms. She was rocking him gently and had her eyes scrunched up tightly as if she was in immense pain.

"Does he need changing?" He questioned softly, "only it smells a little."

Harley sighed and laid Niall down on the floor she grasped a new nappy and stripped him of the spoilt one. He continued to cry and wriggle around as she wiped him clean and then when she went to replace the nappy she began to struggle once again. Instead of doing it for her, Sirius knelt down beside her and instructed her on what to do. When Niall was in a fresh nappy she point him back in the cot and hurried out of the room.

"Good night little buddy," Sirius cooed, shuttling the door behind him and followed Harley down the stairs as quiet as a mouse.

She was nowhere in sight. He expected her to be sat on the sofa or making a warm brew, the last place he expected to find her was the pantry. Especially not with a bottle of red wine to her lips. Instead of shouting or screaming, he gently took the bottle from her, put the cork back in and slipped it back into the cupboard. As tears rolled down her cheeks and held her gently.

She was ashamed. So very, deeply ashamed that she had succumbed to the power of alcohol. She swore she would never drink it and now she found herself wallowing and escaping with it. Just because she struggled to change a nappy. She was just like her parents? What was next? Was she going to hurt Niall? She disgusted herself.

Sirius led her away from the pantry and into the living room where he sat them both down on the sofa. He cradled her as if she was the baby and not the mother. He knew motherhood was hard but this was next level.

He had observed how each time Niall cried Harley would be the one to wake up and tend to him. He could see the bags underneath her eyes sagging and her happiness fading. He promised himself in that very moment that he would do anything in his power to help Harley. Anything at all.

"When did this start? When did you start drinking?"

"Three weeks after he was born." She mumbled with a yawn slipping out afterwards. She hiccuped too from the tears that clogged her throat and wiped the snot from her nose on the sleeve of her nightshirt.

Sirius' heart sank, her eyes bore the scars of her childhood and they shone with shame. It was clear she despised what she was doing.

"I can't do it, Sirius, I can't do anything. He cries every time I hold him! I can't change a damn nappy! He doesn't like feeding when I do it. I'm not a good mother-"

"Stop it right now! It will take time, sweetheart, nobody is perfect at the start. In fact, no mother is ever perfect. You just do what you can do and try and try again with the bits you can't." Sirius told her, "does bill do any of the nighttime feeds or changes?"

"No."

"Why not? That should be a share duty."

"He has work."

"So what? If you keep being the one to wake up, you'll fall asleep at the wrong time and something could happen to Niall. He needs to do his share, I don't care if I'm butting my nose in, he should help, even if he only does one of them, that's an extra bit of time in bed for you!"

Harley shook her head and stood up, tugging at the roots of her greasy, blonde hair. "They both deserve better-"

"Stop!"

"No, Sirius! Look at me! I'm a mess! I am drinking to numb the pain, I'm drinking to forget about how hard I'm finding looking after Niall. He doesn't even feel like my child. It's as if I'm permanently babysitting. I don't feel any love towards him and I want to. I really want to. I don't want to drink or feel this way. I want my baby and my family properly but I'm never going to get that because I'm destined for a crappy life!"

Sirius went to grab her arms but she already stormed out of the cottage and onto the beach. Sirius chases after the woman who ran across the golden sand, in just a long night shirt. He didn't even have time to think about transforming into his animagus form because she was gone with a large CRACK! only seconds later.

He sighed in defeat and collapsed on the sand. This was a major problem.

Instead of going back and waking Bill. He did apparated from Shell Cottage to the Lupin household where Lyall and Belle awoke to the loud arrival. Belle shuffled out of her bedroom and hid behind Lyall who outstretched his wand as he descended to the ground floor. When he saw it was a sand covered Sirius he sighed in relief and lowered his wand.

"Sirius, son, it's the early hours of the morning. What is up?" Asked Lyall, flicking on the hallway light.

"Is Harley not here?"

"No, why?" Questioned Belle, "are you not staying at Shell Cottage with her, Bill and Niall?"

"I am but she left. Lyall I think she's suffering with Post-nebular depression-"

"Post what?"

"Post-nebular depression. You know where they have depression after the birth of a baby?"

"Post-natal depression," corrected Belle. "What makes you say that?"

Sirius explained everything he had observed and what Charlie had said from the previous day and Lyall was flabbergasted. "And she didn't say anything until now?" Sirius shook his head, "does Bill know?" He shook his head again. "Right well, I'll alert some other aurors who can help look for Harley, you go back to Shell Cottage, wake Bill up and tell him what is going on. Belle, darling can you go to your father's, I shouldn't trouble him but he'll only be a moody bastard if we kept him in the dark. I'll then go to the Burrow and see Molly, she'll be able to help more. If anyone finds her, send a patronus? Got it? She's very vulnerable and lord knows what could happen to her."

"I'd rather not think the worst, Lyall."

"No, no, of course not. Well, what are we waiting for? Chop, chop!"