Guilt. There was no second he could look at All Might's thin body and not think that it was his fault. The guilt felt like a little worm that dug from your head to your stomach and stated there to eat your guts. The more it ate the bigger it got. The less Bakugou could ignore it.
He wasn't even listening anymore to what was going on in the front. But he listened carefully and was terrified to his heartbeat that had suddenly started to rise. His hands were shaking.
No, no, no! Not here! Not in the classroom. Not with everyone around.
Bakugo raised his hand.
"Yes Bakugou", Aizawa said.
"Can I go to the bathroom", I asked. I knew my voice sounded pressed but I had to focus hard on keeping my hand from shaking.
Glowy eyes seemed a bit surprised normally only Mineta asked to go to the bathroom in the middle of class. I really don't want to know why but I have some guesses.
"Sure", Aizawa said in his monotone voice.
Quickly I stud up my hands in the pockets and head down. I knew it looked weird. Most of all for me. But they couldn't see my fucking face.
As soon as I closed the door I started running. Everything was turning.
I could barely open the bathroom door my hands shaking so bad.
Trought the hot tears running down my face I could barely see. Luckily I still had the strength to lock the damn door before broke down completely.
I curled up on the floor because of the unbearable pain in my chest. As I was burning up from the inside.
I wanted to hit something to explode something to scream. But people would hear. All thoughts slipped away and I couldn't think. That state went on for a while.
Shit! how long had I already been gone?
Would Aizawa send someone?
I had to fucking calm down. I should be better than this. Than anyone. The Katsuki from two months ago would be fucking ashamed. He would despise me.
I was getting air properly again. A look in the mirror. It wasn't as bad as I thought. Still a little red but it would be okay.
I returned to the classroom very quietly. I had been gone for like 15 minutes. Some people gave me strange looks behind my back. I tried to look as scary and angry as possible so that no one would ask questions.
But looking mad when you just want to cry is getting harder every fucking day.
The bell rang. Lunch. I tagged along with shitty hair & co. to the cafeteria. They didn't say anything about how weird I behaved before. At the table, we were talking about internships. I just casually said and yelled some stuff so they wouldn't get suspicious. It bored me after a while and I decided to text the Snowflake.
"futur_number1_hero"
Oi, what's up?
from "burned_snowflake"
Nothing much. Just having lunch.
"futur_number1_hero"
What are you eating?
from "burned_snowflake"
Cold soba.
Hey did you get some sleep yesterday?
"futur_number1_hero"
Yeah little bit.
from "burned_snowflake"
Good
Bakugo didn't know why he wanted to tell a stranger that he had a panic attack. That he was suffering. But who could he tell but a stranger? There was no way how the snowflake would find out who he was just from that. He wanted someone to listen. To hear him. Maybe it was for the best that they didn't know each other.
"futur_number1_hero"
Eyy... yesterday you said I could talk to you.
from "burned_snowflake"
Yeah sure, what do you want to talk about?
"futur_number1_hero"
Well... I know this must is pretty fucking random telling you something like this...I mean we haven't really texted a lot.
I just want someone to know...
from "burned_snowflake"
Okay... I'm listening.
"future_number1_hero"
So I'm not a freak or something
but today at school I think
I had a panic attack
from "burned_snowflake"
What?... really? That sounds pretty serious.
Have you had any others before?
Do you want to say what triggered it?
"futur_number1_hero"
No, not really. sorry, I said something.
I just wanted someone to know.
I was weak for a moment.
I'm fine.
from "burned_snowflake"
It really doesn't sound like it.
And it is never weak to ask for help.
I may not be the best example of it
but talking is good.
You can talk to me.
What the hell was wrong this that guy? What would he get out of this? Of listening to how weak Kazuki was. Did it make him feel better when he saw how weak other people are or what. Such a freak.
"futur_number1_hero"
Let's talk about something else
from "burned_snowflake"
Okay.
Do you just want
to ask each other questions?
"futur_number1_hero"
what kind of questions?
from "burned_snowflake"
whatever you want.
"futur_number1_hero"
okay i start.
Do you play an instrument
from "burned_snowflake"
No, but I d love to play the guitar and sing along.
What is your favorite food?
"futur_number1_hero"
Don't really have one but it should be spicy
(I'm sure you sing well)
cats or dogs
from "burned_snowflake"
cats
(no not really but I like to sing
when I'm alone)
The color of your socks?
"futur_number1_hero"
What the hell of a weird question is that?
But they are black.
hair color?
from "burned_snowflake"
complicated.
describe yourself in three words!
Shit that was a question. What should he say? How he saw himself. Or how other people saw him. Yes, he should describe that mask he had been trying so desperately to keep alive for the last two months.
"futur_number1_hero"
amazing, strongest, genius
and how the hack can a hair color be complicated?
from "burned_snowflake"
Do you really think that of you?
"futur_number1_hero"
Hell yeah!
And you are avoiding my hair question.
from "burned_snowflake"
well, it's just not that easy.
"futur_number1_hero"
What the fuck. It sounds like you in a relationship
with your hair or something
from "burned_snowflake"
Yes, sure I have a relationship with my hair. It is on my head. How could
I just ignore it.
"futur_number1_hero"
That's not what I fucking ment idiot.
from "burned_snowflake"
It is your turn, isn't it?
"futur_number1_hero"
yeah...
Do you like yourself?
from "burned_snowflake"
No.
"futur_number1_hero"
Wow, that answer came quickly.
From "burned_snowflake"
What did you expect?
Anyways the bell
just rang i have to get to class.
"futur_number1_hero"
Okay... bye.
from "burned_snowflake"
bye.
"Bukugo are you deaf!?",phone charger nearly screamed in his ear.
"What the fucking hell is your problem. Do that again and I'll blow you in a thousand pieces.
"Sorry man but the bell rang and you were nearly hypnotized by your phone. Who were you texting? shitty hair asked while getting ready to return to class.
"non of your damn fucking business" Bakugou yelled and stormed ahead. The boys following him exchanging curious looks.
YOU ARE READING
My Stranger - Todobaku
FanfictionBakugou has been rescued safely from the league of villains. Everyone acts like nothing has happend. Like nothing has changed. Like everything is fine again. Bakugou does too. He pretends as if he doesn't wake up from nightmares every night. As if h...
